Film Bitch Awards: Best Kiss, Sex Scene, and Sexpot of the Year

by Nathaniel R

This past week we asked the team to pick some favourite screen kisses for Valentine's and we must thank them for reminding us of the sexy canoodling in Notorious, Last of the Mohicans, Love Simon, Spider-Man, and The Notebook. This weekend we're bringing it back to the now or at least the very recent with the 2018 Film Bitch Nominations for our three lustiest categories: Best Kiss, Best Love/Sex Scene and Sexpot of the Year. 

BEST KISS
"Esti, do you think I should go back early?"
"No... No... No, I don't you should leave at all."

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Another Academy Reversal. But We're Still Feeling Battered

We were offline last night (a break for computer strained eyeballs) so we're hours late delivering the news but good news is still good the next morning. Deadline scooped that the Academy has decided to reverse the decision to not present all categories live. This is a very happy turn of events but it's also left us feeling bruised and battered. Deadline's scoop reminds us that a large part of the problem -- a problem that's not going away any time soon -- is the way the media frames these issues. The media is essentially complicit in ABC's tactics at undermining the Oscars. For those who are looking closely at the situation it's become blindingly obvious that ABC is a toxic and abusive partner to The Academy, more concerned with pushing their own stars (like Jimmy Kimmel) and movies (more awards for Disney blockbusters plz -- hey how about a "popular Oscar"?) than perpetuating the brand of the Oscars themselves. And that brand, the Oscars, is the reason people tune in each year, not for any particular host or any particular movie.

ABC has strategically kept the Academy in panic mode with 'the sky is falling' style messaging about their lack of popularity (which is bollocks but facts are hard to see when you're in an abusive relationship). But the problem  becomes larger because the media continually helps them do it! Consider the way Mike Fleming Jr frames the piece (and he's hardly the first) in his article...

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Tweetweek:

 After the jump... Cate Blanchett trolls Thanos, bitter Oscar texting, Regina King line readings, stealing Jude Law's identity, and much more...

I’ve decided to make Meryl Streep AUDITION for my movie. Boy how the tides have turned!!!

— billy eichner (@billyeichner) February 7, 2019

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Blueprints: "Can You Ever Forgive Me?"

by Jorge Molina

Marielle Heller’s Can You Ever Forgive Me? is a subtle study of a woman clinging to relevance in a world that not only has forgotten about her, but never took her into consideration in the first place. It’s about isolation, and loneliness, and people that already live at the margins marginalizing themselves even more. But it is also a rare, realistically moving portrayal of queer friendship; of the friendship of a woman with a man that’s just as forgotten and isolated as she is.

The screenplay adaptation of Lee Israel’s memoir by Jeff Whitty (of Avenue Q fame) and Nicole Holofcener (of many great pictures fame) tackles the relationship between Lee and Jack (Melissa McCarthy and Richard E. Grant in career-best performances) with nuance and bite, and never gives in to "likeability". Whitty and Holofcener know that sometimes friends happen to just not like each other...

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Why *None* of the Nominees Can Win Best Picture This Year

by Abe Fried-Tanzer

For those of us who live within the world of Oscar history and statistics, every year brings with it the proclamation that certain benchmarks need to be achieved in order to merit a Best Picture win. In just the past decade, multiple insurmountable obstacles have been bypassed, with Argo triumphing without a Best Director nomination, Birdman winning without a film editing mention, and The Shape of Water managing a win even after it didn’t make the SAG list for its ensemble. All eight films nominated this year have a variable number of impediments standing in their way this year – here’s a breakdown of the top limitations for each nominee.

BlacKkKlansman
This incredible tale of a black cop who infiltrated the KKK has actually checked most of the boxes. It has nominations for directing, writing, and editing, and earned bids from all the relevant guilds. The problem is that it hasn’t won anything, suggesting that it doesn’t have the momentum it needs to garner first-place votes. If anything, it will be Lee who upsets to win the Best Director prize or the film’s screenplay that takes home an award. Being everyone’s third choice won’t help it win the top prize.

Black Panther
As if being the first comic book movie to contend in this race wasn’t enough, the seven-nomination haul for this Marvel blockbuster is actually pretty disappointing...

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