This weekend's release of Gods of Egypt got me thinking about the fact that we never get great movies opening on Oscar weekend. Studios must be betting that those of us watching the show are too busy prepping movie-themed party snacks to sneak in something special at the movies. Instead, they usually cater to an audience who'll likely be avoiding the big show. Hardly a new standard for release schedules, this weekend has been a dumping ground for forgettable cinema for some time.
Like the notorious poor quality of early months of the year, this weekend rarely gifts us with cult classics or enduring pleasures either. You have to go back 1997's Oscar weekend to find releases that still have vocal fans: TNT staple Selena (remember good Jennifer Lopez?) and Liar Liar (remember good Jim Carrey?). The previous year had David O. Russell's underappreciated sophmore film Flirting with Disaster, which did get some precursor love.
However, for something timeless and Oscar recognized, this weekend's biggest standout in modern memory is Pretty Woman. Julia Roberts performance as What Do You Want It To Be Vivian wasn't the most recent Oscar nominee debuting the weekend of the ceremony.
Let's see how far back we have to go to get an Oscar nominated film released on Oscar weekend!*
*full disclosure: I cheated, but you will totally agree why after the jump...
2015 - Birdman wins as Hot Tub Time Machine 2 opens - see how quickly the movies of this weekend are forgotten? Stick around, it's about to get weird.
2014 - On the same weekend as winning an Oscar for 12 Years a Slave, Lupita Nyong'o sort of starred as a sort of concerned flight attendant in Non-Stop, another movie where Liam Neeson kills people - this time on a plane.
2013 - Ben Affleck got Argo the gold, while The Rock starred in Snitch, which is probably getting its very first and only mention here at The Film Experience.
2012 - The Artist was a mostly silent winner as Amanda Seyfriend yelled about her missing sister or something in Gone.
2011 - Nicolas Cage starred in Drive Angry, which is also something fans of The Social Network did after it lost to The King's Speech.
2010 - The Hurt Locker wins and That Movie That Shall Not Be Named opens. *it won 2 Oscars, but see, I told you you would agree... moving along
2009 - Slumdog Millionaire was our last winner to sweep, and Fired Up! opened. What's Fired Up!? Great question.
2008 - No Country for Old Men took the night and Larry the Cable Guy vehicle Witless Protection happened. Foreign Language winner The Counterfeiters also had its real opening after a 2007 qualifying release.
2007 - Scorsese's The Departed was the winner as Jim Carrey got creepy in The Number 23.
2006 - Crash and Ultraviolet. You get the picture.
2005 - Million Dollar Baby wins - Cursed opens. The production story of Cursed is more terrifying than the film, but makes for a fascinating read.
2004 - The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King was the inevitable sweeper, while Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights was quickly forgotten. The unwanted didn't have much of a chance regardless as this weekend was also for behemoth The Passion of the Christ.
2003 - A mixed bag for the gays this weekend with a win for Chicago and Cuba Gooding, Jr. serving stereotype in Boat Trip.
2002 - Another rough one for the gays with homo-ignoring A Beautiful Mind and broski Sorority Boys. This weekend also saw the rerelease of E.T. The Extra Terrestrial - wouldn't Oscar weekend make great timing for a quick big screen revisit of a classic instead?
2001 - Glaaaadiator won, but more importantly, Heartbreakers opened! It stars a "Back in the USSR"-singing Sigourney Weaver as Jennifer Love Hewitt's mom as they try to con and seduce super gross Gene Hackman. It's on Amazon Prime right now.
2000 - American Beauty gave us peak Spacey, but Romeo Must Die gave us peak Aaliyah.
1999 - A very Ben Affleck weekend with Shakespeare in Love winning and Forces of Nature opening.
1998 - We made it! Titanic obliterated its competition and Primary Colors began its long walk to next year's Oscar ceremony. It was nominated for Best Supporting Actress for Kathy Bates and Best Adapted Screenplay for Elaine May, and lost both. Also opening was that shower door that revealed Kevin Bacon's penis in Wild Things.
While the weekend is meant to celebrate quality films, what are the bad movies you celebrate?