Morning Truth Tell: All Hospitals Need Thelma Ritter
Tuesday, September 3, 2013 at 10:02AM Don't be alarmed but I spent last night in the Emergency Room*. It won't surprise you to hear that they continue to be horrible nightmare places.
One woman had been there for 9 hours when we walked in and had yet to be treated. She was crying her eyes out and dizzy with 'is this real life? will i ever leave this room?' kind of existential despair. It did not bode well for the rest of the visit.
Because few things are treated like emergencies in emergency room, you're left waiting for hours for any kind of human interaction let alone problem solving. Your mind has plenty of time to wander (harmless and unavoidable) and horribilize (harmful and likely when you're in pain). I kept thinking of Thelma Ritter's "Clancy" . Sometimes all you need is someone to hear your out, put a hand on your shoulder, and talk you through it. Someone to fetch a distracted doctor with a prescription pad at least. Nobody was doing that!!! Every hospital needs a Thelma Ritter. Thirty of them, even, but they're in short supply.
Live this truth. Be your best Thelma Ritter for a loved one who needs you this week. Offer a firm kind hand and listening ear. When needed set your internal timer to redirect their self-pity if it gets out of hand. Be that steadying Supporting presence. You won't win an Oscar for it, true, but public adulation isn't everything. Private gratitude is also golden.
*I am fine. As you may have figured, I was playing the poor man's Thelma Ritter role in this scenario. It's harder than it looks!
Reader Comments (10)
Thelma Ritter, proto-Amy Adams.
There are but two ways to make sure you are quickly seen in the Emergency Room (aka the ninth circle of hell on earth):
1. Make lots of loud, "OH, the pain!" wailing noises. I learned this from my mother (a social worker who worked in a hospital for over a decade) and from my own personal experience with a dislocated shoulder. At the very, very least, it'll get you some pain meds right quick.
2. Say you are experiencing chest pains. They're obligated to take any sign of a heart attack seriously.
I really need to see With A Song in My Heart. Thelma Ritter is such a peach!
Nathan, please be well. I just caught a glimpse of How the West Was Won the other day, and didn't realize before that Thelma was in that. She's a champion wagon master in this one.
I love that in one day TCM had How the West Was Won, Le Havre (A 2011 film on TCM?!?!?!?), and Burden of Dreams on the schedule.
Love Thelma Ritter. She lived near me in Forest Hills for many years and I used to see her at the supermarket.
CMG, thank God for TCM. I finally saw Anna and the King of Siam on Saturday night and was blown away by both Irene and Rex. They both killed it. And Gale Sondergaard...wow. What a lovely movie. I also appreciated how the story differed from the musical.
Wow! I should tell potential employers my nickname is Clancy and maybe I will be hired on the spot as CNA/Sitter. Then maybe I can get a job on the spot out of the 80 applications I submitted, In the mean time, anyone need a home health adie. I;m certified and my licence is up to date. :)
Also what might help since mutiple oscar nominee Thelma does work. Go for the an Oscar Winner like Shirley MaClaine and scream. "GIVE MY FRIEND A SHOT!!!!!!!!!" Trust me that is something I would do. It would help if your friend ffeels the same about you, so when they are released the can either bail you out of jail or come visit you in the psych. ward for causing a scene.
And occasionally you need a little sarcastic quip about the other overdramatic denizens of the waiting room. That's the Thelma I'd need.
True story:
This one doctor told me once in the Emergency Room that Emergency doesn't stand for fast or quick, but that it refers to being available 24/7. All that without me having asked or complained about anything, and on his best straight face. Luckily, he wasn't a heart surgeon nor I needed one.