Breaking Up Is Hard To Do (Six Times)

[Here's a reader/guest contributor to share something aimed at those of you who are single and not feeling the Valentine spirit! -Nathaniel]

My name is Adam and around the time that I began visiting The Film Experience, nearly a decade ago during my freshman year of high school, I had my first serious crush on a guy. While we were never technically official, I knew being rejected for a virtual profile of someone he’d never met was probably not the greatest bookend to a first romance. The years since then have allowed me to be the brunt of even more uncomfortable and sometimes excruciatingly painful rejections but I have also had the opportunity to willfully, and sometimes unwillfully, be the asshole initiator of a break up. As the cliché goes, breaking up is hard to do.

The movies have always been my go-to resource to help me pick up the pieces. The following scenes have helped me, and they might help you, to put that nearly empty pint of Haagen-Dazs back in the freezer, put on something other than sweatpants, and get back out there.

FRANCES HA

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Happy National Pie Day! What's Your Favorite Pie Scene in a Movie?

my first pie I baked solo! Today is National Pie Day and if you don't celebrate it by watching Josh Brolin and Kate Winslet make pies as a substitute/preamble to carnal rutting in Labor Day (reviewed), you should eat one. To the left you'll see me as the proud chef of my first pie a month back. It was pumpkin (duh!), messy, and a little burnt but I devoured it anyway. Despite the deliciousness I had planned for this Very Important Day, film festivalling has thrown off my other blogging instincts (I'll be back to normal Monday). So no big pie-celebrating top ten list or visual extravaganza for this very special day.

When I think of pies in the movie I often think of The Help or Waitress but in neither of those cases would I want a slice, you know? The other most easy-to-retrieve pie memory is the now extinct slapstick gag of cream pies in people's faces. 

Help me find better cinematic attachments to pies by citing your favorites in the comments. 

Merry Christmas from The Film Experience!

Happy holidays to you and yours from the Nathaniel and team here at The Film Experience!

We'll be back tomorrow and you'll have way too many gifts to unwrap from December 26th through Oscar night (March 2nd) as we bring you Awards show coverage, Smackdowns (sorry for the wait), the film bitch awards (starting tomorrow!), a dozen more interviews, symposiums, podcasts, and a more detailed investigation of 2013's finest.

2014 coverage will start sooner than you're expecting, too. I want to say a big thank you to the studios advertising here this year: Disney, Paramount and the Weinstein Co. With their support and your subscription dollars (see sidebar) we have a higher budget for 2014 and Michael, Glenn and I will hit the Sundance Film Festival!  So be here daily for all the fun.

If you could have any actress hand-deliver you a gift today, who and what would it be? 

Christmas Goodies at the Multiplex

I may have mistaken my latest FYC screener for more chocolate but in my defense American Hustle is yummy. I want to make out with it at the dry cleaners or take it dancing in a slutty dress. I know opinions vary considerably on this one but I'm a sucker for movies which let (multiple) movie stars be sexy and funny and complicated all at once so I'mma watch it again over the holiday break (not that there's ever a break from Oscar blogging)

I used to always go to the movies on Christmas day but lately, it's tougher to convince friends to head to the theater after all the food gorging. They're always like "bring a dvd".

But are you seeing a movie in theaters?

poll by twiigs.com

If not, what's your holiday movie tradition? Do you stay in and cuddle up with TCM? Head to the movies? Do you watch DVDs with friends or navigate complicated 'something for everyone' decisions with family members? I'll keep posting because there is so much to discuss (Wolf of Wall Street review tonight) but if you're offline for the next few days...

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

On a final lump of coal note, I'm sad that August: Osage County opted out of its planned Christmas opening. I can't figure why they didn't want to counter-program all the boy movies?

Also they ruined that gif I made earlier in the year by pushing back to Friday but not really arriving until January. Boo. People who really love to see dysfunctional family movies with their dysfunctional families have no other options now!

Three Christmas Movies for Friday the 13th

Anne Marie here to spread some holiday scares. Friday the 13th has crept up on us again, bringing joy to thousands of horror fans. If you're a Christmas lover, then these three movies should scratch that holiday horror movie itch. And if you hate the holiday season, then that's all the more reason to watch an evil naked Santa go on a murder spree. 

Black Christmas (1976) - This is considered a slasher classic alongside its more famous calendar-themed cousin, Halloween. Black Christmas follows a group of sorority sisters in what I swear must be Canada as a deranged unseen killer picks them off one by one. The cast alone is worth the watch: Olivia Hussey six years after Romeo & Juliet, Margot Kidder two years before Superman, and Andrea Martin twenty six years before she fondled John Corbett's hair and offered him lamb in My Big Fat Greek Wedding. While the kills themselves are relatively tame by today's ridiculously gory standards, the true chills in the film come from the babbling and screaming phone calls the killer makes to the sorority house every time he claims a new victim.I should point out that Black Christmas was remade in 2006. However, I'm hoping that a Christmas miracle will happen and the remake will be vanish, never to be seen again.

Gremlins (1984) - The Gremlins are proof that giving your kid a pet for Christmas can be a very, very bad idea. This 80's classic strikes a very difficult balance. On the one hand, it is adorable, as when the fluffy mogwai Gizmo drives a toy car around a department store for the last third of the film. On the other hand, it can be downright violent, as when the gremlins murder a neighbor by causing her stairlift to fling her out a window. Overall, the flim tends to err on the side of campy humor: Gremlins get drunk, breakdance, and mostly act like tiny, lizard-like bros at a frat party. This mischief and mayhem make Gremlins the most light-hearted movie on this list. Fun trivia: Gremlins is actually responsible (along with Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom) for the creation of the PG-13 rating. Apparently the MPAA agreed that mogwais were too cute for an R rating but too bloody for a PG one instead.

Rare Exports: A Christmas Story (2010) - "He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake. He knows when you've been bad or good. And he doesn't give a ****!" Finnish horror movies have a strange sense of humor. In Rare Exports, an archaeological dig uncovers an old man with a long white beard frozen in stasis. When he awakens, he immediately starts kidnapping children and hauling them away in potato sacks. For this monster is only the helper to Santa Claus. The true Father Christmas is far, far worse. This movie gets serious points for being one of the most bizarre reinterpretations of the Santa Claus mythos. On top of that, it's an engaging, funny, scary movie. I promise you'll never look at mall Santas the same way again.

 What scary ghost stories do you save for the holidays? Post your Friday the 13th suggestions below. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good fright