Review: The Emoji Movie

By Sean Donovan

The internet has spent the past few days savagely ripping apart The Emoji Movie, the animated film about sentient emojis and the adventures they have within your smartphone. This is a film made specifically for children of the internet, who might gaze upon this Sony vertical integration monstrosity of app references and infomercials for about a minute before heading back to their own smartphones. It’s tough to review The Emoji Movie, because it’s tough to take its lack of creativity and basic construction seriously when such cynicism and apathy burns off the screen. It singes your eyebrows. No one cared about making this movie; I can’t imagine anyone coming up with a criticism the filmmakers would even protest. The Emoji Movie is the unadulterated heart of capitalism pumping out disinterested beats, an infomercial for WeChat here, a paid ad for CandyCrush there, Sony everywhere you look...

Click to read more ...

CCMA Live Blog

08:00 I was going to boycott the show this year because of The Shark Jump Awakens but I'm an addict. Awards shows. Red Carpets... excuse me Blue carpets. So I watch. TJ Miller begins the show with an okay monologue without many jokes. The recurring joke is the physical gag of his "four dancing critics." In comedy theory this is one fo those jokes that gets funnier and funnier as it goes from the sheer commitment and silliness but it's probably too early in the evening (read: everyone is too sober) to pull this off just yet.

Suddenly picturing a team of 4 puppets typing with me. Enjoying the fantasy.

08:03 There are approximately 1000 reaction shots of Matt Damon already. Which is weird since there are so many celebrities to choose from in the house. 

Netflix and Chill. I'd rather HBO Go Down on Someone."

08:05 That's a joke I laughed at. I am only human.

08:07 At some point critics are called "professional sifters"? Which hmmm. Semantic comedy? There's also an aside about Oscar Isaac that I didn't get. Miller also congratulates everyone in the room

All of you are in here. You're in the room. You already did it. you won.

I lost, I guess. I'm not in the room this year. But Kirsten Dunst and Rachel McAdams are. [More after the jump]

Click to read more ...

35 Days Until the Critics Choice Awards. Nominations Tomorrow.

Actor/comedian TJ Miller (Silicon Valley and "Tuffnot Thorston" in the How to Train Your Dragon franchise) is hosting. Though I usually attend funds are low this year so I haven't yet made the travel decision. (It will be tough to beat last year's experience with Jessica Chastain at any rate.)

Do you think these films will get the boost they need tomorrow?The nominations for the 21st annual Critics Choice Awards will be announced tomorrow. Since there are six nominees in each acting category (which you'll know annoys the purists like me and probably many of you -- the correct number is always FIVE) you can safely bet that most of the Oscar frontrunners will be accounted for so what's interesting is the fifth and sixth free-for-all spots in each lineup. I'm perhaps most curious to see how films on the bubble perform  (like Steve Jobs, Bridge of Spies, and Creed) or whether films that risk being forgotten (like Sicario) come roaring back to life. This is the second to last clue in precursor season about which films and performances are well loved as we approach Oscar nominations (the last clue being the various guild nominations to come).

I shan't predict these BFCA "Critics Choice" nominations since I vote but rest assured that I did my part for Carol, Mad Max, Room and the other movies we've showered love on here. But how about you? Any predictions.