There's already been quite a stir over the two nominated Best Original Song nominees that producers decided not to include in the telecast: Racing Extinction's "Manta Ray" by J. Ralph and Anohni (our only transgender nominee) and Youth's "Simple Song #3" by David Lang (also Nathaniel's 2015 favorite). The reason for not including these songs with their more famous competitors in the telecast was "time constraints."
The timing of the Oscar ceremony is undoubtably tricky, so let's do a little math.
- The three performed songs each were shortened from their full length, a great way to still get them on an already long broadcast. "The Writing's On the Wall" lost the most time at almost two minutes, but "Earned It" was the shortest performance at roughly 2 minutes and 30 seconds. Let's assume the two unfamous songs should be given that amount of time as a minimum.
- "Til It Happens to You" had the longest intro at 2 minutes and the longest applause with 30 seconds. Since a popular political figure wouldn't likely introduce the songs, factor in about a generous minute and a half for intro and applause.
- At four minutes per song, we now must find 8 minutes to trim from the broadcast to fit in these performances.
Now I'm no expert on the minutiae of planning a massive production like the Oscar telecast, b most of these suggestions require minimal logistical shifts. Some, like less animation production, could even save a headache or two. Having funny bits throughout the show is crucial to a memorable telecast, which is why bits like the spoofs of The Danish Girl and The Martian will always be essential. But when focusing on honoring the nominees, you'd have to pick and choose your battles on what extra pieces stay and go.
So we'll do just that after the jump...
Let's find the time after the jump for these two songs to get their due! Ready: GO!
- Cut 30 seconds off the long opening montage - start with footage from nomination-less films like Furious 7 Approx. Time Saved: 30 seconds
- Stacey Dash. The joke landed with no one and only made her look worse Approx. Time Saved: 30 seconds
- Limit presenters time to go off script with soft jokes that go on too long - we're looking at you Ryan Gosling and Sarah Silverman Approx. Time Saved: 1 minute
- The Girls Scouts bit is great, but it popping up twice means some time can be shaved Approx. Time Saved: 30 seconds
- The "Black History Month Minute"/Jack Black video is funny, but takes a full minute to land a single joke. It can go Approx. Time Saved: 1 minute
- Someone should have said "no" to Sacha Baron Cohen wasting extra time on presenting Room in character Approx. Time Saved: 30 seconds
- Seeing Buzz, Woody, and the Minions is okay, but doesn't need to run so long Approx. Time Saved: 30 seconds
- The visit to the movie theatre bit is a rehash that was better the last time Chris Rock hosted. It's also long enough to allow an entire song performance Approx. Time Saved: 3 minutes
- Always a logistics complaint: get below the line nominees seated closer to the stage to save time on the victory march Approx. Time Saved: 30 seconds (but safely more)
And there you have it: 8 whole minutes with which to fit the missing performances without making any more sacrifices to the actual nominees. If these are sacrifices that can't be made, then simply add them into the show without cutting anything. This year's telecast ran 3 hours and 38 minutes long. When your show is that long anyway, why insult contenders who have earned their nomination over a mere 8 minutes?
If you haven't already, be sure to listen to the two Best Original Song nominees not included in the big show!