Beauty Vs Beast: The Boy-Men Next Door

JA from MNPP here - judging by the box office receipts a few of you joined me this weekend in going to see the first big comedy of the Summer of 2014, Neighbors, which had dumb beauty Zac Efron face off against the comparatively beastly Seth Rogen. ("Beastly" is not necessarily a pejorative here, especially judging by the hearty pro-Rogen contingent that showed up when I "Do Dump Marry"'d these two alongside co-star Dave Franco over at my site last week.) Enough of us showed to bounce a superhero sequel in just its second week, at that! So since it's the hot topic this Monday morning (and Zac finally has a post-adolescent hit on him) it only seems right to devote this week's "Beauty Vs. Beast" to the boy-men at its surprisingly gooey center...

poll by twiigs.com

You've got til next Sunday to spank out your case in the comments, so have at it.

PREVIOUSLY ON

Last week we stepped into the ring with a tune on our lips thanks to the Broadway version of Rocky and asked you who KO'd who, and finally coming out with the championship this time was the titular Italian Stallion himself, with just under 60% of the vote. I think some of those votes might've been less than Stallone-inspired though, and might've had more to do with the Tony-nominated lead of the stage show; as John T put it...

"Write-In: Andy Karl (...drool)"

ICYMI

I spent the weekend in Boston visiting one of my best girls so I was barely online. If you were also travelling this week (as everyone and their doggies and their distant relatives were according to the gridlock on my way back to the city) chances are you missed some posts. Here are a handful of key highlights from the week that was.

Our Moms and the Movies - a special podcast devoted to the mom's of our team and your mom and whatever movie-love she happened to inspire, directly or indirectly in you.
3 Women -that incomparable 70s whatsit with Shelley Duvall & Sissy Spacek 
Top Ten Palme D'Or Winners - what are the best films ever to win the top prize at Cannes? We propose these twelve. Your thoughts? 
Eye Roller? - Reader James T chose our banner theme this week and that choice generated the week's most robust comment section.  I loved reading about your often-justified pet peeves at the movies. Just get it all out!

Oscar Predictions - First Round
Eight charts are up. The rest this week. Stay tuned.

Tomorrow
Don't forget that Hit Me With Your Best Shot is looking at Blow-Up (1966). Examine its photograph(y) with us. Amazon Instant | Netflix Disc  | iTunes Rental

Unauthorized Star of the Week
Despite my gay ambivalence, Zac Efron kind of took over the week what with the robust response to Neighbors at the box office and his uncanny resemblance to Tyrone Power who happened to have his Centennial this past week, an event that was disappointingly unremarked upon across the web. But, I guess this is what you have The Film Experience for. 

"Neighbors" Starring Seth Rogen's Hairy Back and Zac Efron's Penis

This article originally appeared in slightly abbreviated form in Nathaniel's column at Towleroad (Complete with a poll - so go smoke it ... vote on it!]

Zac Efron and his dildo The new frat boy comedy NEIGHBORS wastes no time with foreplay. The movie begins in the middle of a quickie between husband Mac (Seth Rogen) and wife Kelly (Rose Byrne, because all schlubby guys in movies deserve hot girls. It's, like, the rules of showbiz) who haven't had sex in too long. But soon it's coitus interruptus. Their daughter Stella, the worlds cutest baby (seriously cute - so gifable), is staring right at them spoiling the mood. 

The movie doesn't waste time with its story either, rushing right in. Mac and Kelly are first time homeowners and they think they're getting gay neighbors (yay, property values!) only to realize that a fraternity is moving in next door. Mac's response when he first sees Teddy, the alpha dog of the fraternity on the front lawn:

"That's the sexiest guy I've ever seen. It's like something a gay guy would create in a laboratory." 

Sidebar Confession: I don't really get Zac Efron. He's a decent if ungreat actor but my fellow gays are so obsessive about him that I sometimes worry they haven't noticed that the vast majority of young actors are gorgeous and in good physical shape. We can set our sights a little higher to include enormous talent in the mix, too! I'm just saying but I'm not minding. Just a few short years ago the people were obsessing over Taylor Lautner so... UPGRADE.

Bro shenanigans after the jump!

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Links

Salon "Dear serial tweet-favoriter: you are a coward" lol. a must read for anyone with a Twitter account
The Uncool Cameron Crowe's agonizing search for a title for Almost Famous (2000)... in notepad form
Film School Rejects two members of the staff watched "the 50 best movies of all time" and here are their takeaways from that two year process
Antagony & Ecstasy on King Vidor's The Crowd (1928) at the great end of silent filmmaking
Kenneth in the (212) shares a pretty great X-Men related Graham Norton wherein Fassy & McAvoy see gay fan art of themselves

MNPP tries to rekindle his love for George Clooney with his three favorite Clooneys. Good choices
Variety asks where the kids movies are this summer in the absence of Pixar
The Wire "Zac Efron hits bottom by accepting life advice from Tom Cruise" haha. I'm linking that for the title alone 
i09 see what your favorite webcomics would look like animated 
Cinesnark terrific examination of why Captain America films are what Superman films have failed to be 

news bits
Empire the ever employed Liam Neeson joins A Monster Calls... the new feature from the director of The Impossible. I can't wait until it's retitled something dull like "Dark River"
Cinema Blend The Flintstones getting a new animated feature because no franchise is allowed to ever die
In Contention The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby will be released in three different versions. It's a neat experiment but it fills me with horror. Goodbye final cut and "definitive" versions. That's a thing of the past (Malick, Lucas, and Scott have been trying to force that on us for years with their "oh, i'm sorry did i say i was finished i wasn't finished" tinkering so I'm sure they're thrilled.)
Guardian Andrea Arnold to direct first US film, a road trip called American Honey. I hope she casts professional actors this time. 

April Showers: The Paperboy

waterworks at eleven, here’s Andrew with a brief one

Would anyone be willing to stand with me when I declare The Paperboy to be the best thing Lee Daniels has done? The movie is undeniably crazy, out-of-control, off-centre, you name it. But, it’s this very tendency for excessiveness and divergent tones that makes it such a fine representation of Daniels’ skills as a filmmaker. The Paperboy, from its most hilarious moments to its most obscene, is completely a Lee Daniels in the best way possible. It has as many important things to say about race and social constructs in its era as much as Precious or The Butler but uses pulp, the ridiculous and even the improbable to tell its story. Sometimes with pit-stops at randomness for the hell of it.

Case in point, this evening’s shower about midway through the film. Important moment of character development, or just a chance for a fun, rainy dance with Zac Efron in underpants? You decide.

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