RuPaul's Drag Race S9E2 - Bring It On, Bitches!
Saturday, April 1, 2017 at 9:00PM 
by Chris Feil
Brr it’s cold in here!
There must be some Toros Clovers drag queens
In the atmosphere!
Sorry, what with this week’s cheerleader-themed episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race, I’ve got Bring It On on the brain! Last week’s premiere was Gaga-fied (and queen-lite) but this week was back to basics: a group challenge, runway, backstories, shade, and elimination. Honestly these first two episodes would be way more satisfying as one supersized episode - even this one follows the show's successful formula, but we're going to need a major uptick in energy as the season progresses.
Oh right, and that little cliffhanger of a returning queen...
The episode immediately revealed that the queen back in the competition is season eight contestant Cynthia Lee Fontaine. I hope you’re ready to see even more of her cucu! You may remember that I am a member of Team Cucu Freedom, but this return isn’t necessarily one I stand by. As the winner of last season’s Miss Congeniality, the fact that she’s already received a cash prize makes this return slightly more unfair. This isn’t like Shangela returning in season 3 after being the first eliminated from season 2.
And once she’s there, the show thankfully still gives the floor to the new queens we didn’t get to know well enough in the first episode. We do get to spend some time in the workroom learning more about Cynthia’s post-season cancer struggle. She’s in remission and stronger than ever in the competition - but I don’t think we’ll have a good idea how she fits into the competition until next episode when the shock of her return has cooled down.
OMG Lisa Kudrow! No, Wait, Come Back! - In a complete opposite of what we saw last week with Gaga, Lisa Kudrow pops in to quote The Comeback and leave - seriously her screen time was less than a commercial break. Strange, but we’ll take Kudrow any way we can.
Where was the mini-challenge for this episode? There’s a growing number of episodes where they’ve disposed of them, so let’s hope they’re not gone entirely or we’d be losing some of the show’s hilarity. More time for the queens to shine, not less!
The queens were split off into teams (led by Cucu and last week’s winner Nina Bo’nina Brown) for their cheerleading routine extravaganza. Nina’s team had a higher degree of drama with the Nina-decreed “underdog” Jaymes Mansfield stumbling over multiple roles much to Alexis Michelle’s consternation. Methinks poor Jaymes is simply not used to working in a group setting.
I think I’ve finally unclenched from watching the queens learn their cheer routines. Previous season have asked the queens to learn some cheesy choreo in not enough time, but now that the show becomes more mainstream they are just going to fully launch these girls into the air with no experience. Charisma Uniqueness Nerve Talent and Not Breaking Your Damn Neck, I guess. Glad you’re not afraid of heights, Farrah Moan, because your tiny ass was always going to be the top of that pyramid.
The girls got through it unscathed so maybe this was the challenge to not send someone home. (I’ll stop complaining about the premiere, I swear.) The White Party runway however was strong all around, save for Kimora Blac’s shreaded nautical get up. Land Ho, indeed!
Best Runway - Valentina. Shea Couleé 60s space age and Cynthia’s gemtastic looks were divine, by our Almodóvar-loving’s personal connection to her wedding dress shone through. She may be growing even more grating with her wide-eyed, beauty pageant way of speaking, but girl can deliver a stunning look.
Valentina took the win, while the very obvious bottom two of Jaymes and Kimora were lipsyncing for the first elimination. While I was quite excited for The B-52s to guest judge, I’d consider the iconic “Love Shack” as an abysmal choice for a lipsync song. Not only did the amount of male vocal make for an odd challenge for both queens, but what can you really do with this song that your drunk grandmother hasn’t done at three weddings?
You would think this song would however be right in Jaymes’s wheelhouse, but a lackluster lipsync sent her home. You know, I would pay money to see a Jaymes Mansfield show as I adore her style of drag - but when you’re the only one who doesn’t have their head in the game, it’s your time. At least she got to go home on her best joke: “I came in first!”
Current Ranking:
- Nina Bo'nina Brown
- Shea Couleé
- Eureka O'Hara
- Peppermint
- Sasha Velour
- Cynthia Lee Fontaine
- Trinity Taylor
- Farrah Moan
- Alexis Michelle
- Valentina
- Charlie Hides
- Aja
- Kimora Blac
- Jaymes Mansfield OUT
Gif as Episode Grade:
What are your thoughts on this week's episode?
Reader Comments (13)
I'd put Wendy Williams at 15, she seemed catatonic this week with Ross steamrolling those unnecessary interstitials.
Untucked has Kimora much more sympathetic than the regular show, but I assume she's a goner soon along with Charlie, Aja, and Farrah too. Once the show thins the large cast, we'll get a return of the mini challenges and the pit crew hopefully.
"10. Valentina"
Gurl, I don't know what show you're watching, but Valentina is - to appropriately quote Bring it On - the poo. She, Bo'nina, Shea and Eureka are far and away the season's top queens so far.
I did enjoy Peppermint once more in this episode as herself, but her drag has yet to really blow me away. I generally don't know yet who people are talking about when they mention Trinity/Farrah/Alexis. There's always a few like that who feel like they bleed into one another.
I agree with Glenn. Valentina murdered this episode and I'm proud to see a fellow Latinx do so well. She has a natural radiance and confidence that isn't cocky. She seems so sweet too.
another valentina booster here - and not just because she's as beautiful out of drag as she is in. the other queens are seriously underestimating her
favourite moment in the episode was peppermint describing the basketball player: "sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssso fine"
jaymes was a nervy mess but she's got a real future as a jennifer coolidge impersonator
i really don't need anymore of "look at my cucu"
Too many queens, too little time and an utter rubbish first challenge!
The last few seasons group challenges have been total standouts (Rusical, Glamazonian Airways and the Acapella challenges) and have allowed each girl a moment as well as coherent performances and something you can easily follow. This was weird, incoherent, rushed and while I don't think Jaymes was quite ready for the show, her performance was actually quite good in the challenge,
Looking forward to thinning this cast, hoping Charlie makes it to Snatch Game and that Peppermint emerges from the middle of the pack soon. Season 8 really benefited from having 2 60 minute episodes to start things off - wish it could have been repeated!
My rankings at current:
1) Peppermint
2) Shea
3) Trinity
4) Valentina
5) Farrah
6) Nina
7) Charlie Hides
8) Eureka
9) Alexis
10) Cynthia (I love her and get the story but what is she going to bring that she didn't last season? Real talk. she's no Shangela.
11) Sasha
12) Kimora
13) Aja
Poor Jaymes, that underdog comment was unnecessary, she was a dead bitch walking from the moment her puppet walked in. Eureka irritates the hell out of me. All the sass all the time is suffocating & doesn't seem particularly creative or funny. I was cringing at the tearful confession to Lady Gaga. Hoping we get to see more of Charlie Hides. Kimora is endearing in an annoying, vapid Gia Gunn kind of way. I like Cynthia but gee she's getting a lot of mileage out of that cucu joke.
I want to say that Peppermint mentioned in her recap series that they spent 4 days working on the cheer routine and a few queens got injured, but it might have been a Reddit report about someone's talkback after the episode aired. Either way, that's how they pulled off the stunts as well as they did.
I feel bad for Jaymes the same way I feel bad for Tempest: they're both very strong queens who got thrown off when they didn't really get a design challenge to start with. They both make all their own costumes and would have killed a traditional season opening sewing challenge and got some momentum. Instead, they arrived DOA by having to do runway challenges instead. Literally the two seasons without a real design your own outfit challenge (and new, gluing shit to provided nude body suits does not count, especially when contestants got called out for the nude body suits not fitting right) resulted in the queens who make all their own stuff being the first eliminated.
The good news is World of Wonder/LOGO are letting Jaymes shout out his awesome YouTube channel in every bonus clip/interview/content they release, so he should get more followers. If you haven't watched Drag Herstory, look it up now.
uff - my comment keeps getting eaten or something
CHRIS - i don't know how you always hit the nail so perfectly on the head with your "gif as letter grade" but you continue to astonish me with that
GLENN & ANDREW & PAR - hear hear on Valentina... she might end this race as my favorite if she keeps it up.
MY RANKINGS (with where they were last week)
1 Shea Coulee (3)
2 Nina Bo'Nina Brown (1)
3 Valentina (6)
4 Eureka O'Hara (2)
5 Alexis Michelle (4)
6 Sasha Velour (4)
7 Farrah Moan (8)
8 Peppermint (10)
9 Cynthia Lee Fontaine (n/a)
10 Charlie Hides (7)
11 Trinity Taylor (9)
12
Jaymes Mansfield(11)13 Aja
14 Kimora Blac
Re: Valentina - Honestly I think this group of queens is like splitting hairs to rank (aside from that bottom 3). For example, I've been a Charlie Hides fan for years and she's my current number 11 - and for the very reasons she was on the bottom this week. Maybe I should have qualified my ranking because I feel very strongly about that top 3, but 4-10 is probably all about equal.
I get the love for Valentina, and her looks are mostly strong (I hated her Gaga look). However, I don't see a lot of versatility there - maybe even less than Farrah Moan.
Valentina's Gaga look was marvelous—fresh, polished, sophisticated and referencing a very specific look. It was a welcome palate cleanser to all the big wigs and clownish costumes...she looked legitimately stylish (which Lady Gaga often is).
Not to be overly cruel, but not having her "head in the game" was hardly the root of Jaymes' problems. You just can't be that pedestrian of a queen on season nine. She was an easy call for first elimination since the first promo.
I'm not fully on board with this season yet. From what I've seen, only a couple--most notably Nina--have the star power to win it all. I'm ready for more.
But, BD, that's *always* the case. There's usually a got two thirds of the contestants who are there for the career boost knowing full well they can't win.
The best seasons have several potential winners: Season 5, All-Stars 2. At this point, I can see Shea or Nina. That's it.