Monday, August 29, 2011 at 11:30AM 
You know the drill now, right? Throw me a question -- avoid multi-part questions or top ten lists or anything that would require a huge ass post all by itself to answer -- and I'll pick a couple of handfuls of them to answer in tomorrow's Q&A column.
Monday, August 29, 2011 at 9:30AM 
Beyoncé announced her pregnancy at MTV's VMAs last night. I switched channels after Gaga's drag king opening number so the news got to me secondhand.
There be film fallout. The fourth feature film version of A Star is Born (2013? 2014?) is now delayed for at least nine months as Beyoncé gestates and welcomes her first child into the world. The musical, meant to be Clint Eastwood's post J Edgar project, had hoped to go before the cameras early in 2012 and with the speed that Eastwood tends to work we would have probably seen it as a Christmas 2012 release.
But now that Beyoncé is pregnant (and considering also that Leonardo DiCaprio has turned down the male lead role), this won't be happening just yet. The Beyoncé/Jay-Z babe will be born first.
Oscar-obsessives should keep a close eye on this one -- the film, not the babe. While the project seems ridiculous on the surface for both "another one?" superfluity and Eastwood + Beyoncé odd-coupledom, A Star is Born is a durable cultural object. It's always a major morphing showcase for the gifts of its leading lady. The first three incarnations resulted in 17 Oscar nominations and 3 Oscars all told including bids for Best Actress for both Janet Gaynor (1937) and Judy Garland (1954) and a Best Original Song Oscar for Barbra Streisand's "Evergreen" (1976).
Will we see Beyoncé as a Best Actress nominee in 2013 or 2014... or will she have to "settle" for a Best Song Oscar?
Sunday, August 28, 2011 at 8:01PM 
Let's celebrate the Quarter-Century mark of one Armie Hammer... (happy birthday!) also known as Armand Douglas Hammer. 'He's 6'5", 220, and there's two of him.' Well, actually just one. But his twinned Social Network role as Cameron and Tyler, "the Winklevii", sure doubled tripled quadrupled okay greatly multiplied the size of his acting career. Hammer has the Prince Charming role in Tarsem Singh's upcoming Untitled Snow White picture but we'll next see him in Clint Eastwood's J. Edgar as Clyde Tolson, the alleged longtime lover / official longtime employee of Leonardo DiCaprio's J Edgar Hoover. So there's two of Hammer this time too in a sense.
Just for fun given his newness on the scene, I thought we'd look at how Armie has been introduced in each of the feature films he has made thus far (excluding Billy Graham the Early Years which I couldn't find. Inbetween the first few features andThe Social Network he had recurring guest roles on Gossip Girl and Reaper but we've seen neither television show.)
Introducing Armie Hammer in...
... Flicka (2006)
In Armie's film debut you can see him walking down the school hallway as "Male Prefect" as the credits are still going. In just seconds he's right near the camera and Alison Lohman is looking up at him. Them's long legs; tall people walk fast.
He says.
Catherine McLaughlin, you need to come see the headmaster.
And that's it! The whole role. Movie line = SAG card. In the credits he's sandwiched between a couple people who actually get names "Mrs Masterson" and "Gracie" just before the rodeo announcers, puppeteers and stuntmen. Auspicious beginnings.
... Blackout (2008)
Just two years later he gets his own title card, third billed, as "Tommy" in an indie thriller about three people trapped in an elevator. He's introduced mysteriously, his back turned away from the camera. Maybe he's killed the girl in the bed behind him? It's unclear but her back has some weird bloody marks on it and he's wrapping his own bloody fist. And then he dresses and loots her apartment (not nice!) before heading out to jump on his motorcycle. Armie abandons his usual preppy film look. It's amazing what a difference a haircut, earring, and tattoos can do for your look.
... Spring Breakdown (2009)
Amy Poehler to Crowd: We're going to blow your mind with a little thing called Electric Slide."
Armie is back to namelessness in his next film as "Abercrombie Boy". He appears out of focus and all judgey in the background with one of "the Sevens", the mean sorority girls that Amy Poehler's 35 year old dog trainer is hanging with. But he eventually cheers up and starts dancing; no lines.
In the scrolling credits Armie appears between "Teen Dude" and "Hookers" (LOL) but despite the esteemed company he's keeping he does actually gets to share Amy Poehler's actual title card wherein she directly adresses him and then tongues him.
You are a pretty puppy."
Shouldn't he have have been credited as "Poehler's Pretty Puppy" instead of "Abercrombie Boy"?
... The Social Network (2010)
EXT. CHARLES RIVER - DAWN
The Harvard Crew is practicing on two-man sculls. There are three baots that are running roughly even with each other and the two-man crews are rwoing with all they've got. We're gliding along with them in the water --
A CREW MEMBER
Those guys are just freaking fast.And we PULL BACK TO REVEAL that there's a fourth boat which is already five boat lengths ahead of the other three.
The fourth boat is being crewed by CAMERON and TYLER WINKLEVOSS -- identical twins who stepped out of an ad for Abercrombie & Fitch.
They know that the others aren't in their class and even though they're highly competitive athletes, they don't like showing anyone up, least of all their teammates.
CAMERON
Is there anyway to make this a fair fight?TYLER
We could jump out and swim.CAMERON
I think we'd have to jump out and drown.
Oh those smug Winklevii... Their Ivy League / Human Specimen superiority established we immediately cut to the news of a real competitor. The rest is movie (and legal) history.
When did your eyeballs first meet Armie Hammer? Are you looking forward to further introductions?
Sunday, August 28, 2011 at 5:15PM Though I mentioned yesterday that we'd probably skip the weekly box office report this Sunday, I had to note one major development. Despite it being a down weekend overall (thanks to hurricane stormy Irene), it's worth noting that the two top grossers were both headlined by actresses of color when it comes right down to it. Viola Davis and company remained on top with The Help (which will pass $100 million this week) and Zoe Saldana's first solo above-the-title gig Colombiana did pretty well despite overall attendance taking a hit.
The plight of ethnic actresses and role opportunities has long been a pet topic of The Film Experience. It's a far more important conversation than the lazy "the Academy is racist!" business you hear about every year. If the roles aren't there the Oscars simply cannot be; they can only react to what's placed before them.
I think it's worth noting and then watching what happens next with Zoe Saldana. Consider for a moment that she had the second billed role in the biggest hit of all time (Avatar), she was the only major female in another blockbuster (Star Trek) and now she has opened her own picture. Will she be "in demand" now in the way, say, Carey Mulligan already is without having to prove anything in the way of bankability? However distasteful and subjective "bankability" is, it is unarguably a factor in careers. So, isn't "Zoe Saldana?" a question you should be hearing Hollywood asking itself on a regular basis?
Do you think Hollywood will even notice this box office peculiarity or just go about their business as usual?
Zoe Saldana, box office Sunday, August 28, 2011 at 2:22PM 
© Phil NotoKeyframe a look back at the multiple Tilda Swintons of Teknolust
The Siren and Sunset Gun on Gene Tierney in Leave Her To Heaven
World of Wonder gossiping about Will Smith and Jada Pinkett's breakup which they're denying (for now)
IndieWire has a chart of the top ten lesbian-centric box office hits: The Hours and Heavenly Creatures -- two films we like to talk about! -- bookend the chart. It's a remarkably high quality top ten all told.
⬅ Your Nice New Outfit This is wonderful. The artist Phil Noto imagines society page coverage of superhero parties involving The Avengers and X-Men and the like allegedly shot by Ant-Man himself, Hank Pym. [P.S. If you're wondering why I always try to mention names of artists and such it's because I hate it when people don't get credit for their work. I wish the internet would respect province more... I just found out that my "Dead Wives Club" poster mockup which was satirizing Leonardo DiCaprio's career has finally taken off on tumblr and yet I wasn't credited for creating the joke or for making the poster. Sad face me.]
Zimbio Thelma & Louise has a 20th anniversary Academy screening in LA. Sadly Susan Sarandon didn't show. So it was basically Thelma & Nope, Just Thelma. This is even worse than last week when Pfeiffer wasn't at the Scarface thing.
Just Jared Tobey Maguire and Leonardo DiCaprio in training on the set of The Great Gatsby.
Frankly My Dear... Speaking of Leo. He's lined up his 5th collaboration with Martin Scorsese. They'll remake The Gambler (1974) together. If you're keeping track DeNiro and Scorsese made 8 films together. DiCaprio seems determined to overthrow him in the Scorsese History.
