Yes, No, Maybe So: "Oz, the Great and Powerful" (Plus "Wicked")

Technically we should resist going all Yes No Maybe So on teasers. When we have in the past everyone expected it all over again with the subsequent full trailer... and I can't do redundancy like that. I don't have it in me like all those heavy traffic movie blogs that will post at least five identical posts on everything "rumor. denial of rumor. updates of rumor. facts concerning rumor. rumor becoming fact." or slight variations thereof and a post for each and every minor iteration of a trailer and each batch of stills and each poster that appears for a grand total of about 250 posts about each film before the readers have even seen it. The studios know how to play the internet these days. But that's why we see too much of movies now before we even see them if you know what I mean. Nobody has any self control and we're all starting to ruin our virgin experiences with new movies. 

But I'm a Friend of Dorothy so I can't resist Oz. I'm whisked up in that tornado every time.

yes no maybe so breakdown if you click your mouse three times...

there's no place like blog. there's no place like blog.

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To Woody With (Tough) Love

Dear Woody Allen,

I will always be there for you. Stop punishing me for my loyalty!

Back in 1984 my older brother drove me to see Broadway Danny Rose. I don't remember why. I'll readily admit that much of the movie went over my head but I laughed and laughed at the helium scene. To this day it's the only thing I remember about the movie which I never saw again. (There were always new and old Woody Allens to see so there was little time to rewatch!). My brother laughed, too. The next year I cajoled my entire family into seeing The Purple Rose of Cairo -- even though they kept grumbling about you stealing the Oscar from Star Wars -- because it was about the movies and because you made it.

It was a turning point. I was already heading towards cinephilia but that blissful melancholy miniature classic handed me a map to get there quicker; my destiny was sealed. 

As a reward to you and a treat to myself I go to each and every Woody Allen movie in the theaters. For a good long time this ritual reaped enormous rewards and I rushed out on opening night. I learned to live with the occassional dud and I still rejoice when you have a success --  hello Midnight in Paris! Nice to know ya --  but as the balance began tipping towards the "uhhh" side of the quality scale, I got lazier about it. It's been quite some time since I rushed out on opening night. I still see them but the passion has gone out of the trip ... it's now something mundane, like a favor you'd automatically do for an old friend without ever considering saying "no." You've a lifetime pass.

And so it was when I hit To Rome With Love, your follow up to a resounding success that brought you your third Best Picture nomination! Talk about wasting your post-Midnight advantage...

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8 Degrees of Linking

/Film Angela Lansbury wanted for Wes Anderson's next film? Gah!
My New Plaid Pants JA delights me when he reorganizes the world. #TeamCharbender ! 
Oscar Metrics returns (yay Mark Harris!) with a conversation about 2012's first ½
Low Resolution thinks Salma Hayek is g-r-e-a-t in Savages and that the movie isn't so bad either 
Hollywood Reporter Channing Tatum's next two projects are lined up: Foxcatcher for Bennett Miller and another filmed version of daredevil Evel Knievel's life, both true stories.
Daily Mail ...and Chan is also interested in a Magic Mike sequel and has made a not-very-serious offer to play the male lead in the erotic drama 50 Shades of Grey. 
Guardian Chris Nolan is suggesting that someone make a Catwoman spinoff for Anne Hathaway. "She deserves it." 
Empire Josh Trank will helm the Fantastic Four reboot as expected (that's one reboot we'll be happy to see -- bad movies deserve to be rebooted, not good ones!) but Daredevil has lost its director. The rights to Daredevil may shift back to Marvel if the film isn't in production by the fall. Please let Fox biff this one. Marvel is better at this now! Keep them all in the same universe.

Have you picked up the Margaret Blu-Ray yet to see what #TeamMargaret was all about last Dec/Jan? I'll discuss it soon if you want. Here's an 8 Degrees of Separation Infographic detailing the various cast connections. I love that Ladyhawke is mentioned. So very random!

Looks Like Rain! Aronofksy's "Noah" is Coming

The publicity for Darren Aronofsky's Noah (2014) -- the first big name biblical epic since, what, The Passion of the Christ? -- is a light drizzle now. Here's the first photo from the set tweeted Wednesday by Darren Aronofsky himself who writes:

I dreamt about this since I was 13. And now it's a reality. Genesis 6:14

So that scripture in case you don't have a Bible (no judgments) is along these lines 'Make yourself an arc with ribs of cypress: cover it with reeds and coat it inside and out with pitch.'

Jennifer Connelly wearing one of her Noah's Ark co-starsMore Noah news
Anthony Hopkins was recently announced in the role of super-ancient Methusaleh who (SPOILER ALERT) dies right before the Flood. Maybe he can borrow Guy Pearce or Cate Blanchett's impossibly old old-age makeup from Prometheus or Benjamin Button.

Russell Crowe plays Noah and Jennifer Connelly as his wife (making this a double reunion for her with her A Beautiful Mind co-star and her Requiem for a Dream director). The cast also includes Emma Watson (zzz), Logan Lerman, two animals of every kind and Ray Winstone as the "villain". Does this mean Winstone plays God? Cause, let's be real, isn't God the villain in the Noah's Ark scenario? 

The publicity drizzle will presumably soon be a flood. It gets like that for filmmakers after they have their first smash crossover hit. In Aronofsky's case that was Black Swan. And what better way to follow up a hallucinatory fucked up ballerina nightmare and Best Picture nominee than with a biblical epic involving mad prophets, animals, and Oscar winning actors?

If you were filling Aronofsky's ark which two animals (or actors) would you start with?

Cast This! "Baby Jane" the Remake That Should Never Happen But Is Fun To Theoretically Cast

 By now you must have heard that horriblest of horrible news: Walter Hill is planning a remake of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? Why? Why? Why? Won't Carrie 2013 be tragedy enough? But after the brief psychotic break I experienced after reading the news (I stood under an overhead light and swayed inconsolably while holding my Madonna doll) I realized that Whatever Happened to Baby Jane is really fun to enjoy in whichever way it comes to you. I love any spoof or homage. I just don't need a remake.

Luke at Journalistic Skepticism, who came up with a funny casting reunion suggestion, asked me to discuss. And I can't fight it. I readily concede that even though I don't want the film remade, it's super fun to theoretically cast.

Nick joked on twitter that Hollywood would obviously go with oldies like Charlize Theron and Reese Witherspoon which is funny because it's horrible and true. If they go older, they'll obviously offer it to Streep & Somebody. But I think you should go with 50somethings.  My brilliant suggestion after the jump...

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