Tweetweek Turducken
Collected by Nathaniel R because Twitter is so toxic you shouldn't hang out there but you also shouldn't miss the more curated pleasures. Let's begin with a question that's enormously easy to answer:
Has there ever been a movie couple with better collective hair then Daniel Day-Lewis and Madeline Stowe in THE LAST OF THE MOHICANS?
— Max Weiss (@maxthegirl) January 15, 2018
An emphatic chorus of "NO!" because seriously. Never. Never has there ever. After the jump some Star Wars, a little Frances McDormand, a laugh from Sharon Stone, and guest appearances by Ratatouille and The Greatest Showman...
While I do appreciate France's McDormand's descent into this Late Stage Bette Davis "Meanest Old lady in the whole town!" Career period I wouldn't raise a fist in protest against one more sexy Laurel Canyon curveball
— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) January 17, 2018
Somebody at this coffee shop just told her friend, "All your pain is of your own making" and I was like damn Pumpkin Spice Latte going out of season has really brought some truth to power in this Starbucks, it was intense shit
— Sara Benincasa (@SaraJBenincasa) January 15, 2018
I don’t trust people that “can’t get into black and white movies”.
— 💥 Dave Eves 🍸 (@CinemaVsDave) January 16, 2018
Cannot stop watching @sharonstone’s response to being asked whether she’s ever faced sexual harassment 🔥💯🔥 pic.twitter.com/MvFR3MIPU5
— Hannah Jane Parkinson (@ladyhaja) January 15, 2018
I HAVE DECIDED TO MAKE A CONSCIOUS DECISION NOT TO HAVE MY MIND "BLOWN" ANYMORE. IF DINOSAURS COME BACK & I SEE ONE I'LL JUST BE LIKE "GOOD"
— DVS (@DVSblast) January 16, 2018
Grease (1978): Two middle-aged teens don’t realize it’s just fucking high school and then drive their car into the sun.
— Ali Garfinkel (@aligarchy) January 9, 2018
Working on my five year plan:
— Frankie Zelnick (@phranqueigh) January 5, 2018
1. ?
2. ?
3. ?
4. ?
5. And then they'll all be sorry.
Now that we know CALL ME BY YOUR NAME was Paul Thomas Anderson's favorite movie of 2017 I need to hear Maya Rudolph's opinion pic.twitter.com/5xG5Qk4CGr
— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) January 17, 2018
I just saw Michael Stuhlbarg — it would be totally normal to just hug him cause of that scene in CMBYN and start crying right? #sundance2018
— J Don Birnam (@jdonbirnam) January 18, 2018
Fuck artistic integrity, I want that Call Me By Your Name/Shape of Water crossover where Armie Hammer takes Fish Man on an Italian adventure to bone town
— Chris Calogero (@RealChrisCal) January 18, 2018
2001: Remember How We Almost Made Hayden Christensen an Oscar Nominee the Year Before "Attack of the Clones" for a Movie Where He Jerked Off in a Closet Oscar Buzz pic.twitter.com/FaqbQyN3qU
— This Had Oscar Buzz (@Had_Oscar_Buzz) January 16, 2018
In #StarWars, some people don't think the character of General Hux is believable because he's both a terrifying authoritarian in command of a massive military machine AND a petulant insecure buffoon. I think he's one of the most realistic characters ever.
— Joseph Scrimshaw (@JosephScrimshaw) January 12, 2018
Bless pic.twitter.com/YApHAikDqF
— Joanna Robinson (@jowrotethis) January 14, 2018
We just walk around pretending it’s not weird that one of our hands is better at stuff than the other.
— Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) January 18, 2018
The New York Times is the Matt Damon of newspapers
— Conrado Falco (@CocoHitsNewYork) January 18, 2018
What would Brian De Palma have done with ALL THE MONEY IN THE WORLD? Everyone would've been gloriously over the top and it would have been dripping with colour. I know THE BLACK DAHLIA isn't many people's cuppa, but how I wish ATMITW had just an ounce of that movie's insane moxie
— Glenn Dunks (@glenndunks) January 18, 2018
i always see people talking about badass disney princesses but i wonder why no one ever shows my girl collette from ratatouille (2007) some appreciation? she SNAPPED in this scene. a mf legend pic.twitter.com/WEFGxdWkic
— gabi (@harleivy) January 14, 2018
Went and saw The Post tonight. I watched a film about newspapers inside a movie theater inside of a mall. It was a dying industry turducken.
— Tyler Simpson (@Braintasm) January 9, 2018
I hope @nathanielr never does a Supporting Actress Smackdown for 1965 because I would not wish this 10-hour cortège on anyone. pic.twitter.com/apGUJAJ063
— Daniel Walber (@DSWalber) January 10, 2018
2012 Hugh Jackman: this is a factory, not a circus
— ᴋɪʀᴋ (@nxrrington) January 16, 2018
2018 Hugh Jackman: this is a circus, not a factory
just discovered you can write the entire plot of 'mother!' using only david byrne songs pic.twitter.com/OrC4uLu9TB
— demi adejuyigbe (@electrolemon) January 13, 2018
Just thought of a media joke too mean for me to tweet, didn't tweet it, will now eat chocolate as a reward.
— Mark Harris (@MarkHarrisNYC) January 9, 2018
Dear Twitter: Stop being so toxic. pic.twitter.com/aVv6YgvxoJ
— Lea Yardum (@leayardum) January 6, 2018
Reader Comments (9)
Sharon Stone NEEDS a comeback!!!! And not the Winona Ryder hair treatment type.
Re: the Madeline Stowe mention. Whatever happened to her? I wonder about that every so often. Hope she wasn't one of those women who got her career derailed by the Weinstein monster.
This may be the best tweet collection you've ever posted. I was going to point out my favorites but as I kept scrolling down I was like "yes, yes, yes, yes..."
And I think I'd totally have the same reaction if I saw Stuhlbarg!
The turducken tweet is so brilliant and the equation of the NYT w/ Matt Damon is uncannily accurate.
Rob-
Stowe was wonderful as the villain on ABC's Revenge a few years ago. She looked as ageless as always.
Geez, who needs that brilliant comeback more, Sharon Stone or Madeleine Stowe? Can they comeback together?
Stowe had a delicious comeback (ish) with ABC's Revenge. Stone is in Soderbergh's latest TV foray, which is getting pretty terrific review, so she may be on the cusp.
Now all I can think about is a '90s-style trailer or title sequence where the 'n' in Stone's name flips (optometrist like) into a 'w' for Stowe.
Olivia and John had amazing hair in Grease. Definitely cleaner.
Why can't Ryan Murphy give one of his many Jessica Lange vehicles to Sharon Stone? Come on, Ryan...she would eat the screen up, and it would be awesome.