The Film Experience

a series by Christopher James looking at the 'Gay Best Friend' trope

Don't worry, Teddy (Gene Wilder). Buddy (Charles Grodin) isn't going to take your girl, he's gay.The recently passed Charles Grodin (1935-2021) leaves behind an enviable film career. From Beethoven to Clifford, Grodin mastered being the “straight man” in comedies opposite zany characters. The master of reaction shots, Grodin knew how to wring laughs out of being the “put upon wet blanket.” His career features many other great performances, including The Heartbreak Kid, Midnight Run, Heaven Can Wait, The Great Muppet Caper, Dave and Ishtar. In all of the many obituaries that have recently been written about him, few have mentioned his role as Buddy in The Woman in Red ...and with good reason. The movie may have won an Oscar (Best Original Song for Steve Wonder's "I Just Called To Say I Love You"), but it has little cultural footprint today.

The misogynistic film is best left undiscovered. However, Grodin’s Buddy has an interesting distinction of being one of the earliest out, sympathetic gay best friends in a popular, male-centric comedy…

Right off the bat, we’re in hot water. Gene Wilder’s mild-mannered married man, Teddy, watches as Charlotte (Kelly LeBrock) steps over a grate that blows up her skirt. After dancing with her dress blown up, she walks away, walks back and then dances some more, showing off her underwear. The male gaze is overwhelming. He’s overcome with horniness and makes it his mission to cheat on his wife with her. This involves lots of “hilarious” mishaps, including Teddy accidentally inviting his co-worker Ms. Milner (Gilda Radner) on a date instead of Charlotte.

Buddy loves to cheer his friends up, even if it means pretending to be blind and causing a scene (again, the movie has not aged well).

Teddy: [buying a new suit] Buddy, are you sure this style suits me?

Buddy: You want to look good at funerals?

Teddy: No, no. I'm just sayin', I wanna look nice, that's all.

Buddy: Let me see. Put your arms down. Now you're cooking with Crisco!

Much of the movie is spent with Buddy and his group of friends. Joey (Joseph Bologna) has just been thrown out of his house once his wife discovered his frequent affairs. Buddy (Grodin), along with Mikey (Michael Huddleston), use comedy to deflect the tension and be there for their friends. When Joey gets thrown out of the house, Buddy pretends to be blind and destroys a restaurant that threw Joey out. These friends never interrogate each other’s bad behavior. Rather, they delight in debauchery and trade stories of cheating on their significant others.

Thus, when Teddy talks to his friends about “The Woman in Red,” they’re all for him cheating on his wife. At this point, it has not been revealed that Buddy is gay. Yet, he’s saddled with the one thing all gay best friends must do: a makeover montage. In an effort to spruce Teddy up for his date with Charlotte, Buddy gives Teddy a makeover. By straightening his hair and putting him in an ill fitting suit, Buddy has apparently made Teddy irresistible to Charlotte. She’s responsive to every advance of Teddy’s without any sort of motivation. “The Woman in Red” is as fully formed as the title suggests. Buddy, like the movie, is rooting for this odd pairing to succeed, though never giving a reason why it should work.

Even when he comes out, Buddy still gets to be one of the guys, in all their cheating glory.

Teddy: I thought you'd painted this place.

Buddy: I was going to, before I moved in with my friend.

Teddy: Well, you've got a nice chair.

Buddy: Thanks.

Teddy: What color you gonna paint?

Buddy: Shocking pink!

While the four men are having lunch, talking about cheating on their wives (quite literally), an older man walks up to the group. He returns a bracelet that says “Eric” that Buddy had got from a guy earlier. It becomes clear that Buddy was just like the rest of his friends. He was with this older man, but cheated on him with a younger guy named Eric. With this, he became the second person in the group to be thrown out of his home for cheating.

Teddy goes to visit Teddy at his single person’s apartment. He still has boxes everywhere and the place is in shambles, as he was always at this other man’s place. For a fleeting moment, the movie stumbles upon an honest moment. Teddy understands how little he’s been involved in Buddy’s life, even though Buddy has been very involved in all of their lives. Buddy is so used to masking his sexuality and life that he breaks the tension. With “shocking pink,” Buddy finally acknowledges to his friend that yes, he is gay. Also, yes, he can be the butt of the joke.

Buddy gets to go through life as normal with his friends after this. They continue to get into hijinks. He continues to help Teddy try to bed Charlotte. For 1984, it was great to see a gay character come out and still have the same relationship with his macho group of friends. This level of acceptance wasn’t commonplace. By today's standards, Buddy is underwritten and engages in similar levels of misogyny as the rest of the men in the movie. However, at the time the movie came out, this level of normalcy in a male-focused comedy was incredibly positive.

For being a supposedly “light” comedy, the takeaway from The Woman in Red is rather dour. Men are trash, women are trash, love is fleeting and everyone cheats. Cue laugh track. This isn’t to sound puritanical. Cheating is never presented with any degree of nuance or context. Every character, gay or straight, follows their libido towards whoever is closest to them. Gay characters often were framed as being “just like straights” in order to further acceptance. With characters as baldly awful as the ones in The Woman in Red, it’s a disservice to blend in with them.

Previously in Gay Best Friend

pre stonewall

post stonewall

1990s and the 2000s

the now