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« Women's Pictures - Ava DuVernay's "I Will Follow" | Main | 15 Days Til Oscar - Final Voting Begins »
Friday
Feb062015

Vanity Fair's "Hollywood Issue" Cover 2015 - A Discussion

Yes yes, the latest Annie Liebovitz cut & paste beauty --like everyone is there at the same time! Puhleaze (check out that photoshop shadow behind Benedict's shoulder) -- of shiny celebrities with really good PR teams has arrived and we haven't yet discussed it. My bad. Not from lack of interest, mind. So here it is...

The lucky celebs who made it this year: Amy Adams, Channing Tatum, Reese Witherspoon, Eddie Redmayne, Felicity Jones, David Oyelowo, Benedict Cumberbatch, Sienna Miller, Oscar Isaac, and Miles Teller. 

You may recall that last year's VF cover was unusually diverse in terms of ethnicity but we're back to the usual collection of whiter shade of pale beauties. But I don't want to get hung up on that issue again. Awards Daily already covered it anyway. Let's talk numbers before we dig in to each fold.

Average Age: 34
Oldest to Youngest: Adams (40), Oyelowo (38), Witherspoon (38), Cumberbatch (38), Isaac (35), Tatum (34), Miller (33), Redmayne (33), Jones (31),  and Teller (27)
Most Obviously Missing: Where is ubiquitous Jessica Chastain?
Extremely Arguable Rough Length of Stardom: Witherspoon (24 years), Miller (11 years), Adams (10 years), Tatum (9), Cumberbatch (6), Redmayne (5), Jones (4), Isaac (4), Teller (3), and Oyelowo (2)
Cumulative Oscar Tally: 10 nominations and 1 win -- Half of the nominations are Amy Adams. Hee!
Not Virgins: Reese Witherspoon (1999), Sienna Miller (2005), Amy Adams (2008), and Felicity Jones (2012) have all been on the Hollywood Issue cover before. 

More after the jump...

This magazine cover is dedicated to anyone who ever dreamed of hauling Amy Adams around on their shoulders like a sack of flour. Since Amy needs and Channing both need to be in a musical poste haste this image is doubling as a pitch meeting for a reboot of Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. But problem: Amy and Reese are a few years older than Channing Tatum so it's totally easier to imagine them being cast as his mother rather than his love interest. Oh Hollywood. Never change. 

(There is something weird about Reese's boobs in this image like they're two high and round and I'm only thinking this because they looked so great and natural in her nude scenes in Wild.) 

Amy, Chan and Reese are all at the top of their careers so this is obviously one of those Hollywood covers that's not trying to predict the next wave but to illustrate the now. And that's even more true of the fold since all four of these actors have basically just come into their full star power

Eddie Redmayne and his screen wife Felicity Jones are doing a little swinging on this cover because you'll notice it's Benedict Cumberbatch getting cuddly with the Mrs.

David Oyelowo is nearly as shoved into the background on this cover as Miles Teller is (sigh) but at least he gets to touch Eddie Redmayne. Redmayne has played so many gay roles in his career that when I look at this photo of Alan Turning holding his wife I keep imagining that it's just a Savage Grace situation and they'll carry on without her once Felicity joins the Star Wars and Comic Book film franchises.

I'd be most worried about David Oyelowo's career of everyone on this cover except for the fact that somehow Sienna Miller is still kicking around Hollywood and she made the cover again. After years of being a "rising star" she's still more famous for being famous than for any role. Even American Sniper, as huge a hit as that is, can't change that since she's stuck with the ever dull "longsuffering wife" role. 

 

Remember when Oscar Isaac's hair was so super short when we first got really familiar (Drive / W.E.) and who knew it was so curly? You KNOW that Sienna Miller ran her fingers through it at least once while they posed. If they were in fact in the room together. Miles Teller is so isolated in the background (he's the only one not touching anyone) that maybe he wasn't in the room with anyone. 

What do we think of the Errol Flynn mustache? From a distance it's cute but I don't think I'd like to see it up close. He's too young for it (the moustache and the Reed Richards role) 

AND NOW I'M JUST BABBLING. Let's predict whose career will still be just as healthy in ten years time. I'm going to say Cumberbatch and Tatum as "Most Likely To Keep Succeeding" (and not because they're my favorites of the ten... though I do love Chan and have since She's the Man). I'm not going to predict whose career will be over because that's mean. But maybe you won't be as cuddly in the comments.

Do you like the cover? Don't you wish they would really switch it up one of those years. Like having everyone in bed together a la Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice or in action or group dance pose or something. It's very much the same each year and the only thing they do as variations is whether its co-ed or all girls and whether it's established or "Future Stars". The only radical departures are those awful years when they just put like 3 people on the cover.

No! Ensembles Forever.

My dream cover of the moment (it changes monthly) is all Gallic divas: Deneuve. Binoche. Ardant. Seydoux. Cotillard. Huppert. Etcetera. With honorary Frenchies Scarlett Johansson (she married in) and Jodie Foster (she's fluent).  Last months' dream (in honor of Luise Rainer) was an all double Oscar-winning beauties cover: Streep, Blanchett, Foster, Jane Fonda, Olivia de Havilland, Sally Field, Maggie Smith, Jessica Lange, and Dianne Wiest.  If I'm forgetting someone, don't feel the need to remind me. 

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Reader Comments (84)

Redmayne and Cumberbatch are always on the verge of giving me the heebie-jeebies - and this cover is full-on creep-mode.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBD

Y'all nuts - kudos to Amy for that pose. Nobody would even have to ask me to climb onto Channing Tatum, I'd do it all on my own. Hell they'd have to beg me to pose some OTHER way. I mean , she left her dress on! She didn't tear his tuxedo off! What do you people want from her??? She's just Lois Lane, not Superman.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJA

Oy, this cover. Where do I begin?

- I haven't seen such atrocious photoshopping since the DVD cover of All About Steve
- Why for the love of God can't these people all gather in a single room at the same time for one collective photo shoot?
- Photoshopped Reese looks like a Toddlers and Tiaras also-ran all grown up (or trying to be)
- maybe Amy really is our generation's Meryl Streep?
- Channing seriously should've been Oscar nominated instead of Steve Carrell, who was, just, ugh in Foxcatcher
- I'm frankly over the Redmayning and Cumberbatching which we've been subjected to now FOR YEARS
- Sienna looks good in the picture, but the outtakes prove that her getup is doing her NO favors by saddling her with an unsightly camel toe and protruding hip bones
- Miles' curls and facial hair (or lack thereof) is paling in direct comparison to Oscar's bounteous display of both
- I'd love to have seen Gugu and Gina Rodriguez, although I realize the latter is TV (the horror)

P.S. Hilary Swank is a beautiful woman with an incredible figure.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMareko

Indeed, Jason, indeed.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterPaul Outlaw

Mareko -- agreed on Swank. I was just joking but it certainly wasn't about "looks".

JA -- you win. This is now the greatest photo Amy Adams has ever taken.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNATHANIEL R

On a completely shallow note, this is probably the first list where there is no one who is attractively styled. There's something throwing off everybody's looks. Also, the theme of 'oh dahling we've just come from a splendid ball and must gather for a precious keepsake photo' is so tired. I think I'd almost prefer shots of them laughing while eating salad.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterF

Vanity Fair seems to have a love affair with Amy Adams. She rarely gets any magazine covers except Vanity Fair.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAV

My word the way they edit shadows, they're really not trying to hide the photoshop. Maybe it's just me but I feel like they attached Reese and David's heads from a different photo on these bodies.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSanty C.

Is Reese really at the peak of her career? Sure, she produced a couple of movies that got attention, especially Gone Girl, but her peak days as an A-list actress are over. Wild has grossed around $36 million. Meh. She also is married to a CAA agent and is getting pretty heavy on the makeup and plastic surgery, which may all be achievements to some but definitely not to me. I can't stand how she continually asserts herself as important.

Amy Adams is 40? I guess this is it for her, so maybe Channing is carrying her to the retirement home.

Oscar Isaac is adorable. None of the others register positively in this collage.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJono

@Abel

Yeah, I agree. I'm not sure if it's misogyny, but there's always so much more cattiness here directed at the women than there is at the men.

I like both Cooper and Adams (okay I dont like Adams so much as worship at her altar) but the point you make is a salient one.

Also she barely looks 30, much less too old to play Tatum's or Cavill's love interest - though I know some of those comments are more of a sarcastic attack on Hollywood casting patterns.

But on the other hand it's really disturbing how as a woman you can win two Oscars and build a relatively enviable career and be nothing but nice and gracious and still the discussion turns into "but is she a beauty or not?"

Otherwise even I myself was gonna come here to complain about Sienna Miller's place in any cover/conversation about stars or acting - initially I didn't even recognise her in that picture because for an actress to be recognisable in my books she needs to be compelling for at least a 30-second patch of screentime.

But now, in the interests of equal opportunity, I feel I must also bash Mr. Oyelowo because I finally saw Selma last night and boy, was that performance underwhelming. In between the basic-mimicry speeches, where was the pulse in that performance? This was a man who felt incredible religious fervour and incense at the widespread injustice, was under constant threat of assassination, went to whores and presumable operated at a high level of adrenaline at all times. So what's with Oyelowo's choice to take naps in between monologues?

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commentergoran

abel & goran -- eh. There's more of EVERYTHING directed at women because we talk about women all the time. I'm proud of this, having a site that actually cares about and celebrates actresses regularly.

people are so touchy lately. Must be Oscar season.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNATHANIEL R

Doesn't Glenda Jackson have two Oscars? is she still even alive?

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterChrisConcert

Chan and Amy look like they're getting ready for uncomfortable car sex.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTyler

Oh, come Nathaniel, who's being touchy now?

No one here is attacking the site, I come here all the time precisely because of the reasons you mention.

I agree that the extra-cattiness reserved for women is partly a symptom of how actresses are - wonderfully - much more important and interesting than actors to your readers (myself included).

But it's a nauseating symptom nonetheless, and I don't see what's wrong with pointing it out.

eg. Comments about Swank being way over-rewarded are fair game, whether anyone disagrees or not. But comments along the lines of "well she's ugly anyway" are just icky.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commentergoran

ChrisConcert,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDtClJYJBj8

I bet if she decided to come back she would still be an awards magnet. I can already picture her in The Lion in Winter remake.

February 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterdela

A focus on actresses is important. Trust me, there is a big drop off after Meryl Streep. If Tilda Swinton, Julianne Moore and a person of color are the next tier, then we are good. If you don't like gay banter, then you are losing an important audience. But who will fund vehicles for them?

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJono

Tyler: What kind of car? The Popemobile?

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHenry

Mareko - Adams isn't even close to the presence, charm or skill that Streep has. I'm consistently baffled by the nominations she has received (outside of Junebug and The Fighter). I think she is a curious case of 1/2 the people really liking her and the other 1/2 not giving a shit. She will eventually win but I fear it's for a career type win. I'm dreading the Joplin pic, unless she doesn't sing herself. The Curious Case of Amy Adams' Career

Yes, Swank is over-rewarded but I think she is quite fetching. She has the type of face that will age very well. Honestly there are worse double winners, like Sally Field and Liz Taylor. Both of them are better actors but one of their wins was clearly not deserved...except maybe Field for Places in the Heart. That was a weak field. I wish MacLaine won for The Apartment instead of Taylor and Streep could have won for Silkwood instead of MacLaine for Terms of Endearment (which was still a good win).

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRyan

"getting pretty heavy on the makeup and plastic surgery, which may all be achievements to some but definitely not to me."

huh???? A) if a woman wants to wear makeup, that's her right, and B) plastic surgery??? Reese's face looks exactly the same and 100% natural to me. And even if it wasn't, who are you to judge her looks as if that determines her worth? Gross.

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterPhilip H.

I don't understand why Amy Adams keeps getting great movie roles from famous directors (PTA, David O. Russell, Spike Jonze, Jean-Marc Vallée and the list goes on and on). Is she the only actress in Hollywood?? Why can't Jessica Chastain, Julianne Moore or Naomi Watts get those roles?

I always hear high praises from the directors she worked with. PTA keeps calling Amy his pet(!). He sounds like he's obsessed with her. I'm convinced she slept her way to top!!

re:Hilary Swank - She deserved her two Oscar wins. The problem with her is her look (I'm not shading her). If she looked like Charlize or even Amy Adams, she'll already be an A-List by now.

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered Commentershela

Chastain is the last actress who needs more movie roles. She's already taking up other people's opportunities. Perhaps she can start a charity for struggling actrese. She can give up her movie roles to them!

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKarlM

Yeah, i have to agree. Reese is just about the last person who's had work done. and plastic surgery is an annoying discussion (She looks exactly the same only older. And still beautiful.)

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNATHANIEL R

glad no one tried to say isaac is nonwhite

The affect that American white supremacy has had on you is evident in this reply.

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered Commenter3rtful

I think Amy Adams is great. Judging from many of the comments, I surely hope this is not what will be coming her way in 2-3 years time. It's a backlash isn't it?

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKai Lor

3rtful - please ignore me. I try my best to ignore you.

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered Commentermarcelo

Kai Lor - Amy will be fine as long as she picks good projects. If she hits it out of the park with Her next two movies she will be moving up the Hollywood food chain. Amy's peers and Hollywood industry likes her. That's all it matters. It's not like Hollywood cares about what we think or else they would be offering decent roles to the unknown actresses people worship here.

I think people are just jealous she keeps getting nominated while their favs only get to sit at home and eat bonbons. They will find some other actress to hate on later. That's just how the game is played. ;)

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSeesaw

Annoying plastic surgery? Did someone call my name?

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNicole Kidman

seesaw -- i'm curious who you would define as "unknown" -- and how can Amy move UP the food chain when she's already A list?

February 7, 2015 | Registered CommenterNATHANIEL R

I just don't get Amy Adams. PERIOD. And as Jase mentioned, she must have the best publicist ever. Cause she is so lackluster. I am sure she is nice. I mean she must be. But what else????

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterDcDean

"..how can Amy move UP the food chain when she's already A list?"

Nat, by becoming Reese Witherspoon...or a man. ;-)

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterPaul Outlaw

To balance things out, so Amy Adams don't get all the hate:

-Nicole Kidman: it looks like she got another clunker on her hands with Queen Of The Desert. I saw a clip from the movie and boy does her acting seem shaky, really not good. And the movie is getting terrible reviews.

-Who else? Channing Tatum: He's in career-killer mode in Jupiter Ascending. He's that bad.

-Mila Kunis tossed all the Black Swan-goodwill out the window with her flat bland performance in Jupiter Ascending.

-Reese Witherspoon: The Oscars nominated the wrong woman walking without makeup-performance. The Oscars should've gone with Mia Wasikowska for Tracks. Stunning performance; especially since The Oscars ARE able to look abroad (Marion Cotillard) .

-Felicity Jones: I say this with pride... nobody, and I mean nobody, hates her as much as I do.

- David Oyelowo: he captured Martin Luther King's mannerisms but not his soul. See Anthony Hopkins' Nixon if you wanna see a biopic-performance done right.

- Sienna Miller: Gorgeous and talented... moving on...

-I hate Miles Teller; I can't stand his cocky and obnoxious schtick. So to see him get abused (by J.K. Simmons) was a dream come true.

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterUlrich

All this bluster about plastic surgery. As my sainted grandmother used to say: "You can never tell a woman's age by looking at her face. You tell a woman's age by looking at her hands and feet."

This is the real reason so many refused to do the mani-cam on the SAG red carpet.

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHenry

@Ulrich...why would you take pride in hating someone? Not cool.

The photo is fabulous..and cheers to a long and fulfilling career to each and every one of these gifted actors.

February 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMB76

Thanks

July 20, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterVanity Numbers
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