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« Welcome to the Academy | Main | From the Set to the Runway: Hepburn, Dunaway... Malick? »
Friday
Jun172011

Tom Cruise Has Magic Hair

Today Tom Cruise released the first picture of himself in character as "Stacee Jaxx" for the musical comedy ROCK OF AGES (2012) which is based on this Broadway hit. I'm sure some blogs will say this looks ridiculous but it's supposed to. The show is a broad comedy! The weird part is that his storyline revolves around a journalist trying to expose him. Wasn't that a subplot in Magnolia... or was that just Frank TJ Mackey's paranoia talking? I haven't seen that movie in forever.



In addition to Tom's magic sperm, which seems to unlock greatness in actresses as soon as they reject it, he has always had magic hair. No matter what style it's in for a film, no matter if its buzzcut military or yuppie floppy, or long and lanky, or rock-star wispy it always looks crazy perfect. It always ends up looking like that's the way his hair was always meant to be. Barring Interview With a Vampire but that was a wig. (Oh god please tell me that was a wig. Otherwise even magic has its limits)

Rock of Ages opens in June 2012. And what that boils down to is this: One more year until we get to see Catherine Zeta Jones singing and dancing again. Yes! The cast list also includes Alec Baldwin, Mary J Blige, Julianne Hough, Paul Giamatti, Russell Brand, Bryan Cranston and Malin Akerman.

P.S. this tattoo is made of LOL.  I sincerely hope that the costume designer -- not yet named on IMDb -- is on point for this movie. It could be a joyously funny movie if the details are great.

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Reader Comments (16)

Danzig is backkkk! yeah

June 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercaro

Whoa whoa whoa. No gripe (or worry or scold or...) about casting stars that can't sing?? I thought there was contractual obligation in the mix here! I don't think you've expressed any disdain towards this particular cast yet!

You're off your game. ;)

(Just kidding of course, the cast looks fine, but not many known singers in the mix...)

June 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJake D

Hahaha
That's so funny!

June 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterIsabel Archer

i've seen that tattoo before - on porn actor eddie diaz. i wonder if tom or the costume designer is a fan?

June 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterpar3182

Jake -- the delineating factor being that this is not a legit musical. it's a karaoke-ish jukebox musical and with a little vocal coaching, so long as the actors aren't tone deaf, they'll be able to sing Jon Bon Jovi songs, you know? :)

June 17, 2011 | Registered CommenterNATHANIEL R

It truly is the biggest clusterfuck of actors I've seen in quite some time. I can't quite imagine any of these actors together and in a musical, no less.

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGlenn Dunks

Alright- just don't want you to get off your game. ;)

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJake D

is it right to still fancy tom cruise,that stomach!!! ooo la la.

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMrripley

If Dee Snyder can get good notices for taking on a big role in Rock of Ages, anyone who isn't tone deaf can do the same.

I really don't like this show, but I think it was my unabashed hatred for all things Constantine Maroulis that set me over the edge. I'll give the film a chance when it comes out for Mary J Blige.

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRobert G

Cruise's workout routine and diet, anyone? This guy is in his mid-40's.

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercal roth

You having not seen Magnolia makes me salivate at the idea of you watching Magnolia as it is my esteemed number one movie of all time!! PLEASE??

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCory Rivard

And by that I mean - having not seen Magnolia in FOREVER. :)

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCory Rivard

I was going to say I MOST CERTAINLY HAVE SEEN MAGNOLIA.

just not in a long time because it's kind of my least favorite PT anderson movie. or, well... not really, but i like it less than most people. I think Boogie Nights and There Will Be Blood are both far superior.

June 18, 2011 | Registered CommenterNATHANIEL R

Nat, it gets better

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercal roth

Am I the only one who thought that this post would be about be about Tom's pubic hair?

June 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDanilo S.

Danilo -- it's not? j.k. i did give it is requisite closeup

June 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNathanielR
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