Drag Race RuCap: "LalapaRuza Smackdown Reunited"
Wednesday, April 16, 2025 at 4:30PM
Cláudio Alves in Drag Queens, Drag Race, Dua Lipa, LGBTQ+, Liza Minnelli, MTV, Michelle Visage, RuPaul, RuPaul's Drag Race, TV, Ts Madison, Whitney Houston

Let Bruno's behind bless you with its beauty.

CLÁUDIO ALVES: Like last year, the LalapaRuza Smackdown is a season highlight. The format is simple enough, but it works because it puts drag skills at the forefront while also allowing for a pseudo-reunion that’s more about celebrating artistry in a sisterly way rather than airing out insecurities and the same old mess as before. For season 17, the producers were extra smart, shooting this lip sync extravaganza after most episodes had aired, allowing for growth and the queens’ honest reactions to how they’ve been portrayed and received. If the battles weren’t as spectacular as what we got with Megami, Morphine, and company, the final result was enough to make up for whatever deficiencies the reality TV hour might have had. The right person won, and the entire thing was edited around her journey across three drag duels. So, by the end, you really felt a sense of closure, of victory, of the best that Drag Race can offer.

NICK TAYLOR: It was such a fun episode! You’re not wrong exactly about no one topping last season’s LaLaPaRuZa finale, and nobody brought the drama of a surprise narrative like Megami, but the sheer quality of performance from almost everyone was so delightful to watch. A few of these battles could have been double shantays, which I wouldn’t say about almost any of the season 16 matchups. And fuck, everyone looked great...

As the episode begins, we get a montage of the queens lip syncing throughout the season. Ru’s voiceover reminds us that this episode will be the newly-annual tradition of the Lip Sync LaLaPaRuZa between the eliminated queens. In an amazing bit of economy, Ru isn’t even in werkroom to greet the season 17 cast when they come bounding through the doors. The top 4 lead the way arms-in-arms as their sisters bustle in behind them, so excited to be back on set with their buddies and showcase their talents.

You might expect a little more of the top 4 basking in their status, and they receive their fair share of praise and questioning from their sisters, but we get two points of attention immediately afterwards. Given the year in between the previous episode and this week’s conversations, I have to imagine there was some restaging of hot goss and buried hatchets for the audience. Still, the vibes in the room and the camera-ready exuberance of the queens go a long way to making it feel real. The first, of course, is Kori and Lydia becoming an official couple after they finished filming the first chunk of the season. They’re still so cute together, and both are immensely grateful for the online fervor they’ve received as lip sync assassins and A-grade lovebirds. 

The second is Suzie’s disappointment over missing the finale at the last second, which she’s put behind her. Actually watching the episode made it understandable to her, and good on her for getting that closure - may it help faggots like me chill out. Miss Toot still has a fire under her ass to prove herself. She also has a visceral reaction upon seeing Kori Toot live and in color, which might be the best part of the episode. This bitch *screams* in terror. Should they remake Us with Kori as Suzie’s tethered, or Silence of the Lambs where Suzie is trapped in Kori’s creepy dungeon? So many possibilities.

CLÁUDIO: I’m saying it now - Kori would have won the LalapaRuza if she had performed as Kori Toot. But please, no more Kori Jackson or Shrek King. And let’s not even speak about Kori Rogers and Kori Grinch - I may need to seek therapy to overcome the sheer horror of those sights, complete with possessed Mickey Mouse voice. Regarding a movie, I don’t see why these gals couldn’t do a drag version of Persona, or go back to the 1920s Suzie loves so much and star in a Lady of the Night remake - this time, it’s two Toots instead of two Norma Shearers. Weren’t there plans to do a more racially diverse version of Single White Female? Let’s get these queens cast instead of whatever ingenue is going for the part. Then again, since Kori and Lydia are a respectable pair of lesbians who have adopted Suzie as their biracial child, maybe The Bad Seed? So many possibilities.

Anyway, silliness aside, there are some serious moments in these pre-smackdown moments. We get a glimpse of maturity from Arrietty as she personally apologizes to Onya, something that might be just for the benefit of the cameras since these bitches have seen each other a lot in the past year, promo tour included. Nevertheless, there seems to be something genuine about the formality, and I think it provides a bit of that aforementioned closure, too. Many queens also talk about wanting to rudeem themselves, Lucky Starr most of all, which is only logical since our cardboard queen was the first out. Lana, who still thinks she’s a lip sync assassin rather than a lip sync survivor, feels the pressure after winning three duels, while Lydia wants the world to forget her scissoring mishaps.

Also, Crystal would like to let you know that she loves the Anastasia Beverly Hills glosses, specifically the shade of pink ginger. Product placement who? What? Where? Not here! 

NICK: All of those movie ideas are brilliant. The product placement is so conspicuous it’s practically winking at the camera. What’s even funnier than that is the handful of queens who simply are not the stars of this episode. We probably see as little of the Slaysian Diva of LA as the edit can afford, and we get even less of Hormona Lisa. Did she even have a confessional dialogue before the challenge started? Acacia’s in about as much of this as she was for every previous episode she competed in, so who knows how much to read into that.

After the stakes have been set, we arrive at the main stage. Ru comes out wearing her White Walker contacts, something either she or Raven may have stolen directly from Jewels. I know I liked her outfit when I saw it, but all I can remember are those eyes. Michelle and TS Madison look fabulous, though the biggest surprise of the judge’s panel is when we hear Bruno’s voice for the first time - man’s accent is as thick as the rest of him. 

A couple season 16 queens have groused (mostly in jest) about not getting a year to show how they’ve improved their drag for their own LaLaPaRuZa, and you know what? Fair. From makeup to padding, this whole crew walks out with improved finesse and the lustrous sheen begotten by more expensive drag. The questions of taste and subjectivity and whatever still apply, but the glow-ups are noticeable. Hormona looks the best she has all season. Arrietty looks hot. Suzie looks hot. Lana’s colors and angles in her silhouette are so fun - what a hat! - and Lydia looks more polished than ever while still maintaining her eccentricity. Did any looks stand out to you, for better or worse?

CLÁUDIO: Well, we’ll get to discuss the looks as they pertain to the lip syncs and a lot of them are built for reveals, so I’ll get to them later. I guess one can say outright that these gals are too obvious about their strategy, especially the ones basically wearing tents at the start of this showdown. I’m looking at you, frilly Hormona, and circus-y Suzie, and satin-smooth, curly-haired Acacia.

I would, however, like to say some words about the top four. Lexi looks the best of them, a dream of beige and sparkles and wirework making her up to be a slutty fairy. It’s very in keeping with the Love brand while sidestepping direct fashion references and providing a softer idea of who Lexi can be and embody in her drag. Onya does a direct reference to Doechii’s Thom Browne at the Grammys and I’m sad to say that, while I like the idea, the execution of those panniered trousers left a lot to be desired. Jewels is perfect, a collector’s Barbie whose look is cute but not especially complicated, the ideal getup to sit on a couch and comment on her sisters’ excellence while exuding top four energy. Only Sam outright disappoints, sporting a self-referential ensemble, covered in images of herself. It’s a fine approach, but the two-piece doesn’t look grand enough for a finalist presenting themselves as a potential winner. I guess one can say the same about Jewels, but there’s a space-taking quality to her fashion that overrides the lack of more obnoxious opulence.

What did you think of the finalists’ fashions?

NICK: My very favorite thing is how much room Lexi’s outfit takes up - she’s got that shit draped across about a third of the couch, and it’s so fun seeing her toss it back onto the furniture after she leaps up to welcome whichever poor soul walked back into the werkroom. Jewels looks fabulous, with the headgear and fun ornamentations making her look like a one-of-a-kind collectible. Onya also gets points for taking up space, though I share your criticisms of her outfit. We’ve talked about you pining for her Divine-esque warpaint eyebrows, and although it was fun seeing her do normal woman brows, the warpaint is missed. All I remember about Sam is her very P!nk-style wig, which makes her look even older than she did last week.

RuPaul then commands Bruno to spin the golden bingo hall turnstile, and the LaLaPaRuZa begins. First on the chopping block is Hormona Lisa, who is absolutely furious about this. Before she can say anything, Ru announces Hormona can select either her opponent or the song she will be performing to, allowing Bruno’s golden balls to divine who will face her. Hormona chooses “Liza with a Z”, much to the chagrin of Suzie Toot - we get as much time watching Hormona ponder her choices as we get of Suzie begging to lip sync to her favorite number on Ru’s playlist. Alas, it’s Lydia Butthole Kollins who's chosen to go against Hormona.

There’s some tension going into the battle, and while I wouldn’t say it’s Lydia’s finest hour, she wins the match pretty handily. Part of it is Hormona panicking and doing all her reveals way too fast, with no rhyme or reason behind it. Her waist is cinched as fuck, but when she reveals her magnificent bob it’s almost helpless. Lydia gives good face, modulating to the song’s tricky lyrics and Liza’s playful performance. She’s having fun, and she’s happy to do her goofy reveal of a conehead-style structure under her wizard’s hat. The multiple cutaways to Suzie energetically lipsyncing from the stands suggests she would have devoured either of them. 

CLÁUDIO: On the one hand, I would have done the same as Hormona and picked the song rather than my opponent. On the other hand, she was clearly planning on doing ruveals galore and “Liza with a Z” just isn’t that kind of song. In some ways, it felt like Miss Lisa gave up the second Bruno exposed Butthole’s ball to the camera, so she did all her ruveals at once as she knew there wouldn’t be a second lip sync to showcase them. Even so, the bit with the bob was fun, though Lydia handily won with her crazy face and conehead glamour. Indeed, her entire getup was fabulous in its star-spangled velvet, quirky but not messy. Love seeing a pink loofa battle out against the sorcerer’s apprentice.

So, Lydia wins and goes to the second round while Hormona is sent back to the Werkroom. Nobody seems especially surprised by this outcome, unlike what we’ll see down the line. The biggest gag is Hormona pretending to be mad as she reunites with her top four sisters, before breaking into her usual smiles and good vibes. Next, Bruno fishes out Suzie’s ball. Without Liza to select, she decided to pick her opponent rather than the song, going with Joella. It’s a smart choice since, for all intents and purposes, the Tooter seemed ready for any of the tunes thrown at her. Not that the slaysian queen knew that. To be sure, she tries to stump her adversary with Dua Lipa’s “Training Season,” believing that’s not in Suzie’s wheelhouse - well, the joke’s on her.

Because Suzie Toot demolishes this performance, trouncing Joella so decidedly that I was expecting to see blood on the floor. The LA diva tries and has some real fun facial expressions, but there’s no stopping the tap-dancing sensation when she decides to forego the tap shoes and serve sex instead. Suzie reminded me of no one more than Manilla, performing the song in a fashion closer to acting than interpretative dancing, almost flirting with the judges and the camera as she enjoyed the taste of the lyrics on her mouth. Whatever doubts there might have been go out the window once the Rose the Reiveter pierrot ruveals a rodeo clown getup with a Chappel Roan red wig to complete the look. Suzie looks so hot, and she knows how to work the Americana sexiness to her advantage. Every movement and gesture feel purposeful, every twirl a new chance to show off the kinetic quality of the costume with its red and white fringe. 

The best part is the werkroom reaction, so effusive that even Lexi seems to let go of her insecurities and becomes a Suzie Toot stan for the night. It’s a knockout and, just like that, Joella is out of the running for the title of Queen of She Did Already Done Had Herses.

NICK: Joella can at least comfort herself with being the immortality of her quilted runway, which might very well win her the Golden Boot and whatever sense of superiority comes from having the most iconic runway of your season, regardless of whether it’s “good”. Joella is fairly good-natured about being knocked out of the competition, though she has some choice reads for Suzie the second she sits back down in the werkroom. Just because she’s the second elimination of the season doesn’t mean she can’t needle a bitch.

The next queen selected by Bruno gorgeous, chiseled hands of fate is Lucky Starzzz, who’s wearing a headpiece comprised of three basketballs and a breastplate made of two. Remember the basketball Jaida Essence Hall dribbled down the runway for the basketball wives category of the Ball Ball? There she is! Lucky goes the same route as Hormona and picks her song, Whitney Houston’s “Step by Step”. It’s a great song, and Lucky trusts in her ability to perform it against such a fierce litany of possible contenders.

Acacia Forgot is chosen as her opponent, and we officially begin the portion of the LaLaPaRuZa where everyone knows how to put up a fight. Because Acacia and Lucky fuckin turn it. Lucky’s approach is very Nina Bo’Nina Brown, mixing the inherent absurdity of her club-kid getup while distilling the song’s essence, right down to a well-time reveal of her giant tiddies. Meanwhile, Acacia goes for camp and puss, particularly after she reveals a human unit under her giant frazzled wig before doing the stiffest death drop gag I’ve ever seen. She suddenly looks like Brooke Lynn Hytes, which is not something I ever expected to say about Acacia. It’s my favorite kind of lip sync battle, where both queens are evenly matched in diametrically different approaches to the song.

Ultimately, Ru declares Lucky the winner, a good choice I’m still not 100% sure I agree with? Lucky advancing prevents the LaLaPaRuZa from solely being a re-stamping of the bottom 5/middle 5 divide between the eliminated queens, but I worried if Lucky had any tricks besides the bouncing boobies. At least Acacia can boast two of the best losing performances of season 17. Girl’s got talent.

CLÁUDIO: Loved this duel to the point I wish we had a double shantay. While Acacia takes a bit too long to remove her costume at the back of the stage, she also delivers the best gag of the episode by far with that Megami-esque parody of a dip. I can’t entirely fault Ru for choosing Lucky as the victor, though. She taped into the fierceness of the song, delivering comedy without making herself the clown, no matter how ridiculous that basketball outfit may have looked - also, regarding Naysha Lopez’s latest complaints, fuck that noise. My only quibble is that, like you said, the costume leaves Lucky limited in her approach in a way that Acacia’s didn’t. I could perhaps see the Forgotten one delivering a more contrasting performance than the ballsy gal for the second round. But I’m getting ahead of myself, sorry.

Next, Bruno reveals Arrietty’s ball and, for once, I think it would have been smarter to pick the opponent rather than the song. Because, let’s be real, the elf queen would have an easier time against Crystal than the remaining lip sync assassins, Kori and Lana. But she, who looks ready for All Stars with her… enhanced visage, decides to use her power to pick P!nk’s “Blow Me (One Last Kiss).” That leaves lady luck to select her adversary, and it’s Kori Scott King’s time to impress, which she does. I’ve seen a lot of folks saying Arrietty won but I’m not here for such nonsense. Sure, she looked amazing and did a bunch of tricks. However, I never sensed her feeling the song in the same way Lydia’s wife did. Kori was giving face, living that pop cum rock fantasy. Arrietty felt slightly disconnected. 

That said, she did better than I was expecting and deserves to feel redeemed after this performance. My main issue is a question of timing the stunts, of marrying the angry facial expressions with the body language. Fashion-wise, she blows Kori out of the water, of course. Still, that’s not reason enough to have her continue to the second round and I’m glad Ru agreed.

NICK: We can always tell Naysha Lopez to fuck off with her hot air. Diva should be no one’s standard-bearer for anything about Drag Race except being sent home.

Anyways! I’ll cosign everything you said about this battle. Arrietty looked incredible, and I can understand the impulse to interpret this song as something angry and badass. P!nk’s got that oomph to her. Going hard on the anger proves a limiting approach as the song progresses, but Arrietty still dazzled. Her little twiddling of her fingers under her chin was a great little detail. She’s giving in a way I heretofore was not expecting from Arrietty, and much like Jan vs Silky in AS6, she wins so many points for putting up one hell of a fight in a hot black getup, but I agree Kori ultimately outshines her. Miss Scott King is as kinetic as she’s ever been, and she connects to the song’s palpable hurt without falling into a depressed/depressing performance. The bigger surprise is how many queens in the werkroom expected Arrietty to take it, though maybe it’s just editing. Either way, Kori wins the match, and Arrietty is rightly proud of redeeming herself.

Our last match of this round is also its only proper rematch: Snatch Game flops Lana and Crystal are back in the ring. Lana gets to pick the song, and she chooses Sylvester’s “You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real)”, previously featured on Drag Race when Bob the Drag Queen annihilated Derrick Barry. Crystal takes to the song better than Derrick did, getting down with her white self and performing a wig reveal into a unit less fitting of her outfit, for no heavenly reason. She also comes across in some stretches as trying to fill the time, throwing something silly at Ru to see what’ll amuse her. Crystal does a solid job, but Lana suggests no such stressors, and wins this match as succinctly as Bob did nine (NINE!!) years ago. She’s clearly having a ball, enjoying herself in a way we really haven't been able to see in her previous lip syncs. Her smooth dancing and flamingo poise are completely in service of inhabiting Sylvester’s teasing entendres and funky beats. It’s a marvelous performance. Lana fully redeems herself from being a lip sync survivor to an assassin, and much like Kori, she’s over the moon to hear RuPaul tell her she finally won something. It’s very unique for Lana.

CLÁUDIO: As ever, with Plasma and Luxx’s lovechild, I wish there was a bit more going on in her face during the lip syncs. Still, you’re right that she gets the general vibe of the song better than Crystal, who I thought was stronger than you seem to feel. Indeed, I almost wonder if Miss Envy might have taken this had Lana picked another song or had she be given the right to do so herself. They do put on a nice show, spicing things up with a bit of pantomimed kai kai with the nepo baby as the unlikely top. I must say this - I adored Lana’s outfit and Crystal’s wasn’t too shabby either, though I wish it were any other color. Nice to see good fashion during a LalapaRuza.

It may sound insane considering all the other queens on this season, but I’m probably most excited to see Crystal back on All Stars. She feels like the one that has the most to show us, still. While not shortchanged by production, season 17 seems to have only scratched the surface of what she can deliver. Then again, she sounded like she was having a stroke, fumbling her exit line multiple times, so maybe this stage isn’t the best platform for the gal.

And that’s it for round one.

The next phase in the competition starts with Lucky’s ball getting fondled by our resident golden god and, like last time, the basketball babe chooses the song rather than the opponent. She goes with Rihanna’s “We Found Love” and the drag gods deliver Suzie as the adversary she’ll have to trounce. Honestly, Lucky should have picked Lana instead of the tune because Miss Toot, once again, demolishes the competition. Don’t get me wrong, the season’s porkchop is fantastic, but her performance feels like too much a repeat of the Whitney Houston lip sync. Suzie, for her part, has varied her approach a great deal. She’s not so much going for sex as she’s projecting lovesickness and comedy, making fun of Lucky’s predictable boob jiggle and bringing the stanky leg to the Drag Race stage. Kori was gagged while I was having Megami vs Mhi’ya flashbacks. She’s a smart cookie, that Suzie and she’s right to feel proud of herself.

NICK: Oh, wouldn’t this have been a great song for Kori and Lydia to do? It would’ve been too real, and that’s what makes it special. As you said, Lucky does fairly well, though it’s rough to see her lift her shirt almost as soon as the song starts and realize this is as far as the bit goes. I’d half expected her to release something from her tiddies like Asia O’Hara, but alas. Suzie trounces her, staying as light on her feet as she was against Joella while, as you say, delivering a very different presentation. Her versatility alone could’ve given Suzie the win against Lucky’s familiar approach, as would luring her opponent into rushing upstage to do a split while does her stanky leg. I also cannot emphasize enough how hot she looks. Insane Clown Pussy the house down boots. Shoot me. Anyways.

This leaves Lydia, Lana, and Kori in a threesome scored to Charli XCX’s “360”. Every single queen makes this joke, with the best version being either Sam pouting about not being the Kingdom’s plus one or Lana flatly stating “I know I’m third wheeling here” in her confessional. The star couple seem nervous about facing each other again, but are resolute that one of them will make it to the finale and take it all.

When the three queens start the song with similar robotic motions, it’s clear they’ve all had a brat summer to dance the fuck out of this. All of them bring tremendous energy, using the entirety of the stage to their advantage. Lydia starts rough, with a scissors callback moment Ru either fails to notice or just doesn’t find amusing. We get a cutaway of Michelle doing an awkward smile, which might as well be a funeral bell, but Butthole gives great face to her performance throughout. I underestimated her on first watch, but she’s a hoot. 

Lana’s limited expressiveness fits the song’s autotuned emotions pretty ideally. She’s a party girl dancing with her besties, and she makes the protracted removal of her miniskirt into a tantalizing spectacle. Love the grin on her face throughout, and how her wig gets a little disheveled at the end - Lana Ja’Rae was getting her life on that stage. Last and most certainly not least is Kori King, who simply never stops moving once the song starts. Her Monet reference really proved resonant for her lip syncing style. As with season 10’s sponge queen, Kori’s able to do a lot in a way that never feels reckless or uncontained. The pose for the camera shutters, the choreo, the way she rolls her eyes so coquettishly at the first “I’m so Julliard ~”, it’s a feat to even maintain the level of movement she’s doing here, let alone to add so many embellishments. Lana and Lydia accidentally concluding with the same motions on either side of Kori cements them as her backup dancers, and though it’s a tight race, Kori takes it home.

CLÁUDIO: You are psychotic for wishing for more “Asia O’hara’s boob surprise” from a queen. Didn’t those bugs suffer enough? 

Generally speaking, I hate three-way lip syncs on Drag Race since the edit rarely works to anyone’s benefit. This is maybe the best of the various ménages á trois we’ve seen on the show, in part because the contestants seem to perform mostly at the same level while serving different approaches. Backstage, the other queens are quick to summarize the strengths of each of them. Lana is sexy, her inexpression an asset in this case, as if suggesting a slightly dazed girl getting her life at the club. Lydia is all about the face, the way she turns awkwardness into a fierce spectacle, all about going between goofiness and a locked-in connection with her audience. The bitch was eye-fucking the panel. And Kori is a hoot and a half, having the most fun of the trio while also delivering the most memorable dance moves. It’s all about what Ru wanted at the time and it seems she was hungry for some big-titted silliness that day.

This leaves us with a final smackdown of Kori vs Suzie, the two Tooters facing off to the delight of the audience at home, the judges, and their sisters, too. The latter are invited back to the main stage so they can witness this battle in the flesh. And make no mistake, this is a battle. Not that either of these bitches will let you see them sweat.

The song is “APT” by ROSÉ, featuring Bruno Mars, a playful tune whose origin is a drinking game between friends. Suzie hones on that tone and attacks it like nobody’s business, eschewing the intense sex appeal of her first performance and the broader comedy of the second. She’s effervescent up there, asking the audience to come along for the fun and feel the sheer joy she’s embodying. Kori is less bubbly, going for a harder approach that culminates in a titty ruveal that would have worked better had she put some pasties on those girls or stopped covering the nipples in a parody of demureness. Not to be outshined, Suzie takes the opportunity to make her adversary’s stunt into a joke in which she compares her smaller chest to the silicone bosom bouncing around over Kori’s lesbian pride costume. In some ways, our King does more, but the Tooter captures the vibe of the song better. Either win would have felt justified, but my vote would fall on Missy BFA.

Ru agrees and Suzie wins fifty grand, courtesy of Starbucks. This means that, unless they have a runner-up prize, Florida’s third LalapaRuza winner in a row ends the season with the biggest cash prize outside of the overall victor. That’s not nothing! 

NICK: The moments where Suzie and Kori dance together - either when they accidentally synchronize or lock eyes and match movements - are genuinely joyous. They’re both pretty bubbly to me, but I see what you mean about Suzie seeming a little looser than Kori. Still, both approaches translated for me, and had Kori delivered a more satisfying payoff to her breastplate reveal I think she could’ve taken it. Most importantly, I’m very happy for all the lesbians who felt seen and represented by this match-up - maybe we can synthesize this energy to get a lesbian contestant next year?

For the third time tonight (or fourth, if we include her sidelined performance of the Liza number) Suzie cinches her victory with assured skill. Frankly, I think Ru should’ve offered her a choice between the $50k or a slot in the finale - and she should’ve done it for Morphine last year too. Tootsie Scooter reigns supreme as the main character of season 17, getting one last victory over the haters and losers before our final four takes the stage. 

Kori King can at least take comfort in her man, her litany of insane Cameo characters, her fealty to the superior coffee chain Dunkin’ Donuts, and her reigning status as the internet’s breakout favorite of the season. She gave a great run for it, and as you said near the top, she might’ve won if she revealed a Kori Toot wig and done some stupid shit onstage. Still, the Kingdom should be proud of her work tonight. I’m so impressed, and I look forward to seeing how she grows.

CLÁUDIO: Hear! Hear! May the Kingdom be blessed and may the Tooters feel vindicated. What a fun episode this was. We can only hope that the season 17 finale lives up to it, no matter the queen that holds the bedazzled scepter at the end of it all. I’m rooting for Onya, but a Jewels win wouldn’t be a miss. Sam would be the least satisfying victor for me, and I feel Lexi is better positioned to dominate an All Stars someday. But ask me next week and I might have a different take. See you then. Toodles.

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