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best of 2014 -- any fycs?

YEAR IN REVIEW

ANY FYCS ?
 
"LINE READING: Chris Pine's "I was raised to be charming, not sincere" is an instant classic, and should be studied by actors playing that role for years to come.
-Colin

"BEST MUSICAL SEQUENCE IN A NON-MUSICAL: Hilary Swank in The Homesman tries to woo a suitor with homemade dinner and a song. So delicate and heartbreaking." - Cameron

"BEST CAMEO: Ben Affleck's Penis." -J. Garner

 

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Saturday
Mar082014

Drag Race: Big Opening Pt 2

Sorry this is so many days late! I promised we'd play along this year. And by play along I don't mind dress up in drag while typing but you can't see me so you'll never know but weekly posts on the best reality show on television (the Emmys sure are missing the boat float with their exceedingly conventional and stale nominations). Unfortunately "The Big Opening Part 2" which brough us another set of 7 queens, was much less cinematic in its shout-outs, so I made one up myself: Darienne Lake and June Squibb have the same designer. Pass it on!

 

Oh. my. god. Revelation as I typed: June Squibb would make the best Guest Judge on this show. Make that happen, Ru.

Not that no queens were compared to queens of the screen. Milk was told to "flash that Lauren Hutton smile" and Trinity K Bonet decided to go with 'something between Star Wars and Buckingham Palace for her look, citing Princess Leia as inspiration. The actual runway look skipped that generation and went straight for Princess Amidala. It worked for the judges.  

Did Raquel inspire Joslyn?

Josyn Fox was compared to Raquel Welch. Well the hair color and the fondness for animal prints...  Joslyn's extremely short skirt that ends up leaving nothing to the imagination gives Jocelyn the best deadpan line of the episode. Where's the bottom of your dress?

It wouldn't fit in my suitcase."

The mini-challenge was a sexy/silly bedroom lust/pillow fight combo with the Pit Crew. Isn't it odd that the queens rarely get into it with the Pit Crew in their photoshoots. They seem scared to touch them, which makes little sense. They are obviously there to be used and abused, like oily android toys without voice boxes or sentience.


Courtney Act and Milk have eyes for each other

LET'S HAVE A KIKI KAIKAI?
When the boys de-drag, Milk thinks Courtney Act is super cute and Courtney says she doesn't do dairy but will make an exception (and, yes, Milk is gorgeous out of drag). Grrrls, keep it in your pants and tucked. This isn't The Real World

BRAIN CELL MURDERER
Gia Gunn's one word vocabulary terrified us last week and this week Joslyn takes up the mantle with a giggle, completing misunderstanding the "15" number in her Quinceañera dress-up box and then referring to herself as "the black horse of the competition" (Poor thing). 

BEST READ
Despite Bianca Del Rio's quick wit and amusing description of her "Rolodex of Hate", it's actually RuPaul who pulls out the library card with a deadpan assessment of Jocelyn's Quincenera over the top gown.

Your couture reminds me of a wedding. something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue

...green
...yellow
...pink
...red
...chartreuse.

BEST JUDGE
Michelle Visage wins this by smartly grilling Magnolia and giving Joslyn Fox the best advice she'll get: 

You're beautiful. You don't need all of that. Cut it in half."

Whether or not Joslyn will take this to heart... or even understands the words in those sentences, we can't yet know. 

Bianca with the Pit Crew

DID THE RIGHT WOMAN WIN?
Yes, Bianca del Rio was great the whole episode, quick-witted, smart, and engaged in the competition. It'll be interesting to see her throw down with Ben de la Creme soon since they are both cut from the same clown queen cloth. 

LIPSYNCH FOR YOUR LIFE!
In the end Darienne Lake with her sparkly but drab green gown and Magnolia with her terrible attitude and cowprint dress must fight to stay on the show to the tune of "Turn the Beat Around". 

Each week I'll be doing a quick sketch from the show just for fun (maybe it won't always be from the lipsynch maybe it will?) This week's portrait gurl is Darienne Lake cuz that's what I paid for and she was giving me extra! 

SASHAY AWAY
...Magnolia and her frightening contoured-like-a-swordfish nose wasn't givin' any extra and we wanted our money back after her lackluster lipsynch so this was an easy call.

QUEEN OF SOCIAL MEDIA
Out of sociomedianthropological curiousity uhohheyyy  I screencapped all of the new queen's Twitter accounts a few weeks before the premiere to see how much of a difference a popular television show can make. Last week with a different set of queens, Adore Delano picked up the most adding 2,000 followers. Who connected with the most people this week? Biggest Gains (descending order):  Courtney Act: + 4,800 (though it's worth noting that having already been famous as the runner up on Australian Idol, she had many thousands more fans to begin with); Bianca: + 4,420; Milk: + 3960; Joslyn Fox: +1696; Darienne: + 1600, Trinity: + 1418; Magnolia: + 1255

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Reader Comments (12)

The best read for me was actually Courney Act's "Is this America's Next Top Model?'
Hilarious!

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHowler

Courtney Act is on some NEXT LEVEL drag shit. It's like competing on Project Runway and finding out Tom Ford is a contestant.

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDerreck.

Nat, You kill me. The "list-maker" in me loves, loves, loves that you're tracking individual drag queen Twitter following developments. /dead.

Magnolia got 1,255 new Twitter followers ... I guess that's part of what she wanted ultimately. I hope it was worth it for her!

And, Bianca ... probably the best RPDR queen to come after (or before) Sharon Needles. I'm going to relish watching her ascent to stardom.

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCinesnatch

Did anyone else notice that the brick wall is fake this season? It shakes when Ru opens and slams the door at the beginning of the episode; it's stretched fabric.

In my own recap, Joslyn Fox is now officially Joslyn Fox (bless her heart). I can't with her.

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRobert G

Robert G -- i don't get it? Joslyn is officially Joslyn?

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNathaniel R

Derreck -- but i don't really understand that. If drag was solely about "realness" than, yes. But other than looking like she is a woman and not remotely like a drag queen, what is special?(please to note: i know nothing about Australian Idol so maybe she is spectacular in every way)

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNATHANIEL R

Courtney Act is absolutely stunning.

But, Bianca has already got charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent (as well as grace and the ability to sew), and it's only episode two. If anyone is "Tom Ford" in Derreck's equation, it's Bianca.

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCinesnatch

These queens were sooo much better than those of the first episode!

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterPhilip H.

I guess i'm just captivated by Courtney's look, but i honestly see her going far, if not winning. I was totally living for her in that pillow fight photoshoot and she does have that c.u.n.t. combo in spades (but Cinesnatch is totally right in that Bianca has the upper hand with her ability to sew), plus, there's the whole singing stuff and i've seen a preview of at least two wonderful runway outfits she's going to wear on the show. Her brand of drag may not be as exaggerated as most but she seems to be the most put-together "fish" queen this show has ever had and i can get behind that.

I'm just happy that this season really has a more talented bunch than other seasons. I don't really see any real tragic cases like Jiggly Caliente or Serena Cha-Cha though Magnolia and her shitty attitude certainly makes her stand out. Seriously, at least Kelly Mantle actually wanted to be there. "Exposure"...ugh, bitch please.

March 8, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDerreck.

I'm LIVING for Milk. Club Kid realness. Not getting Courtney Act (get it?). She is pretty, but goddamn if she isn't dull as hell. That runway look? Totally uninspired.

March 9, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKevin P.

Nathaniel, it's a full title: Joslyn Fox (bless her heart). Joslyn Fox (bless her heart) is so clueless and out of her league, but so passionate for the contest that I can't hate on her.

March 9, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRobert G

Nathaniel, love love your darien lake illustration.

March 10, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterjoe11

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