SAG Live-Blog. Less Painful Than Oral Surgery?

 6:10 Here we are again. Another weekend, another awards show. Three more to go: SAG (tonight), BAFTA, and then the big Kahuna, Oscar Oscar Oscar. I warn you all up front that I am live blogging tonight with a terrible toothache. I fear I need a root canal. I've heard they're very painful but having lived through so many Oscar races, I figure I've had so much psychic pain -- Crash anyone? -- that my nerve endings are probably shot anyway. Hi Tom Hooper! So, what's a little oral surgery?

Armie Hammer is a dork, an adorable dork.

What's the word for someone who is just genius at something without trying to be, an idiot savant? That doesn't sound flattering. Soooo the flattering version of that. Whatever the term is. That's what Hailee Steinfled is. Hailee is home schooled and Mean Girls taught us that that makes for smart girls, Mathletes even. Every single time she's worn something amazing and she's not repeating looks either. She looks even better tonight in a bright colorful stripey thing that only a 14 year old could pull off at a big deal Hollywood event and still make it look glam. Who are her acting heroes?

Besides Jodie Foster, Natalie Portman is somebody I've always looked up to. Diane Lane I love. I don't know I just love the fact that they love what they do. They bring such joy to their work.

The Diane Lane answer totally surprised me. She gleeks out over blonde himbo Chord Overstreet from Glee who Guiliana (from E!) then grills about his hair. He claims "I just get out of the shower and shake it." That's what I do, too!

6:20 Guilina interviews Jesse Eisenberg. Asks him 'how did you get here?'

On a airplane. It's very efficient.

Ha. Love it. He just can't play the 'I love this inane IQ free banter.' game.

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Red Carpet: DGA Girls

Last year's winner Kathryn Bigelow with Tom HooperI'm so excited for SAG tonight.

Oh foolish me! I know it's just going to be another love-in for The King's Speech. But while we wait it out, live-blogging starts at 7:00 PM, let's gawk. I was going to display each of the Directors nominated but David Fincher zoomed outta there the second they announced Hooper's name (apparently he had a 6 AM wakeup call for Dragon Tattoo. God, he's burning the candle at both ends attempting to film during the awards season circus. It's impossible to assume that he isn't happier on set anyway.) So there was no way to matchup of Director photos.

What's more the press photos are often shot from below for some reason giving everyone double chins. Not a good look for most people.

Still, to get you in the mood for what will surely be a more colorful red carpet tonight at SAG, here are the women who showed to support their directors or perhaps just to be seen. Smart actresses know that becoming a director's muse is practically the master key to screen immortality. It's the quicket way to unlock that particular door.

80s Starlet, 90s Starlets, Eternal Starlet

Elisabeth Shue will always hold a special place in my heart but this dress is too Cougar Town for me. Cougar Town before it found its groove as Cul de Sac (never mind. TV reference). I always forget that she's married to director Davis Guggenheim (An Inconvenient Truth, Waiting for 'Superman') until I see them at these events. Do you think she ever pretends that Guggenheim's Oscar is hers from Leaving Las Vegas?

poll by twiigs.com

Remember when Claire Danes and Julia Stiles were going to be huge film stars? Julia's ruffly relaxed gown is a huge improvement on her saloon girl look from the Globes, don't you think? I do have an honest question about Danes. She's been working events for Temple Grandin for what seems like a full year now. Just how much mileage is she expecting to get from that and, however much that is, wouldn't she have gotten it already? Why hasn't she been working since really? Weighing offers? Waiting for them?

Finally... Dame Helen Mirren. You know every director with a generic 20something bimbo on his arm is insanely jealous of Taylor Hackford deep down inside.

Burton's muse, Ree Dolly, Mother and Daughter-in-law

Helena Bonham-Carter toned it down from the Globes but is still unmistakably Helena Bonham-Carter. Bless.

Jennifer Lawrence is 20 years old. We have to keep reminding ourselves because she's working these red carpets like she wants to be look like either a Kidmanesque goddess or a very high priced call girl. Doesn't this look scream "If you have to ask how much, you can't afford to pay."

Finally, The Fighter girls. Do you think Melissa Leo will continue her winning streak tonight or will Amy Adams throw down using the SAG stage as her new front porch. Leo's been giving good speech for weeks but each time she's on the red carpet it's like she's still trying to decide what her look is. Remember that unironic early 70s retro look at the Oscars for Frozen River? Then the sexy suit at the BFCA's. Then the classic safe black shiny look at the Globes?  This is... someone else entirely. I don't remember Diane Keaton being in The Fighter!!!

BFCA Live Blog

8:55 Keith Urban announces that he is "not afraid to cry." Good thing because he's married to Nicole Kidman! Not to imply that she's difficult but she can access the heavy soul-shattering stuff.

8:57 Oh hi! Live Blog. Why am I doing this? Does anyone watch this? Refresh your screens!

8:58 Jeff Bridges is doing his Rooster Cogburn voice for the press guy? Does he feel like a performing seal?

9:04 Arnold Schwarzenegger emerges to open the show. Noooo... I was about to predict that Ahnuld would say "I'm back" or "I'll be back" or some lame Terminator pun that we'd enjoy as a guilty pleasure but no. He's being sincere. [gasp]. That's no adjective with which to open a show.

9:06 Ahnuld...

"I invented not speaking English correctly"

Okay that was funny. Albeit subtle funny which is always a tough sell during awards show.

9:07 Quick show of hands. Who believes that Ahnuld saw Black Swan three times in the theater as he claims?

poll by twiigs.com

9:10 THE FIGHTER wins Best Ensemble. I'm glad they let Jack McGee accept. He was really special in the background, don't you think? He made you believe that he could handle and was even happily married to Melissa Leo's Crazy! That's an achievement in authentic masochism. Go McGee.

9:17 Hailee Steinfeld wins Best Young Actor/Actress. Chloe Moretz is undoubtedly pissed. Hailee thanks "everyone in here. And the Lord." I always think it's funny when celebrities thank God when they beat other celebrities to prizes. If God is that guy cares about who wins movie awards than... ohmygod. I AM GOD!

MORE AFTER THE JUMP including made for tv movie titles, blonde Emma, Natalie skinny/pregnant and armpit licking.

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