Stocking Stuffers From the Movies
Friday, December 23, 2011 at 12:04PM 
One person's treasure is another one's junk so for my bi-weekly column at Fandor, I'm looking at what's naughty and what's nice about a few top Oscar categories... like Best Actress, Original Screenplay and more.
In the meantime, since I may have the lowest key Christmas ever known chez moi, I've been thinking a lot about my favorite part of secular holiday rituals and it's totally stocking suffers. So herewith a list! Tis the season of list-making.
BEST STOCKING STUFFERS FROM 2011 MOVIES
Mr Timms photo via Cinema Blend
• Mr. Timms from Rango.
• A fedora from The Adjustment Bureau. Better than any transit card for getting through a city quickly.
• Those neato contact lenses in Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol which make perfect replica printouts of what you're looking at if you blink twice.
• A gift certificate for a one day shopping / grooming makeover with Crazy Stupid Love's Ryan Gosling.
• Gloves with which to Drive without leaving fingerprints behind.
Pick a toy, any toy
• A toy from Papa Georges' shop in Hugo, any toy.
• A stogie from Sigmund Freud's personal collection in A Dangerous Method or maybe Albert Nobbs's dream shop.
• A baseball signed by Brad Pitt. It's hard not to get romantic about baseball... or Brad.
• Must Have: a miniature picture book of Mike Mills illustrations from Beginners. He drew them himself though Ewan helped a little at the end.
• That "Naughty or Nice" meter from Arthur Christmas with which to judge future friends, lovers, clients, or business partners.
• Hal Jordan's power ring.
• Pearl necklace from Consolata Boyle's costume department from The Iron Lady. 'Absoloooootely non-negotiable!'
• A movie makeup kit from Super 8.
• A pair of boat shoes to go jogging with George Clooney in.
• The vial containing a mermaid's tear from Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
• A Hello Kitty t-shirt signed by Charlize Theron.
• Thor's hammer. Though maybe that wouldn't fit in a sock?
Which stocking stuffers are you hoping for Sunday morning?
Holidays, Year in Review
Reader Comments (18)
Can I have Minnie (The Help) for myself this holiday? I need someone to bake some pies for our Christmas dinner. But not THOSE kind of pies, Minnie. I don't want to eat your sh*t. (although I'm afraid she doesn't fit in my stocking).
A world collision viewer from Melancholia.
I'll take those boat shoes if The Clooney comes with them!
gloriously historically inaccurate white blouses and perforated corset designed by denise cronenberg worn by keira knightley in "a dangerous method"
All I want in my stocking (and yes, my stocking is huge):
- Ms Winslet's Carnage-blue scarf.
- Any of the ties from the Tinker Tailor collection.
- A Kung Fu trained Peacock (they're just so pretty!)
& - A trip to Paris with Rose Byrne.
just 10 minutes with Meryl Streep.
Thor in my bed !!
1. A bag of Chips Ahoy! cookies.
2. The original manuscript of "La Marseillaise."
3. An animist/pagan/aboriginal fertility tchotchke.
4.
Two slices of chocolate pieA can of Crisco.5. A personally engraved liquor flask.
Five stocking stuffers to be named later (translation: my Top Ten is incomplete).
1. complete dilator set from The Skin I Live In
2. ryan gosling's watch from drive
3. archery kit from We Need to Talk about Kevin
4. oskar's beanies and socks from Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
5. taser from Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
6. sketchbook from War Horse
7. gift certificates for tap lessons from the Artist
8. chess set from Tinker......
9. best of cole porter from Midnight in Paris
....hahahaha
I want a ZOO for Christmas! (with Scarlett Johansson included!)
Isn't asking to own someone from "the help" maybe... missing the point?
To bring up an Oscar topic: Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close is getting mixed, tilting negative, reviews and the negative ones...well, when otherwise normal critics break out the anger with review capsules like "Oscar-mongering of the most blunt and reprehensible sort", "approaches 9/11 porn" and "Never has the tragedy of 9/11 been made so shrinky-dinked", I'm starting to wonder if you haven't suddenly overrated its Oscar chances. With those reviews, I'm guessing AT MOST a tech or two and also THANK YOU CRITICS. Daldry isn't going to tie Kubrick's consecutive films nominated for Best Director record.
WOOF: Precisely. I only noticed the irony after commenting :)
Caro -- a bed is not a stocking! you can't cheat like that ;)
Henry, Manuel, JP, etcetera -- i love you all for playing along. well done. wish i'd thought of some of those.
The energy of six puppies!
Gift: Oooh, I want that Hello Kitty t-shirt plus the young adult book she wrote signed by her. Plus I want the bed sheet on Shame poster.
Food: Minnie’s pie or a basket of fried chicken.
Clothes: wardrobe worn by Daniel Craig in Dragon Tattoo.
One of your best posts ever, Nathaniel.
Poppy -- LOL. perfect gift. invisible gifts are the best... especially on a low budget.