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Thoughts I Had... This EW "Thor: Ragnarok" Cover

Though it's 240 days until Thor: Ragnarok is in theaters, the heavy promo starts now. EW's new cover features Chris Hemsworth, sans long light blonde Thor wig and thus looking far less Scandinavian (sigh) and his two female co-stars. Thoughts that came to me as they came to me without stopping to edit are after the jump...

• Is Thor Ragnarok going to be as colorful as this cover implies -- going against the trend in superhero movies which are trying to be SERIOUS AND IMPORTANT by draining themselves of color (DC movies) or just picking one (Logan) -- or is this merely some internet at EW having fun with the fill function in Photoshop on the text?

• Losing the hair was bad enough (Hemsworth doesn't look like Thor at all now!) but no hammer either? What the hell, Taika

• No offense, Taika Waititi. I'm absolutely sure you're going to make the very best Thor movie both because the bar is so hilariously low (seriously those movies suck). But Thor's hair and his hammer were not remotely the problems with those movies, so good luck!

• Great move, EW with that double-take in text form

"Yes, that's Cate Blanchett!" 

• I probably don't need to remind you what happened last time Cate Blanchett got black hair to play a villain role. These are not happy memories.

• But that said, it's quite fun that the Hair and Makeup team on Ragnarok used up all the "smoky eye" budget on the wrong side of her eyeballs.

• Sometimes when I see photos of Cate Blanchett from any movie now my first thought is "What would Carol Aird think of this?" if it's not "What would Jasmine think of this?" And in both cases it's almost never pleasant -- seriously that woman...er those women... be hard to please!

• Black finger nail polish is so 1990s. It's also so Goth and so literal for a character named "Hela, Goddess of Death"

• Tessa Thompson is so gorgeous. That is all.

• I was going to say something about those funky decorative things on her face but promptly forgot what they reminded me -- oh wait, was it butterfly bandages? I dont know. Anyway, I like 'em.

• I am going to be so disappointed if we don't get Valkyrie on her winged horse... well, actually no, the Thor movies can't disappoint because they come with no expectations being the most disposable of Marvel Studios movies. 

• Did you understand what they were trying to do with her character on Westworld? I did not. 

• No.

• I can't tell if we're dealing with reflective costumes or if Thor's armor has some kind of paint splatter effect? Anyway the costumes this time are by Mayes C Rubeo, a Mexican designer who previously costumed Avatar, John Carter, World War Z, and Warcraft, and so she knows from big spectacle movies. 

• Also where is the Hulk? 

• [SPOILERS] Apparently the plot results from a prison break* for Hela and Hela ends up banishing Thor to a different planet where he reunites with Hulk who is the top gladiator in that world. Presumably after beating each other to a pulp in expensive CGI kind of ways, they will then patch things up and get back to Asgard to deal with Hela? [/SPOILERS]

• *Prison breaks from eternal captivity are common in genre fare right? Superman II, Man of Steel, That movie where Julianne Moore is the dragon with stupid red hair. I'm sure there are others but those three popped immediately to mind.

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Reader Comments (37)

Thoughts I had...
another talented young actor -Tessa Thompson, whom I'm so smitten with - going the shitty superhero route! Pisses me off to no end!

Next, Anya Taylor-Joy - another one of my favorite new actors - will be joining an X-Men movie.
Pissses me off even more!

I'm not a movie snob, but superhero movies are:
Pretty shitty - with very few exceptions.
And they contract their actors for thousands of sequels - each worse than the other.
And the actors are given- and that's worse than the shitty storylines or the shoddy CGI or the mind-numbing, endless action scenes - NOTHING TO DO!
Because they insist on cramming so many superheroes/villains into every movie - which leaves no room for any sort of character development.
Rembember how they fucked over Olivia Munn - a wonderful actress - in X-Men Apocalypse and gave her nothing to do?
I'm sure they'll do the same with Tessa Thompson and Anya Taylor-Joy. And it breaks my heart.

Superhero movies; leave the talented young actors alone, please!
Or at least, dangle your superhero paychecks in front of actors I don't like, please!!

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterUlrich

She also had black hair in The Shipping News which she is phenomenal in! A seething, hateful performance, like nothing we had seen from her before.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBhuray

Lol she looks like she's auditioning for Drag Race. Sashay away.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered Commentermorganb

Oh yeah to THSN shout out,so awful yet real.I thought it was Carmen Ejogo.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered Commentermarkgordon

Thought I had: Only Cate can make me take interest in a Superhero movie.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterEz

The image of Blanchett inside the issue looks much better than this cover. Blanchett's makeup and hair in Thor were done by Morag Ross and Kay Georgiou who flawlessly created Carol Aird, Lady Tremaine and the Oceans' 8 character, so I think it'll look good on screen.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterjohn

I can't believe Cate Blanchett's doing a superhero movie!
Two time Oscar winner!
How embarrassing for her!

And Brie Larson will be doing Captain Marvel and countless (I'm sure) Marvel-appearances.
What's the world coming to?!

I can't wait for the superhero thing to die -
will it ever die, I wonder?

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterUlrich

@ Ulrich, This "superhero" movie is directed by Taika Waititi

just glimpse at the Cate Blanchett Directorial Commonwealth and you'll find out why she's doing the movie:

Woody Allen, Wes Anderson, Gillian Armstrong, Bruce Beresford, Kenneth Branagh, David Fincher, Todd Haynes, Ron Howard, Alejandro González Iñárritu, Peter Jackson, Jim Jarmusch, Barry Levinson, Terrence Malick, Anthony Minghella, Hayao Miyazaki, Martin Scorsese, Steven Soderbergh, Steven Spielberg, Ridley Scott, and Joe Wright.

@ Nathaniel, Cate had dark hair in Coffee and Cigarettes + The Shipping News, two of her best and most memorable performances. Both characters are acerbic bitches. She's proven she can play a baddie when dark-haired.

I'm officially excited.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterYavor

No one mentions TSN for years and then all this out pooring of love.Nat hat do u think of her in it.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMARKGORDONUK

@ Yavor:

First of all, Taika Waititi is not all that great!
He's made a handful of mildy amusing and
quirky (some would say annoying!) comedies.
He's not exaclty in the same league as the filmmakers you mentioned.

Second of all - do you honestly believe he'll be able to retain his filmic voice/sensibilities,
helming a 200 million dollar superhero movie?!
I doubt it...

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterUlrich


First of all, Taika Waititi is not that great!
He's made a handful of mildly amusing and quirky
(some would say annoying) comedies.
He's not in the same league as the filmmakers you mentioned.

Second of all, do you honestly think he'll be able to retain his filmic voice/sensibilities, when helming a 200 million dollar superhero movie?
I doubt it...

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterUlrich

@ Ulrich

Taika Waititi has a very sure hand and a unique stamp on his products. Annoying or not, his is another interesting trademark Blanchett doesn't have on her resume.

He's made 4 films, 3 of which (the final 3) are critically acclaimed. = officially an experienced director & a well-known one by the people interested in directors -> actors.

Blanchett wasn't born yesterday. She knows why she's doing Thor Ragnarok.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterYavor

Hela cool.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBrevity

Was thinking "Clare Forlani is looking good" until I saw it was Cate under scads of makeup.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJames from Ames

I don't like this at all

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJaragon

The THOR movies are my favourite of the Marvel series (sue me, I'm not a Captain America fan). Hemsworth is awesome - and much sexier with short hair. Blanchett will chew every scrap of scenery in sight and have a great time doing it. Waititi has a distinctive voice and, from the two films of his I've seen, is pretty great. So I'm all up for this.

*shrugs* Each to their own, I guess.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSteve G

Steve G: I'll always TRY with the Marvel Studios productions. Still hoping Iron Fist is like BoJack Horseman, and the second half is where everything special is.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterVolvagia

Hemsworth has long blonde locks in some of the behind-the-scenes production stills, so the haircut must be some sort of plot device.

I loved "What we do in the Shadows" and "Hunt for the Wilderpeople", so am looking forward to see what Waititi does with this... I liked the first one that Branagh directed, who was also an interesting directing choice for a marvel movie (I agree with Nathaniel that the 2nd Thor is one of the weakest MCU films tho). Cate as villain is a very welcome bonus!

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDrG

Uh... did you see Thor 2? Thor's hair was DEFINITELY a problem. I love love LOVE the new short hair. Now to do the same to Loki...

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterRyan T.

My first impression was " there most be more to it". This cover is so generic that there is no way there is not more to the movie. It's just a bad looking cover. The colors are very amateurish. There is no way they paid that much money with the talent involved to make an amateurish looking movie.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterTony T

There really should be a Thor /Captain America movie Hemsworth is the kind of movie star that always looks good - the man is perfectly cast as god

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterjaragon

Ron Howard? This will either elevate Cate or break her. Supergirl did not work for Faye. And Ron Howard is not an auteur. I have noticed a real lowering of the bar, especially with amateur productions like Feud that are teaching nothing but bad acting.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJono

will i need to see the other thor movies to make sense of this one? please say no

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterpar

Don't forget that Blanchett has three sons, aged 15, 12 and 8. I remember when she was promoting either Blue Jasmine or Carol she said one of them told her "Lesbians? Oh Mum, no one's going to see that ... when are you going to do a blockbuster?" Lots of actors when they have kids do projects for their kids. And I bet those boys love Marvel.

I'm not a big comic book movie fan, Thor was blah and I didn't even bother with Thor 2 but Taika is a fun, interesting choice. Hemsworth, I think, has an untapped comedic potential and Thor, more than most other superheroes, seems to be ripe for some left field humour.

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered Commentermsd

I hope it works. She was great in Cinderella. I don't quite get her plan but she is putting herself out there. What happened to her Lucy movie? Shelved?

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

Cate will kick some serious ass...she's a true chameleon. And I agree that her roster of directors worked with is peerless! No one even comes close!

March 9, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJans

I really hope it works. She was great in Cinderella. I don't quite get her plan but she is putting herself out there.

My God, this looks cheap and embarassing. Blanchett, in particular, is ridiculous here

March 9, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterbarbara_pp

Ulrich: And that Marvel Studios routinely actually gives its actors stuff to do...? Seriously, if you think Marvel Studios ISN'T doing better than most entries in this genre on a performances level, I can only conclude that either A: something being action-oriented destroys your ability to think acting is going on or B: you think acting only happens in "serious" productions.
barbara_pp: Huh? It looks silly, sure, but not ugly. Like, say, ANYTHING from that new Power Rangers movie.

March 9, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterVolvagia

The thing is, the movie business is a business. So Cate has to do this kind of movies so she can be bankable and make other (more interesting, "smaller") movies, so she can go on Broadway for a few months. That's how it works. Viola straightforwardly said when she joined Suicide Squad that she was doing it so she could get other projects she cared about made.

March 9, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterV.

Volvagia: Blanchett just annoys me these days, so maybe I was too harsh...

Ever since ELIZABETH THE GOLDEN AGE, she has become very hard to watch, verging on charicature many times. There are strokes of genius (I'M NOT THERE and BLUE JASMINE), but mostly I just find her overwrought and over the top. There is something very artificial about her face now - not necessarily her looks, but her expressions, like in this magazine cover. It just bothers me

March 9, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterbarbara_pp

Oh fuck, make it stop - Zazie Beetz, another favorite newcomer of míne has just been cast in Deadpool 2 - as Domino.

March 9, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterUlrich

Par- the first "Thor" movie is very good- Kenneth Brangagh does know how to bring a touch of class and wit to these big budget blockbusters and of course we do get the first of Hemsworth ( who is funny in the film) gratuitous shirtless scenes

March 9, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJaragon

Ulrich: Look, painting ANY genre with one brush is kind of absurd. There's always levels. Using X-Men Apocalypse as your brush for superheroes is like using Battlefield Earth as your brush for sci-fi or Gigi as your brush for musicals or Leap Year as your brush for rom-coms.

March 9, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterVolvagia

I enjoyed the first Thor a lot. Kenneth Branaugh and his cities of gold were just delightful but the film was also small enough because Marvel hadn't become quite so overblown yet.

And, yeah, "Why is Cate doing this?!?" because she has kids and because she wants to do Broadway and make movies like Carol and do weird art installation projects and maybe even help self-finance her own directorial debut. Not that she wouldn't have a nice big paycheck from LOTR, but she might also just like the change of pace.

March 10, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterGlenn Dunks

You had me at "What would Carol Aird think of this?" I can't stop laughing.
Thor 1 was ok, Thor 2 was shit .. I'm hoping Thor 3 doesn't follow that trend.

March 11, 2017 | Unregistered Commenter12345677

This blog and the comments on it make it pretty clear you guys don't like superhero movies. But your reasons for not liking them make it pretty clear you don't understand why many of them including this one, will crush it at the box office. We like the outrageous overdone cheese in these films. And I say "we" because Thor, Avengers, and Capt. America all raked in between 500 million to over a billion each and all of them were just as cheesy as this upcoming movie and you can't criticize this movie and then claim you liked those because they all had the same elements you're criticizing here.

April 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterCJ

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