Team Experience Finale: Golden Globe Gaiety
Monday, December 12, 2016 at 10:00PM You must forgive your host for these next two and final Globe nom survey questions. Please blame the heavy NyQuill and other drugs for his terminl cold flu situation of the past 48 hours. After snubs and favorites, I asked the team which categories would make the Best Dinner Party and the Best Orgy. No really, I did. I apologize.
Here are the responses and I expect yours, too. Amuse me on my deathbed* in the comments please
*not really but that's what it feels like
WHICH CATEGORY WOULD MAKE THE BEST DINNER PARTY?
Lynn: Lead actress, musical/comedy - I mean Meryl Streep alone would be the draw, but her plus La Bening and my girl-crush Emma Stone? I expect the young'uns (Hailee and Lily Collins) to maintain a respectful awed silence in the presence of these goddesses. ;)
Bill: Either Film Actress Musical/Comedy, as it's hard to resist a one-two punch of Bening and Streep in the same room, or Foreign Language Film, with a bunch of super talented people (Verhoeven, Ade, Farhadi, Larrain) and an interesting new talent (Uda Benyamina).
Abstew: Best Actress in a Motion Picture Comedy or Musical. THE BENING!!! Meryl can make the crab thing. Emma's a charmer. And Lily and Hailee can just sit and take notes from the two legends. And they're sure to be dressed in something fashion forward. A mix of classic and new Hollywood.
Nathaniel: Though I would surely be struck dumb I have to be in the room where Bening and Streep happen.
Nick Davis: Best Actress (Drama), for all the standard reasons, but also because Isabelle Huppert would be stimulating everyone with her feet underneath the table.
Tim: Actress, Drama in a walk. I mean, any list that's Huppert + four other people would do it for me, but it seems like that's the category with the broadest range of life experiences.
John: Viola, Naomie, Nicole, and Octavia. Michelle probably won't be able to make it anyway ("Sorry guys, I'm accepting the Nobel tonight for my ten-minute work on Manchester.").
Manuel: I'm torn here between Supporting Actress Motion Picture Drama (Kidman! Viola! Octavia!) and Comedy Actress Television (Ross! SJP! JLD! Rae! Rodriguez!). It would come down to whether I want a laughfest with the funniest ladies on television, or whether I'd be in the mood to nudge Nicole into getting any of the many auteurs she has on speed dial on the phone and pitch them collaborations with Viola, Octavia, and Naomie.
Joe Reid: Supporting Actress in a Movie puts up a damn good fight, but I'll take the six ladies in Actress in a TV Comedy. What a wonderful mix of humor and youth and wisdom and experiences.
Dancin' Dan: These ladies aren't just funny, they're interesting, and it's also the only category where I unabashedly love every single one of the people and performances nominated.
Jose: OMG Best Actress in a Television Series Musical or Comedy. especially if it's a potluck so we can all side eye SJP's kale salad
Margaret: Lead Actress in a TV Comedy, hands down. In interviews alone, each of these ladies is hilarious and thoughtful and impossibly charming. Getting to sit around a table with Issa Rae, Gina Rodriguez, Tracee Ellis Ross, Rachel Bloom and reigning queens SJP and JLD over a few pitchers of sangria is a better fate than any mere mortal deserves.
WHICH CATEGORY WOULD MAKE THE BEST ORGY?
Bill: Imma go with Musical/Comedy Actor. I know no shame.
Jose: *puts on speedo, slathers himself in lube and jumps into Best Supporting Actor - Motion Picture*
Murtada: Any category that has Ali, Patel and Taylor Johnson must be the one. Seeing Patel emerge as this year's hunk - that hair, that lean bod - is a thing of beauty. Let's forget to tell Helberg about it, though I'll take 1984's Bridges.
Nathaniel: This question is horrible. I apologize for asking it. But I'd probably end up Bridges categories because Fabulous Baker Boys Door in the Floor Crazy Heart Against All Odds Last Picture Show and years of accumulated fantasy. (Bonus points: Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Dev Patel because who saw THAT coming?
Joe Reid: Jeff Bridges, God bless him, is currently 107 years old, otherwise I'd be all over the Aaron Taylor-Johnson/Mahershala Ali/Dev Patel action in Supporting Actor. I'll happily settle for Edgerton/Garfield/Viggo/Denzel in Best Actor: Drama.
Lynn: Lead actor in drama, easily. Two of my longstanding crushes (Viggo, Andrew Garfield) for the fantasies, plus Denzel for the class, Joel E for the darkness, and Casey Affleck for doing what the rest of us tell him to do or screwing himself.
Manuel: It's gotta be Best Actor Motion Picture Drama, yes? You've got Viggo, Joel, Andrew, Denzel, and Casey. That's a damn fine roster of gents. I only wish I could borrow Gosling from the Musical/Comedy category. Do you think Casey would mind if I swapped them?
Tim: Actor, Drama just barely edges out Supporting Actress, mostly thanks to presence of Mortensen, who you just know has some experience in this area.
Dancin' Dan: ACTOR, TV MOVIE OR MINISERIES. Each and every one a bona fide, grade A slice of man. And smart, to boot. Go ahead, quibble about John Turturro if you want, but I won't hear anything against any of the others.
Chris Feil: Best Actor - Limited Series, but I only mail the correct address to Riz Ahmed.
Nick: The one with Nick Nolte, obviously.
Nathaniel: What? No takers for TV Drama Actors? or Screenwriters? Perhaps the readers will fill in the gaps in the comments!
Reader Comments (28)
Dinner Party: TV Actress in a Comedy/Musical
Orgy: The one with the two Ryans and Colin Farrell. They're the only ones invited.
Dinner party, Best Actress drama.
Orgy, Best Actor drama.
Both in film.
Every single one of the writers and readers are gay? Let's make an orgy ourselfs, guys!!! For real. I get the lub
Dinner Party: I'll go with Supporting Actress - Motion Picture for the presence of Nicole Kidman alone, but Huppert and Streep are more than welcome to crash.
Orgy: if I HAVE to go strictly by category I'll say Musical/Comedy Actor, but Hugh and Jonah can just play with themselves in a corner...or another room completely, whatever works.
thefilmjunkie -- i am alarmed that people aren't welcoming Hugh Grant with open arms. He is such a charming hunk for so long now.
Weeelllllllll...
Dinner party: Jóhann Jóhannsson, Hans Zimmer, Pharrell Williams, Benjamin Wallfisch, Justin Hurwitz, Dustin O'Halloran, Hauschka, Nicholas Britell (Original Score nominees)
Orgy: Max Martin, Shellback, Justin Timberlake, Justin Hurwitz, Pasek and Paul, Benny Blanco, Francis Farewell Starlite, Ryan Tedder, Stephen Gaghan, Danger Mouse, Daniel Pemberton, Iggy Pop, Opetaia Foa'i, Mark Mancina, Lin-Manuel Miranda (Original Song nominees - OBVIOUSLY)
Paul Outlaw wins for his Orgy list is truly epic.
The best actress comedy has a couple of modern classics, and 3 legends, so the top row!
Dinner party: Any of the film actress categories, seriously.
Orgy: Film Actor - Musical/Comedy. Reynolds and Gosling a no-brainer. I'd take Farrell's wildness, Grant's cuteness, and Hill's geeky fun. Probably the most consistent group of nominees.
Film Actor - Drama: Affleck and Garfield(!!!!!).
Film Supporting Actor: Taylor-Johnson(!!!!!!!!) and Patel.
Actor, TV Movie or Miniseries: Ahmed (!!!!!!) and Hiddleston (!!!!!!!).
TV Actor - Comedy: Bernal and Glover.
Screenplay: Chazelle (!!!!!!!) and Ford.
I'd also import Justin Timberlake and Justin Hurwitz of Best Original Song.
Man, you motherfuckers are tripping as fuck on orgy. Best Director will be perfect for that. You got the style (Ford), the handsome (Jenkins), the virgin (Chazelle), the watcher (Lonergan), and the fucking maniac (Gibson). It's perfect.
Best dinner is Best Actress, Drama. I wanna be all their best friends.
For orgy, definitely Best Actor Comedy/Musical. But I'm sending Jonah Hill the wrong address.
I'd sit with the Comedy/Musical actresses. I will have to make place for Huppert, of course, I would probably tell Steinfeld to bugger off :D The second question is the easiest one to answer - Colin and the two Ryans will be perfect for the after party ;)
I think Rachel Bloom would be up for a dinner party and the orgy. But if I had to choose I pick actress comedy for party and actor drama for orgy.
This blog can be so damn horny sometimes. It's hilarious.
I wouldn't invite Amy whom I love as she generally is not a good match with a round table.
Dinner Party - TV Comedy Actress. All six of those women are terrific. If only the Emmys could repeat!
Orgy - Musical/Comedy Actor, but really just Farrell, Gosling and Grant. The other two can stay home!
y'all are cheating. it's a hard choice because EVERYONE in the group gets to come.
Best supporting actress. To hang out with Viola and Nicole. I'm moving to a part of my movie fandom where I only care for the tried and tested. These ladies are the real deal. They're great actresses and they've survived many a bomb.
Can I just have a candle-lit 9 course meal with Isabelle? Is that an option?
Haha. I agree Nathaniel. All have to be there. Comedy/Musical Actor.
Yes, I like a crowded orgy. And take it from one who knows: actors are not as good in bed as musicians, and they're even worse conversationalists. Just sayin'. #rhythm #listening
Was hard to choose between "Actor-Comedy" and "Supporting Actor."
The Ryans were definitely the main draw of the Actor category, but I just can't with Jonah Hill's smugness, and who really could turn down the trifecta of Mahershala Ali, Dev Patel, and Aaron Taylor-Johnson. Does Simon Helberg keep the beard? Because it definitely adds to his sex appeal. Jeff Bridges is an amazing actor (should have an Oscar for "Fearless" not "Crazy Heart") and he's probably a really great kisser (i'm assuming).
There are some very beautiful men in the other categories (Bernal, Malek, Ahmed, Glover, Hiddleston), but the Film Supporting Actor category as a whole would be one hell of a shindig.
Nathaniel. Clearly you need to pose this question more often! For All major awards noms.. HAHA ;-p
@nathaniel - meh. I mean he's not ugly, but he's never done much for me.
Dinner Party: If karaoke was involved, it would have be Actress Musical/Comedy, with special guests Amy, Rachel, Issa, and Gina.
Orgy: Actor Musical/Comedy of course, but I would tell Jonah Hill to go grab something from my car, and then lock the door behind him.
@ marcelo- I'm down. But I think we would all probably end up sitting around naked talking about movies. I'm not opposed to that.
Dinner Party: Best Actress In A Comedy Series
Orgy: Best Actor In A Miniseries Or TV Movie for Riz, Tom, and even Bryan. He's pretty easy on the eyes, I'll admit.
Dinner: Supporting actress in film. I'd love to have some relaxed time with those five fine ladies.
Orgy: Actor in a drama film. No doubt about it.