Hero of the Year
Jeremy Renner, Anthony Mackie & Brian Geraghty
THE HURT LOCKER
| "Carl Frederickssen"
Ed Asner & animators
|"Wikus Van Der Merwe"
| Blessed with: Bravery (though 'everyone's a coward about something'), camarederie and day in/day out perserverance. Achilles Heel: Shoddy supplies, adrenalie addiction. Triumph: Saving lives.
||Blessed with: Stubborn determination, the love of a good woman, empathy, quick thinking and adventurous spirit. Achilles Heel: Grumpy. Has trouble letting go. Triumph: Let's go. That scene where he empties the house? *Sob*
||Blessed with: Immense paternal love, general human empathy, quick wits and survival instincts. Achilles Heel: Deep wells of sadness. That and the apocalyptic malnutrition. Triumph: His Boy lives on.
||Blessed with: Strength, agility, fearlessness. He's also a quick study. Achilles Heel: Those military apron strings. Selfish desire to get his legs back... "his real legs!" Triumph: Saves a world, gets the girl, tames the dragon.
||Blessed With: inner humanity, especially once the outer humanity fails him. Achilles Heel: Prejudice. Triumph: Helps an alien nation return to their world. Otherwise, things turn out pretty grim for him.
|Gold: CARL FREDERICKSEEN Silver: FATHER Bronze: WIKUS
Finalists: Coraline for CORALINE | Sam Worthington as "Marcus" in TERMINATOR SALVATION was there until Wikus and jakesully bested him in the find-your-humanity-by-losing-it sweepstakes | Ellen Page as "Bliss" from WHIP IT. Self actualization. In short and to borrow the tagline: she becomes her own hero.
Semi-Finalists: Tony Leung as "Zhou You" in RED CLIFF | Morgan Freeman as "Nelson Mandela" in INVICTUS | There were a lot more heroices onscreen this year but did so many of them have to be so blank, so glum or two dimensional in their characterizations?
Villain of the Year
| "Colonel Hans Landa"
|"The Fabrication Machine"
Art Kimbro (and KNB EFX Group)
DRAG ME TO HELL
Teri Hatcher (and animators)
| Guilty of: Show off superiority, mass murder, cat-like love of torturing prey, intimidation and manipulations. Accomplices: the Nazis. Sentence: He never gets to take off that uniform now, does he?
|| Guilty of: Genocide, unlimited arms race fever. Accomplices: Only those it creates and they are legion. Sentence: Implosive defeat. Though who knows what happened at the end of this movie. Do you?
|| Guilty of: Pure evil, fear mongering, animal sacrifice and goat possession. Accomplices: Gypsy women with foul tempers and poor oral hygiene. Sentence: Unknown. Presumably still torturing the deamned in Hell.
||Guilty of: Child abuse (every variety thereof). Plus: Welfare-cheating, chain-smoking, slothful poisonous rage. Accomplices: Mostly herself. Skilled at self-absolving pity and rationalization. Sentence: Isolation.
|| Guilty of: Lies, child abuse, deceitful illusions, kidnapping, macabre soul stealing and unlicensed attempts at ocular surgery. Accomplices: Other Father, rats. Sentence: Loss of the game... and her bony hand; trapped in a well.
|Gold: OTHER MOTHER Silver: HANS LANDA Bronze: MARY JONES
Finalists: Tae-Ju (Ok-Bin Kim) from THIRST. Havoc making vampiress but I sufficently awarded her for acting already | Iron Maven (Juliette Lewis) in WHIP IT. But more of a bad girl with heart than a true villain | Colonel Miles Quaritch (Stephen Lang) from AVATAR. A smidgeon too cartoonishly broad for me but I love that claw scar.
Semi-Finalists: Boggis, Bunce & Bean from FANTASTIC MR. FOX had their own theme song | Gallaxher from MONSTERS VS. ALIENS had his moments.
Diva of the Year
Worship their fabulousity
Sacha Baron Cohen
A SINGLE MAN
|"Countess Sofya Tolstoy"
THE LAST STATION
| Turn ons: Do you really want me to type all that up? Pass. Hobbies: Public scenes, public sex, seeking global fame. Enablers: Lutz, Paula Abdul, Ron Paul and assorted other dumbasses. Turn offs: Carbs.
||Turn ons: Gay men, dirty jokes, gin. Hobbies: Dressing up fabulousity, drinking, self-pity, living in the past. Enablers: George, Tanqueray. Turn offs: Reality (aging, grief, sexual orientation, divorce, etcetera)
||Turn ons: Beautiful costumes, finished scripts, Guido (albeit in the past tense) Hobbies: Acting, making fabulous entrances, loving Guido in her very unusual way. Enablers: Global fanbase. Turn offs: Winging it on set.
||Turn ons: "jakesully" and Eywa (but not in that order), clean kills, the Tree of Souls, men with huge... dragons. Hobbies: hunting, banshee flying, spreading the gospel of Eywa Enablers: Mom and Dad (i.e. the Na'Vi royals) Turn offs: Liars, humans.
||Turn ons: Leo Tolstoy, the massive family estate, mating calls Hobbies: Hissy fits, plate breaking, eavesdropping Enablers: She's losing them rapidly. Turn offs: Zealots, everyone who worships her husband (i.e. the competition)
Gold: COUNTESS SOFYA TOLSTOY Silver: BRUNO Bronze: CLAUDIA
Semi-Finalists: "Chéri and Lea" (Rupert Friend and Michelle Pfeifffer) were once divas. But perhaps divas should never fall in love with other divas... the powers dissipate. There can be only one. | "Jenny" (Carey Mulligan) lack only AN EDUCATION in several ways. She's a diva-in-training.
Sexpot of the Year
| "Alex Goran"
UP IN THE AIR
A SINGLE MAN
|"Chéri & Lea"
Rupert Friend & Michelle Pfeiffer
| Flirts like a champ, texts like a horndog, and kicks up her heels with great party girl spontaneity. Who wouldn't be snookered?
George to Carlos "You have an incredibly face. Enjoy that. It's a gift."
George then hands him a $20. This gift is totally underpriced.
|He's hot for teacher. She's obsessed with student. Their love is doomed but their shared cruel icy beauty is stunningly hot match.
|| I'll never forget her emergence from those pristine white sheets. If Cruz gets any hotter movie theaters are going to burn down. This movie speaks true: Even blind men stroke her picture!
||Clive's always been dangerously sexy but now adds humor to the mix. Whether he's faking an accent to seduce easy prey or sparring with his equal (Roberts) he's a movie dream.
Gold: LENA Silver: ALEX GORAN Bronze: CARLOS
Semi-Finalists: "Prince Albert" (Rupert Friend) in THE YOUNG VICTORIA -Christ, Vicki, just marry him already. He's perfect. | "Shawn" (Channing Tatum) is good at FIGHTING. And taking his shirt off | "Andrew" (Ryan Reynolds) how did THE PROPOSAL not involve a must-have-sex-with-me clause? Maybe Margaret Tate wasn't such a good businesswoman after all.
| (500) DAYS OF SUMMER
||UP IN THE AIR
||WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE
| "This is not a love story. This is a story about love."
||"Be careful what you wish for."
||"Once upon a time in Nazi occupied France."
||"The story of a man ready to make a connection."
|| "There's one in all of us."
Gold: WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE Silver: CORALINE Bronze: INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
Semi-Finalists: IN THE LOOP "Things are about to spin out of control." | IT'S COMPLICATED "Divorced... with benefits."
Best Poster Design
||PRECIOUS||WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE
|The first image released, a couple rutting in a tree of dead souls, was arresting enough. The sick scissor poster once the word was out? Genius.
||The scifi allegory made great use of signage and logos for its campaign, memorable marking the tense alien/human divide and likely violence to come.
||The circular motif is an obvious one for the title but the optical illusion surface and the offcenter framing is perfect for this disoriented spaceman.
||The abuse centric teaser featured a body cracked by a malevolent hand. The second was softer but stunning. Precious is a work in progress. You can see the brush strokes.
||Posters should reflect a film's mood and texture (as well as selling it) and this works on both counts. All that mnemonic fur. Instant childhoold recall.
Gold: ANTICHRIST Silver: PRECIOUS Bronze: WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE
Semi-Finalists: TERMINATOR: SALVATION (the one with the fiery-eyed skull) | AN EDUCATION (upside down couple) romantic and glossy.