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Monday
Jan072019

The Third Annual Golden Globe Presenter Ranking

by Jorge Molina

The Globes are known for shaking things up a bit. As we could see last night, it’s not always necessarily for the best. However, the much looser environment of the show allows them to have more fun with presenters, and the gathering of both film and television stars usually leads to unexpected combinations of people and bursts of chemistry. 

In our now annual tradition, here is the third annual ranking of the Golden Globe presenters:

32. Johnny Galecki, Kaley Cuoco, and Jim Parsons – presented Best TV Actor Drama and Best TV Drama: right before the Big Bang Theory trio walked on stage, host Andy Samberg made a joke about how they were about to make a Les Moonves indictment. They did not look happy or comfortable; the joke threw them off. They wanted to get off stage as quickly as possible, and it showed.

31. Mike Myers - introduced Bohemian Rhapsody clip: Myers was just a reminder of how big of a presence Bohemian Rhapsody had at the Globes. His meta-role inside it bothered me a lot -- Nathaniel, too. Not necessarily his fault, but his association to the film tainted him.

30. Tyler Perry – introduced Vice clip: I know this is a me thing, but I’ve never been a Tyler Perry fan. And his association with Vice (the movie that looks like the Venn diagram of all things I’d never enjoy in a movie) didn’t help his case. Sorry, I guess? 

29. Octavia Spencer – introduced Green Book clip: Poor Octavia. Somehow, the weight of Green Book’s “message” and “relevance” was on her shoulders for most of the night. She looked somewhat uncomfortable to be in the room for that film, both when she introduced the clip package, and onstage when the film won.

28. Sam Elliott – introduced A Star is Born clip: pretty straightforward. An actor from the film introduces it. Not much more to it, but always nice to hear that raspy, almost unintelligible voice. 

27. Adam Driver and John David Washington – introduced BlackKklansman clip: same as above, it got the job done well and efficiently. But this time we got two handsome men in suits and that counts for something. 

26. Gary Oldman – presented Best Drama Actress: Gary got to announce Glenn Close’s name which led to the best moment of the telecast. He didn’t do much else, but he gets points for that. 

25. Saoirse Ronan – presented Best Actor Comedy or Musical: even though she's making her due as the former Best Actress in a Comedy to name the actor, it’s weird that they had Saoirse present by herself, especially when she's usually been paired with someone else, whether Greta or Margot Robbie. But I will never turn away the opportunity to hear her speak. 

24. Justin Hartley, Chrissy Metz, and Sterling K. Brown – presented Best TV Actress Comedy and Best TV Comedy: these were also a very straightforward trio, stars of one of TV’s biggest show. Looming over them was the online rumor that Chrissy Metz had called Alison Brie a bitch while the mic was on. She was presenting her category. What I wouldn’t give to have seen Brie take the stage.

23. Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga – presented Best Actor TV Comedy: first presenters of the night, following a good opening monologue. I wasn’t expecting them to do a crazy bit, but I think they would have done something more with each other, since they’ve been sold as such a pair throughout the season. They both looked great and always nice to actually see them together. 

22. Taron Edgerton and Amber Heard – presented Best Actor TV Limited Series: can’t remember what they said, or if they had any kind of witty banter between them. But wow they are both beautiful people and sometimes that’s enough. Good place to mention that TFE is actually very excited for Rocket Man ?!?

21. Chadwick Boseman, Lupita N’yongo, Danai Gurira and Michael B. Jordan – introduced Black Panther clip and presented Best Animated Feature: I think the more is the merrier when it comes to having members of a cast present their movie. And when they all look as amazing as these four did? Not a complaint. Also I got shivers when they said “Wakanda Forever” in unison. 

20. Bill Murray – presented Best Comedy or Musical: he’s a legend, and he owns a stage the moment he walks up to it. He had a champagne glass with him. But he looked confused and annoyed? Was he already drunk? Will we ever find out?

19. Harrison Ford – presented Best Director: speaking of confused and annoyed. Harrison has built a reputation for being just that in award shows, but at least he’s self-aware about it and leans into it. He also started off with a charming remark about following Jeff Bridges. 

18. Julianne Moore and Richard Gere – presented Best Actor Drama: these two could have walked out, not said anything, opened the envelope and showed it to the camera and I would have been satisfied. 

17. Lucy Liu – introduced Crazy Rich Asians clip: It feels a bit icky that she was asked to introduce that movie (which she had no involvement with) almost certainly only because she’s a prominent Asian woman in Hollywood. They wouldn’t do that with white people. But we honestly don’t see enough Lucy Liu, and I’ll take any chance we can get.

16. Chris Pine – presented Jeff Bridges with Cecil B. DeMille award: If we're going to get a lengthy introduction to a tribute we might as well be staring into Chris Pine’s eyes.

15. Idris Elba and Taylor Swift – presented Best Score and Best Original Song: I am obsessed by the fact that they were introduced as “Idris Elba and her co-star from Cats.” That movie is going to be one wild ride, and this was just but the first taste of it. 

14. Felicity Huffman and William H. Macy: we don’t get enough real life couples presenting an award, which you’d think it was an easy well to pull out from. Their delivery of “witty banter witty banter witty banter” before diving into the nominees was really charming.

13. Anne Hathaway and Jessica Chastain: this was a really wonderful-thought pair. Two bubbly, smart, beautiful actresses. Their banter wasn’t really that memorable, but it did make me wish to see them together onscreen. 

12. Steve Carrell – introduced Carol Burnett award: Look, because of her influence and accomplishments, a woman should have presented Carol Burnett with her award. But if we have to have a man, Steve Carrell did a very commendable job. He was funny, and charming, and sincere, and he keeps pressing my daddy issue buttons. 

11. Sam Rockwell and Allison Janney – presented Best Supporting Actress: is it a Globes tradition to pair the previous years’ supporting winners? Even if it isn’t, Rockwell and Janney have great chemistry together, and the physical disparity between the two made their banter even more entertaining. (Also, different topic, but I’m still dead over that Fosse teaser trailer…) 

10. Kristen Bell and Megan Mullally – presented Best Actress TV Drama: I always appreciate when the presenters are able to take something that just happened in the show and go off-book with it. Kristen and Megan started off commenting on Regina King’s previous speech about hiring more female talent by asking for a job. This is also peak “perfect pairing you’d never thought of before…”

9. Nicole Kidman – presented Best Drama: Nicole showed up, walked on stage, and read from an envelope. No more and no less. But looking the way she did, that’s all she ever needs to do.

8. Emily Blunt and Dick Van Dyke – presented Mary Poppins Returns clip: Emily is pure human sunshine and Dick is a living legend. There was no going wrong with this pairing, exemplifying the freshness and nostalgia of the movie they were presenting perfectly. Dick also got one of the few standing ovations of the night. 

7. Taraji P. Henson and Gina Rodriguez – presented Best TV Supporting Actor: file this under “pairings you never knew you desperately needed and now all you can think about are opportunities for the two of them to co-star in" 

6. Emma Stone, Olivia Colman and Rachel Weisz – introduced The Favourite clip: Let these three host the Oscars. They have explosive chemistry (the main reason why The Favourite works as well as it does), are naturally funny, and have been doing one hell of a job exploiting all this in the award circuit. Rachel Weisz saying “tongue-lashing” is my ASMR.

5. Catherine Zeta-Jones and Antonio Banderas – presented Best Foreign Language Film: Foreign tends to be a category where award shows go really literal in who presents, usually people of, well, foreign nationalities or with thick accents. It’s a tired default, but we got a Zorro reunion and CZJ rolling her Rs announcing “Roma” so we shouldn't complain.

4. Halle Berry and Lena Waithe – presented Best Limited Series: whoever thought of pairing these two together should get all the raises in the world. They were literally radiating as they walked on stage, both looking fabulous and holding each other’s hand. Be still my heart. 

3. Janelle Monae – introduced If Beale Street Could Talk clip: I genuinely second-guessed my sexuality when I saw Janelle Monae wearing that outfit and talk about the beauty of If Beale Street Could Talk. I get she was focusing on her music career, but how was Welcome to Marwen the only film vehicle she got this year?!

2. Ben Stiller and Jamie Lee Curtis – presented Best Actress in Limited Series: I’m not a huge fan of Stiller, but his banter with Jamie Lee (who looked amazing; we all need to eat more yogurt) was hilarious and charming. There’s nothing I enjoy more than a woman of a certain age being condescending towards a man.

1. Amy Poehler and Maya Rudolph – presented Best Supporting Actor and Best Screenplay: How could it be anyone else but these two? SNL female alumns have consistently proven that they have the most fun presenting an award, making the most of the little time they get. Here Amy and Maya went into a great bit about the lines that supporting actors get to say, before spoofing on screen marriage proposals. This is how it’s done, people. Academy, take note. 

Who were your favorite presenters of the night?

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Reader Comments (21)

Saoirse Ronan present best comedy MOVIE actor, not TV.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered Commentervictor S

I'm almost sure that Saoirse Ronan presented Best Actor in Comedy (not television)

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterHarmodio

Yes, I went to YouTube and Saoirse Ronan presented the Golden Globe where Christian Bale won.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterHarmodio

Dick Van Dyke and Emily Blunt! The audience had look of pure joy during their standing ovation. I loved Emily’s joke about her needing glasses to read the TelePrompTer, but Dick didn’t.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Thank you all for pointing out the Saoirse mistake. It has been edited accordingly. It was late and my notes were messy.

January 7, 2019 | Registered CommenterJorge Molina

Octavia Spencer was Executive Producer on Green Book. I doubt she was uncomfortable to be associated with it.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterBiggs

I actually felt that Gary Oldman had one of the best moments of the night with Glenn Close when he presented her the award. When she came onstage and was getting emotional, you could hear him audibly saying (paraphrasing) “I saw the film and you were just extraordinary. I’m so glad you won.”

I thought it was very sweet and must have meant a lot to her, given his stature in the business and whatnot.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterTyler

I thought Steve Carell's Burnett intro was one of the highlights of the evening. The substance of the intro was really touching, the Tom Hanks gag was funny, and he sold that little bit about nominees really well (and Carol's wishful face was gold to boot). Sandra Oh even got in a funny intro to the intro.

The fact that Carell is a man didn't bother me. I hear your point about her being a huge role model for women in Hollywood, but I also like the message that a (straight) male comedian can and should look up to Burnett as well, not just women.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterHans

"She looked somewhat uncomfortable to be in the room for that film, both when she introduced the clip package, and onstage when the film won."

lol whaaaat? Pro-jec-tion.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterAO

* I imagine that the recipient has some say in who introduces them, and it sounds like Burnett and Carell are friends. I thought he was one of the best announcers of the evening.

* Bill Murray always looks annoyed.

* How Amy Poehler and Maya Rudolph aren't being cast in more major comedy vehicles (film, TV, doesn't matter) is beyond me. They are both so naturally funny and exceptionally talented.

* Rockwell and Janney had great chemistry!

* For some reason I found Jamie Lee Curtis to be kind of grating last night. I generally like her.

* Janelle Monae is incredible. Happy for her to focus on her music career when the results are as spectacular as they normally are--Dirty Computer is her best yet. She has a great screen presence, though, so I hope she gets better roles in the future than Marwen.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterJJM

Random thoughts:

1. You know, had Carol Burnett been honored even 2 years ago, there's a fair chance that Burnett superfan Kevin Spacey would have done the intro.

2. It must be the pixel distortion/compression of the image above, because otherwise, what the hell is wrong with Anne Hathaway's and Jessica Chastain's faces?

3. I couldn't help but notice that, based on their very shiny torsos, Taraji P. Henson and Gina Rodriguez have exactly the same skin tone.

4. It's interesting that Jim Parsons is the one who wanted to end The Big Bang Theory, because Johnny Galecki always looks like he doesn't want to be famous anymore.

5. I looked it up to be sure, but Lucy Liu has no professional connection to Crazy Rich Asians. There were a number of perplexing telecast choices, but this one was racist (and with Sandra Oh as a co-host, truly bizarre). I'm sure it never occurred to Dumb White Hollywood, but there was a simple solution: have people from Crazy Rich Asians introduce their film, and have Lucy Liu present an award instead. ANY award.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterBrevity

LOL at Nicole. Why was she even there? She may as well live in that ballroom.

January 7, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

Jenn - she was nominated for Best Actress!?

January 8, 2019 | Unregistered Commenterkermit_the_frog

Gotta agree with AO above. Admittedly I like Green Book unlike most folks in our online cinephile community, but Octavia Spencer's affect seemed happy enough to me.

January 8, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterEvan

Why couldn't they have Constance Wu and Michelle Yeoh present Crazy Rich Asians? Can't imagine those 2 saying no, and Liu is really not that much more famous than them

January 8, 2019 | Unregistered Commenterkin

LoL at twisting your distaste for Green Book as discomfort for Spencer, because you like her.

Givea a thinking person reason not to read anything with your name on it.

January 8, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterMe

Reading this recap of presenters was more fun than actually watching the show.

January 8, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterDan H.

JLC slayed it,that hair,the clothes,the no bullshit attitude,when will she get her Oscar.

January 8, 2019 | Unregistered Commentermarkgordonuk

Folks:

As to the Octavia debate - there is a plausible justification for her perceived vexation (even if it is mistaken...I certainly did not observe any discomfort). When you are executive producer of a film that aims to build a positive message, but instead engenders discord because of (among other issues) its perceived focus upon the white driver instead of the genius pianist, and when Marshala Ali is campaigned in Supporting instead of Lead, where he belongs, then I suspect Octavia might get a little dyspeptic - assuming the Supporting campaign was not her decision.

January 8, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterCarl

The supporting campaign is Ali's choice.

He knew Mortenson was a favorite, and he knew he had no chance at a nomination.

January 9, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterMe

Me: agree to disagree. He would have gotten nominated for Lead Actor as well.

January 9, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterMichael R

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