Beauty vs Beast: Dame Julie, If You're Nasty

Jason Adams of MNPP here with our last "Beauty vs Beast" until the New Year, and what better way to ring out an exhausting 2018 than with a spoonful full of sugar to make all that bitter medicine go down -- the according-to-me scrumdiddlyumptious Mary Poppins Returns is hitting theaters this week and so let's get our Dame Julie Andrews on with a show-down between her two top roles, a frisky Alpine nun and a nanny from the stars... 

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PREVIOUSLY Never underestimate the power of poetry, yall -- in our re-match between Shakespease in Love and Saving Private Ryan once again twas the Bard who came out on top, with 70% of your vote. Said par:

"The pen is mightier than the sword."

Beauty vs Beast: Gold Medal Mamas

Jason Adams from MNPP here trying to think cold on a 95 degree day in New York City - let's step back in time then to the cool months of this past winter, known around these parts as Awards Season, and onto the ice, for it is Margot Robbie's birthday today and we never did a "Beauty vs Beast" for I Tonya if you can believe it. I'm a little shocked myself that we never had 'em duke it out. So here, in one corner we have Tonya Harding (Robbie), who fits this boxing talk like a glove, and in the other corner her mother LaVona (a statue-snatching parrot-wearing Allison Janney), who... is also perfectly comfortable existing inside this metaphor of the boxing ring. 

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PREVIOUSLY Last week's contest also tackled an antagonistic mother-daughter duo with Dolores Clairborne, and it was Dolores herself came up on top with a whopping 80% of your vote. Said W.J.:

"That film is a flat-out masterpiece, no joke. Awe-inspiring, fully realized performances all the way around, stirring cinematography and visual effects that stand the test of time. Glad to see it get some love."

Beauty vs Beast: Somebody's Kindness of Strangers

Howdy y'all Jason from MNPP popping in to clear my throat and let out a rollicking "STELLA!!!" in honor of the master Tennessee Williams birth - he was born in the town of Columbus, Mississippi (three hours south of Memphis) on this day in the year 1911, and went on to basically shape the entire Southern United States with his writings; I'd argue he's had more of an effect on our modern view of the sub-Mason-Dixon than maybe anybody but Margaret Mitchell did. And to think a gay man did that!

Anyway for this week's "Beauty vs Beast" let's zoom in on his most famous story, the one about the Streetcar Named Desire that you take to the one called Cemetery that you take to Elysian Fields. And yes that means we're facing down arguably two of the greatest movie performances ever put on screen - Vivien Leigh as Blanche DuBois and Marlon brando as her brother slash ape in law Stanley Kowalski. But whose side are you on? Do you wanna sparkle in that rhinestone tiara or swap sweaty tank tops with Stan?

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PREVIOUSLY Right after the Oscars we riddled you about a pair of the night's meme-worthy moments and it turns out that you'd rather ride on a jet-ski with Dame Helen Mirren than get Armie Hammer's weiner flung into your face (PS y'all crazy) to the tune of 55%. Said AlexD:

"This was impossible. But it seems reasonable that a proud queen like myself would only turn down Armie's hot dog for a real queen, Helen Mirren herself. And jet skiing at that!"

FYC: Ed Lachman for Best Cinematography and Carter Burwell for Best Score in Wonderstruck

By Salim Garami

What's good? It's quite frankly a hell of a shame how little attention and love Todd Haynes' adaptation of young fiction book Wonderstruck has received during this awards season, after its Cannes premiere elicited high hopes about its Oscar chances. Ignoring the unfortunate lack of marketing or campaigning from Amazon Studios (opting instead to push Last Flag Flying and Wonder Wheel -- a decision which didn't do them much good), Wonderstruck's main crime doesn't seem to be any true flaw in its material but the fact that it's such a quiet and small movie. Even its champions give it muted praise rather than rapturous acclaim...

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YNMS: Tomb Raider

Seán here. Another day, another reboot, another Academy Award Winning Supporting Actress. And not unlike Angelina Jolie at the time, Alicia Vikander is aiming to capitalise on an Oscar with a leading role in a big star making vehicle. Vikander has an advantage compared to Jolie at this time, with some notable credits like Ex Machina and A Royal Affair to upsell her Oscar. Angelina Jolie has had one of the patchiest filmographies for anyone supposedly a mega-famous superstar. The two Tomb Raider films Jolie starred in were snoozefests, making the 2018 reboot something no one is going to be precious about, while raising the important question "why bother?"

The reason is that - at least on paper - Lara Croft is a perfect action heroine.

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