10 Word Reviews: Maids, Apes, Robots

A few movies we haven't yet said much about. In the interest of saying something -- more will definitely follow in the case of The Help and The Rise of the Planet of the Apes both of which I suspect we'll be talking about thru Oscar season -- here's two handfuls of words for each.

2011... the year of the put upon maid?

The Housemaid (Im Sang-Soo)
in which a nanny/maid contemplates her own Fatal Attraction
10WR: South Korea continues its Actressy roll. Classy/Trashy, expertly shaped. B+ 

The Help (Tate Taylor)
Maids in the South tell their provoactive stories to a feisty young writer
10WR: Ungainly in telling yet super compelling. Well seasoned cornpone acting. B 
UPDATE: FULL REVIEW 

Transformers Dark of the Moon (Michael Bay)
giant fucking robots return so that visual f/x may occur and billions may be made
10WR: Surprisingly coherent explosiveness. But debris clears immediately (i.e. totes forgettable) C+ 

Cars 2 (John Lasseter & Brad Lewis)
in which Mater the tow truck, the Jar Jar Binks of Pixar, travels the world.
10WR: Noisy unfunny lemon stuck in traffic jam of easy gags. D-

Septien (Michael Tully)
in which..., no, I don't know what happens. Something about three abused backwoods brothers.
10WR: Incomprehensible indie auteurism. Masturbatory but at least someone's getting off. D

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (Rupert Wyatt)
a science experiment gone awry has deadly simian consequences
10WR: Overly familiar beastie, schocked back to life by superb staging. B+
10 Word Bonus Thought: As new directors go, we suspect Rupert Wyatt could "A"  

COMING SOON: I know that everyone is already talking about Andy Serkis's killer work as "Cesar" in terms of its Oscar battles to come. But I want to let the film settle before I sound off. Anyway, I already suspect this conversation will make me crazy because it'll end up being a "supporting" discussion and "Cesar" is the lead of the film. James Franco's stardom is a red herring ;) 

Pixar's "Brave" (and Animated Earworms)

Raise your hand if you think it was more sneaky-strategic than any secret intelligence spy movie move ever was to release the trailer to Brave (2012) at the exact same moment when the world was painfully realizing that Pixar is fallible while watching Cars 2.  (Yes, yes, the people of Planet Earth ought to have caught on to this during the snoozefest that was Cars but feeling very very sleepy has a less damning quality than feeling very annoyed; people do like a two hour nap now and then.) Redirect the conversation to a happier place!

So herewith the teaser to Brave which opens next June ...alas, not this one. This one is the one where we get Cars 2, damnit. We can't really break it down like Yes, No, Maybe So since it's only a teaser. We wait until the full trailer for that. But here's the gorgeously verdant tease.

We're all YES thus far.

Plus you know how we feel about red-headed heroines. Haven't been this excited to see a head of hair animated since Tangled was first announced... or maybe even since the first peak at Pocahontas back in the 90s ... that luscious windswept black mane. Oh what a sight it was.

P.S. If you can't get enough animation talk now that you're skipping Cars 2 (you are, right?) you might consider listening in on the Animation Fascination podcast which is talking to the animators Chris Chua and Austin Madison about their work on various Pixar films. That's them in kilts below while working on Brave.

Chris Chua & Austin Madison

It's an interesting background listen. Like, I'd never stopped to think how earworm irritating it would be to hear the same line reading over and over again for days on end while you're animating a movement within a scene!

Austin: For me it was Toy Story 3 working on the Potato Head characters, Mrs. Potato Head in particular. She's -- it's George Constanza's mom (Estelle ). That 'Georgie stop playing with yourself' -- that sort of voice. I had to hear 'MY EYE! IT'S BACK IN ANDY'S ROOM!!!' for about a week straight. You can mute it when you're working on blocking but as you get into the polishing phases you really have to listen to it over and over. I was ready to jump off the nearest bridge. Horrible.  
Interviewer: Does that ever ruin the experience when you watch the full film?
Chris: All the time.
Austin: It's tricky because working on a film -- it's really hard for us get perspective at all on a film and how good it is or isn't. To us it is -- you see it almost like a photo album. When I'm seeing scenes I'm thinking about all the dailies of that scene that's been playing in front of me dozens and dozens of times. I feel like only now I'm getting to the point where I can watch Ratatouille (2007) and fully enjoy it. It takes about five good years to get any perspective on a movie.

Can you imagine?

Team Experience: Recommendations, Hot Wheels To Replace "Cars 2"

Since we have a great roster of erratic contributors here at TFE, we should use them more often, right? What has Team Experience been watching?

What's the best and/or worst thing you saw this week?

Kurt (Cinema de Gym): The best thing I saw this week was Page One: Inside the New York Times, a doc that filled a little empty spot in my soul. Of course it's slanted so as to exalt the Gray Lady, but so what. It's thus far the most comprehensive film we have to address where we stand in the world of media, and thank GOD for the invaluable David Carr, a shut-up-and-listen voice of reason who defends the fundamentals amidst legions of people blindly barrelling toward an all-digital climate of media without merit. The worst thing I saw was Bad Teacher (my review) which couldn't even appeal to my sinful love of hating on goody-two-shoe types ("Bad Santa" this is not) and it contains the year's worst character in Lucy Punch's Amy Squirrell. She's unwatchable.

Robert G: Best: Noriko's Dinner Table--so many questions, so few answers. How could Suicide Club become more confusing and addictive with a sequel? Worst Thing: 8213: Gacey House--I have a high tolerance for bad horror. This overloaded my circuits.

Jose: Eclipse Series 27: Raffaello Matarazzo's Runaway Melodramas. Move over Sirk, Fassbender, Almodóvar and Visconti, this man owned when it came to suffering women! I'm still recovering from gasping and sobbing so much.

JA: I'm sort of completely and totally obsessed with Adrien Brody's brief bit as Dali in Midnight in Paris right now. I can't stop hearing him pronounce "RHINOCEROS" inside my head. He says it so many times that the word loses all meaning and becomes this jumble of sound, all nonsense, which is obviously the point - hysterical nonsense.

Robert (Distant Relatives):  I caught up with the 1962 samurai film Hara-Kiri. It's always great to have even high expectations exceeded and see an old film that still feels modern and poignant. 

Michael (Unsung Heroes):  A second viewing of the terrorism comedy Four Lions on Netflix Instant. I declared it the funniest movie of 2010 and I'm pleased to report it has the main quality that makes a cult classic: it gets funnier on repeat viewings.

Craig (Take Three): The best thing I saw this week, cinematically, was Bridesmaids, which was a daftly hilarious experience. (Yes, there categorically should be Oscar nods for Wiig and McCarthy. I ain't kidding.); worst thing, sadly, was Dario Argento's The Card Player (2004) apart from a ludicrous scene involving a life-or-death poker match played on train tracks to a pounding techno score.

Alex "BBats" The best thing I saw this week was a documentary at the Los Angeles Film Festival called Salaam Dunk about a group of Iraqi female students playing college basketball.  I love sports docs (ESPN's 30 for 30 was amazing) and the concept of one focusing on women in the middle east was too interesting to pass up. It was a well balanced film about positive changes that are coming to the region while keeping the problems and challenges in clear perspective (I always forget that Iraqis call the war "The Invasion")  The girls are all so wonderful and their coach is hilarious and so caring towards his students. Definitely check it out when you get a chance.  Didn't see any terrible things this week, but will say that Paddy Considine's Tyrannosaur, while having great moments and acting, was a very emotional confusing movie. It's like a revenge drama where revenge is taken within and often against oneself.

Andreas (Mix Tape): The best movie I watched was John Ford's unduly obscure Two Rode Together, which is essentially Jimmy Stewart & Richard Widmark reenacting The Searchers. The film is dripping with moral ambiguity & gets really emotionally intense toward the end; also, the usually lovable Stewart plays a total scumbag. It works. I loved the movie.

REGARDING CARS 2
I (Nathaniel) meant to write a review but every time I sat down to do so I was just angry. I hated -- and I do mean h-a-t-e-d -- the decision to make Pixar's absolute worst character "Mater" the lead of a nearly two hour movie. I figured I had to ask if there was anything salvagable in the concept of anthropomorphic cars.

Which movie car would you willingly spend two hours with?

Jose: The Phantom Carriage so I could grab Cars 2 and send it to hell where it escaped from! (*sob* I really tried to like it.)

Robert G: What could be better than a ride on Chitty Chitty Bang Bang? A ride where the flying car lets you know how to avoid the Child Catcher and just have a good time.

Michael (Unsung Heroes):  I would like to see a full length feature starring the second hand police car driven by Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi in The Blues Brothers. It would have a nice deadpan sense of humor, its radio would play nothing but great rock and roll, and unlike the insufferable Mater it would be a car of few words.

JA: My first thought was Sam Raimi's 1973 Oldsmobile Delta 88, which has made an appearance in all of his films. It could star in its own documentary - I bet it's got stories to tell. Like, I've always wanted to know what having a 23 year old Bruce Campbell sitting on you was like.

This is where we get off."

Kurt:  I have a soft spot for the Batmobile from the 60s TV show/movie, which actually just made an appearance at my favorite local theater (alas, I missed it). The car reminds me, of course, of watching the show (Pow! Thwack!), but also of being dragged to auto shows with my dad, which I hated in the moment but now think of fondly. They always had cars like the Batmobile at those things. I imagine the Batmobile and I would discuss chasing Julie Newmar and Eartha Kitt, how it was ever able to sleep with all those Batcave gadgets buzzing, and if there's any competition among the other Bat vehicles (that Batsub will cut you!).

Alex "BBats":  I wish the car from The Car (1977) would follow Mater across a bridge...

YOUR TURN, READERS... What have you been watching and which movie car would you gladly see anthropomorphized for a couple of hours?

Box Office: Crushed Cars, Ascendant Woody and Global Hits

We won't waste too much time on the American box office today as it's the usual stories: an animated film tops the charts (don't make me say the name), Bridesmaid barely dipped and Midnight in Paris is zooming up the "all time Woody Allen lists". On this last bit I wish we had "adjusted for inflation" charts at the ready. Those inevitable stories about it passing Hannah and Her Sisters at the box office are going to be annoying because $40 million in 1986 is a helluva lot more ticket-buying action than $41 million in 2011, you know? I'm guessing that Annie Hall, which really captured mainstream attention, would reign supreme if you adjusted for inflation. [updated: yep, ANNIE HALL is #1]

And yes I normally do a new drawing for the box office but I hate drawing cars and the only picture I'd like to conjure in that realm is Cars 2's "Mater" squished flat in a compactor.

U.S. Box-Office (Actuals)
figures via box office mojo

01 CARS 2 new $66.1 
02 BAD TEACHER new $31.6 
03 GREEN LANTERN $18 [review] (cum. $88.9)
04 SUPER 8 $12 [thoughts] (cum. $95.1)
05 MR POPPER'S PENGUINS  $10.1 (cum. $39.2)

the rest of the top twelve are now losing screens... 
X-MEN FIRST CLASS $6.6 [review, top ten X] THE HANGOVER PT II $5.5, BRIDESMAIDS $5.2, PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES $4.9 [review], KUNG FU PANDA 2 $4.1, MIDNIGHT IN PARIS $4.1 [podcast] and TREE OF LIFE $1.3 [overheard & thoughts]

Worldwide Action
It's all about the 4th Pirates film worldwide unfortunately, reminding us that the US hardly has the strangehold on lemming-like sequel culture. Johnny Depp on loop nears another 1 billion gross. Crazine$$.

But let's talk about movies that never get any attention on movie blogs!
I looked at the global charts at box office mojo and thought it was worth sharing. Here are the top grossers that aren't Hollywood for 2011 (Please note: Bollywood does not give figures to B.O.M. so who knows with those films)

2011's Top Grossers (Non-English Language)

01 Hankyu densha 
This Japanese film is based on a best-selling novel about intersecting lives (it uses a public transport line as connecting backdrop). Starring Miki Nakatani and Erika Toda. It's nearly as big a hit as, say, Rango across the ocean but it's Japan only thus far. [Trailer]
02 Rien à déclarer (Nothing to Declare)
Directed and written by and stars (whew) Dany Boon who you might remember as the lead actor from last year's chaotic farce Mic-Macs (which was from Amélie's director). It's a comedy about customs officers during the elimination of the French-Belgium border in the 1990s. This is a bigger hit than True Grit or No Strings Attached overseas and has distributors in various markets but nothing for the US as far as I can tell. 
03 Che bella giornata (What a Beautiful Day)
A very complicated sounding comedy starring Checco Zalone (who also co-wrote the movie) as a security officer in Italy who gets mixed up with an Arabic girl posing as a French woman. Italy only thus far. [Official Site]

04 Kokowääh
German star Til Schweiger (Inglourious Basterds) co-wrote this family comedy and co-stars with his daughter. Warner Bros handled the very very successful German release. Will we see it... or some English language remake here?
05 SP The Motion Picture
Japanese film about Security Police that's based on a TV series.
06 Gantz
A genre film about two teenagers played by Ken'ichi Matsuyama and Kazunari Ninomiya hunting and killing aliens. This one has distributors in some European countries in addition to Asia but the only US plans (at the moment) is a spot in the New York Asian Film Festival which is just about to start (July 1st). 

Here's the trailer for the festival as a whole (cute). If you're in NYC are you seeing anything?

After that in the global charts when its not Hollywood films it's mostly Asian films (they have their own strong markets) but there's one film in particular that our actress-loving heart is thumping for longingly. That's Les Femmes du 6ème étage (Service Entrance) which is a French film about Spanish maids from director Jean-Philippe LeGuay. The Spanish cast includes Carmen Maura and Lola Dueñas (Volver reunion alert!) as the help and Fabrice Luchini and Sandrine Kiberlain as conservative wealthy French employers.

Service Entrance

Strand Releasing has US distribution rights but given that the film is the 79th most popular overseas for 2011 with a $15 million gross (thus far), we hope it gets a hearty US push.

Do you like hearing about foreign hits or did your eyes just glaze over?

Madonna is a Member of AMPAS. Pixar Wears Kilts. And Other News

In Contention "No Refunds" sign posted outside The Tree of Life. It's the crazies.
Towleroad gay pride, Cars 2, Bad Teacher, James McAvoy, etcetera
Twitter Look, it's one of the most amusing Official Tweets of the weekend. 

I mean, who knew? Madonna votes on Oscars?!? They haven't even deigned her worthy of Best Song nominations even though she totally has been. 
Boy Culture reminds us that Madonna has good taste in movies. 

Cineuropa I hadn't been following the Cloud Atlas screen adaptation story but talk about complicated. It's got three directors: Germany's Tom Tykwer, Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski (of The Matrix fame though I wish they were more thought of as the Bound duo); four Oscar winners: Berry, Broadbent, Hanks and Sarandon; six different stories all set in different eras with the actors playing multiple characters.
Wesley Morris if you're looking for a surprisingly strong defense of Cars 2. I love Wesley but Cars 2? Blech.
Everything I Know... reviews the stage to screen concert of Company with Neil Patrick Harris 
The Wrap Taylor Hackford will serve another term as President of the DGA. Congrats to Mr. Helen Mirren.
Filmes do Chico top 100 gay films. One may quibble with the order but how many have you seen? 

Oh, remember that movie The Rocketeer? Wonder why they haven't rebooted that? Here's a fanmade short celebrating it... well, the character more accurately.

The Rocketeer 20th anniversary from John Banana on Vimeo.

Off Cinema
Guardian I'd been wondering why we haven't received any Missy Elliott music in so long. Turns out she's been suffering from Graves disease. But "Block Party" is coming in the near future. Yay. And get well soon, Missy.
fourfour Rich's night out during the gayest of gay nights after NY's historic decision. 
The Daily What "Yahoo 'answer of the day'" in regards to the gay marriage decision. Hee.

Third Looks
I hope it doesn't disappoint y'all that I am not one to rush at every "exclusive" that's posted across 203,001 blogs at once whenever a new anything arrives. But here are three newish ones from the past few days that people seem to like and I do, too. From, respectively:  The Hobbit, The Raven and Pixar's Brave.

Martin Freeman as Bilbo Baggins in "THE HOBBIT" coming December 2012John Cusack as Edgar Allan Poe in "THE RAVEN" coming March 2012Princess Merida in "BRAVE" coming June 2012

Final Fun Fact: The Pixar animation department is wearing kilts every Friday while working on Brave (2012). Isn't that adorbs? (I learned that here.)