by Seán McGovern
About ten months from now, there will be a press release from the Academy informing us that some of the 24 categories will be handed out during the commerical breaks. Initially there will be uproar all over again. How dare they?! Didn't we go through all this last year? What an outrage! But then I'll turn to you and say 'yeah but remember those make-up people who won for Vice?' at which point we shall all accept this harsh but necessary decision...
Now look, I don't want to be mean to normal people who are obviously magicians of their craft but if you were there to prove to everyone at home that your category deserves to be broadcast, wouldn't you... I don't know, rehearse? Prepare? Plan anything? Maybe have some idle chit-chat as you get settled in your seats? You were the second award of the night, guys!
Some highlights from the best-worst speech of the evening!
- oh you're here?
- go...go ahead...
- Mentioning SAG, at the Oscars, for some reason.
- A landscape printed sheet of A4 paper.
- Kenny...k-k-Kenny... Myers?
- Literally turning off the mic and the lights.
Congratulations once again to Greg Cannom, Kate Biscoe and Patricia Dehaney on their Oscars.