True Blood: As exhausting as it is to hate Vampire Bill, we're still doing it...
Tuesday, August 19, 2014 at 11:14AM Adam Armstrong is like our own TV grim reaper counting down to "True Blood"'s True Death. Only one episode to go before it's all over for the fang-bangers! Adam has dispensed with narrative tissue and is just train-of-thoughting it now in the homestretch... I'll join Adam next week for the series wrap. - Nathaniel
Episode 7.8 "Almost Home"
I’m done. I’m done. I’m done. You know, in the beginning of the episode, while Bill was pouring his unbeating heart out to Sookie, I thought to myself, I’m tired of hating Bill. It’s become too exhausting. Look at him, his voice cracking and all. Okay, I can get behind him and Sookie ending up together. Even if it’s just easier and requires less strain on my brain than remembering why I hate him.
AND THEN THE EPISODE ENDED THE WAY IT DID.
I hate him again!
I don’t want the blood.”
Oh, you don’t Bill Compton? You don’t want the antidote? [more...]
You want a silver spike you can sit on and martyr fuck yourself into oblivion? Jesus, I’ll lube the spike up myself. Fuck Bill.
• Otherwise, was anybody else thrown 100% for a loop when Jessica and Jason were having their bonding moment in the car and thought, Oh good, the hottest couple in the show is getting back together. All is right in Bon Temps only to have them FRIEND ZONE each other? I don’t get it. I just…don’t.
• Also, Violet’s death was a little premature for all the build up, no?
• Is Tara really not coming back from the dead? Don’t get me wrong, Letti Mae’s forgiveness was touching and all, but is Terra’s storyline really caput? That’s her contribution to the final season? Psh give me lesbian boxing Terra any day over this poltergeist purgatorial bullshit.
• I’m mixed on the whole Jessica/Hoyt reunion. On the one hand it’s a bittersweet lovers reunion in the vain of Eternal Sunshine. On the other hand, can Jessica really be with him knowing the only reason he’s with her is because she glamoured him? Interesting nonetheless.
• Ugh, I hope Jason does not end up with Brigette. It’ll just be a little too neat and clean and convenient.
Episode 7.9 "Love is To Die"
• I change my mind. Brigette can stay. When her and Jason were laying in bed without even diddling each other one bit? Gah, was that cute and shit. I’ll allow it.
• Also, in regards to Jessica and Hoyt, loved the juxtaposition of Jason’s explanation of their relationship while they’re fucking for the first time in years, and for the first time that Hoyt can remember. Just wonderful.
• Wow. I wish MY at-home blonde hair dye jobs came out as perfectly as Sarah Newlin’s.
• Do you remember in Titanic when Leo and Kate are scrambling up the boat as it’s sinking, before the splitting, and they’re running into a bit of bottleneck foot traffic? The priest dude is saying a prayer aloud about walking in the valley of shadows and death, and Leo’s like, “How bout you walk a little faster to that valley?” I just want to interject Leo’s line every time Bill finishes speaking about his profound choice of death over life. DO IT ALREADY.
• Now, this is all well and good, but I think we all know what this episode/series was really leading up to. In a scene, True Blood was able to find its beating heart & throbbing cock & pussy lips…
gifs via this tumblr
GINGER & ERIC: (Save the date!)
Even if their coital union was almost as anticlimactic as Violet’s death in the previous episode, at least it was true to their characters, who they are and more believable than anytime Sookie was penetrated by Warlow(do you remember when that was a thing?)
• All in all, while this episode was poignant in spots, at least for me, the first portion of Pam’s line in the opening scene summed my feelings up perfectly:
As much as I appreciate a compelling character drama…”
• I really am enjoying all the characters interacting with one another, it’s just a damn shame they don’t have an adversary worthy of their final season.
P.S. What with Sam FINALLY leaving and Bill hopefully on the way out in the final episode, all of my dreams for the show are coming true!
P.P.S. HOW READY ARE YOU FOR THE SERIES' TRUE DEATH THIS WEEKEND?
TV, True Blood, sex scenes, vampires
Reader Comments (14)
I've been rewatching the earlier seasons and wow, there's a huge difference. All of the characters were fully formed and their storylines were handled in an interesting way. Alan Ball leaving destroyed this show.
Tara's death and bizarre ghost appearances are the weirdest ever. That's what you do to a main character??!!
Can we talk about Violet's sex dungeon?
I'm here for Jessica/Hoyt. Well done by both actors and great payoff for their characters. Too bad one or both can still die a horrible death next week probably.
I will say I already miss the show, which is interesting since the show still has 1 episode left. I am still hoping bill dies and they shoot forward and year and sookie and Eric are together as I always wanted. Who else could she be with? She will read their mind and hate them instantly. Do her and Eric makes sense and screw bill in his self loathing ways.
Anne Marie - For god's sake, the penis brander! Gahhh.
This final season really is like watching a slow-motion car crash. The Jessica/Hoyt reunion and the Jason/Bridget bed scene were the only things I enjoyed in the past couple of weeks that didn't involve Pam. Well, and Eric/Ginger, which was hilarious even if it reeked of the worst kind of fan-baiting. I'm more than ready to say good-bye next week.
denny -- isn't fandering (my preferred word for it) what they've been doing ALL season.
Adam - The penis brander!! It's been two weeks and Violet is dead and gone and dissolved into goo, and I can't focus on anything from that episode but the penis brander! How the HELL did the show take a detour into 70s gore pron and why is nobody talking about it?
denny - I feel like "slow motion car crash" is such a strong term for this season. I'd say it's much more like slowly pulling out of a shotty parallel parking job. After being wedged against the absolute shittyness of Season 5 and parts of 6, it's slowly trying to pry its way out, all the while hitting itself on all sides.
Anne Marie - Perhaps everything I wrote about that episode should be deleted, and in its place just a picture of the penis brander. No caption necessary.
FANDERING!!!!!! Nathaniel, I LOVE this word. I want it to catch on like "sexposition" has.
Well, if i'm going to inflict some psychosexual torture on my enemies, I'd like to think that i would be wearing exactly what Violet had on. Props to the costuming department.
Yay for Ginger! But to honest, i would've been *done* as soon as Eric said "you and I are going to f--k."
I don't get why Terra had to die for that storyline to take place. "I'm sorry that I didn't commit murder when I was a child". Would Lettie Mae had been a better mother to Tara if Tara had killed her husband?
I'm mostly "ugh" when it comes to Bill but i found him wanting to "call on her" like an old Southern gentleman to be totally adorable.
I'll make a prediction for the finale that Sookie finally gets turned into a vamp (and then gets staked by one of Pam's stiletto heels)
Derreck. - "and then gets staked by one of Pam's stiletto heels"...lolz...yes, please.
I am so ready for this show to meet the true death. That episode was awful for a penultimate. Too much Jason and Brigette, their talks were sweet, but they didn't need THAT much time. And that's Sam's send off? Ugh. I would've rather listened to Eric and Sookie talk more. Ginger/Eric and Pam's one liners were the only saving grace.
Bia - Alan Ball leaving didn't destroy the show, Alan Ball did destroy the show. The new guy is just making sure it stays dead.
Brittani - You summed up my thoughts perfectly.