Red Carpet SAG: Slinky Angie, Cute Emma, Winning Viola

Red Carpet Conversations continues on the road to Oscar night. The Critics Choice Awards fashions were like something out of easter but the Globes stepped it up with all the colors of the rainbow. Now we've reached the Screen Actors Guild Awards and Pajiba's Joanna has returned!

Joanna:  ‪wooo hoooo fashion‬

Nathaniel:  ‪Welcome back Joanna‬. So how is awards season treating you? You were sick yesterday when we were supposed to talk. Was it red carpet overload?

‬Joanna:  ‪There's only so many ruffles one girl can take.‬ 

Nathaniel:  ‪So we start on a sun-drenched field.

Lane, Wiig, Carpenter, King, and Mol

It was sunny at the SAGs and I'm not just talking about Jean Dujardin's disposition. Look at all the solar rays powering this first group.

 ‬Joanna:  ‪I love love love love love the sparkles on Jennifer Carpenter.  Also, the length.  It's not something you can wear to the Oscars, but is delightfully SAG worthy.‬

Nathaniel: ‪I think the dress is great but maybe not on her. There's something about the lines on the side (gorgeous) that resemble a jutting rib cage. So skinny that one. But I included her as a thank you for being the only good thing about Dexter anymore (done with that show)‬

Joanna:  ‪Oh, yes, our Deb is in need of a sandwich or two.  That's for sure.   Speaking of curves, I'm not usually a fan of frou-frou, but that purple number looks great on Regina King.  She looks very dishy.  Not quite Viola territory, but close.‬ 

Nathaniel:  ‪She is SAG's Social Media Ambassador so I want to click "like" on this‬.

Joanna:  ‪Is she? If I were an ambassador I would demand a sash.  A REALLY fancy sash with Twitter birds on it. ‬

Nathaniel:  ‪That's over capacity fo the red carpet.‬ 

Joanna:  ‪Speaking of accessories. I am not a fan of whatever it is Kristen Wiig has on her neck.‬ A choker? From Wet Seal?  It's competing with the neckline of her dress. 

Nathaniel: I can see that but independently I would digg it. I like that she doesn't try to soften her angularity much on the red carpet. She's got a bit of a dark side, yes?‬ 

Joanna:  ‪Are you saying you think she has handcuffs in that bag?‬ 

Nathaniel:  ‪Shhhhh. ‬No one must know.

 Joanna:  ‪Ugh, her date is so lucky.‬ Can we talk about Gretchen Mol who looks like the fanciest lady on the USS Enterprise? 

Nathaniel:  ‪Hee.‬  ‪I keep wanting not to like it but I totally do. Which is sort of how I have always reacted to Gretchen Mol. No one remembers this but Vanity Fair was trying to make her happen for the longest and I was like "does Conde Nast have stock in her career?" so I was suspicious but i almost always like her in things.‬ 

Whenever I see Diane Lane I think "movie star without the movies"‬

Joanna:  ‪Mol's fancy space collar looks itchy.‬ ‪Oh I remember her and "Vanity Fair"!  I always felt like Weinstein had his sticky fingers all over that situation.‬ But, speaking of Real Genuine Movie Stars, Angelina Jolie was back in her Cruella style. All slinky and drapey and eeeeeevil. 

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What do the Oscar gowns of the past 22 years tell us?

It's something like an urban legend that actresses only wear gold to the Oscar ceremony if they think they are going to win. But check out this frankly amazing infographic from US Dish for lots of other interesting statistics regarding our favorite public thing (Oscars) and one of our secret favorite things: colorology.

What pleasurable research hours they must have put in! They've broken down Supporting Actress and Actress gowns from 1990-2011 ceremonies to determine the top trends for the nominees based on designer, color, dress style, and hairdo. And they've crunched those numbers further to show which elements are most likely to appear with winners and losers. So, for instance, if you really really really want to win you should be wearing gold with your hair up in a floor length gown designed by Gautier. Or at the very least updo, floor-length, brown Randolph Duke!

IT'S SCIENCE!

It won't surprise you to hear that of the 200+ dresses of the nominees, black was worn most often (28% of the time) but I was mildly surprised to see that red was down in 4th place (8%).

I only wish they would have had a Streep Sidebar, since she's there the most frequently and it's actually really hard to find EVERY Oscar dress worn by one specific actress over the years. Not that I've tried b... okay, I've tried. Don't judge.

Jamie, Gary and Emile for Prada

Thanks to TFE reader Grace for pointing this out. While some Hollywood male stars were walking the red carpet at the Globes, still more were walking the red and black carpet for Prada.

Globe snubbee Gary Oldman, Emile Hirsch, Garret Hedlund, Tim Roth, Our Jamie Bell (what? we've claimed him... the extended TFE family I mean which of course includes Glenn, Jamie's #1 fan), Willem Dafoe and Adrien Brody. The stars come out for Prada.

Some of them are more comfortable doubling as male models and not necessarily the ones you'd think. But you can't be rich, famous, good looking and good at everything... now can you?

Red Carpet Globes Pt 2: Ursula's Daughter & Brad's Show Cane

In Part 1, Kurt and I discussed the Best Actress fashions Tilda's alien goddess versatility, Steven Sodebergh and Paula Patton's obsession with yellow, Rooney Mara's lack of humor, and more. Read it. Vote on the polls! Now we move on to a Supportizzzzzzzzzzzz

PART 2

Nathaniel: Sorry. Sorry Propping eyes open! The Globes were mostly an all the colors of the rainbow affair which is just how we like our red carpets. "On trend" is a death rattle for awards show excitement. The Supporting Actress lineup was definitely on trend, what with all those faint blush colors.‪ I had to include Evan Rachel Wood, so as to add the drama.‬

...With Evan there's always drama.

Evan, Chastain (one of them at least), Janet, Shai, Octavia

Kurt: Is she not the scariest thing? i'm getting such a fletsom and jetsom ‬‪vibe here. Come pick up your daughter, Ursula‬
Nathaniel: Ha. I kind of love it. It's so fecund. She's some sort of sea creature all right. The thing that would have really made this look work for me is more drama in her hair. I want the wildness to continue up top. This might have been the most supernatural horrifying and therefore the very best if, say, Jessica Lange's lions mane were up top or a weave for slickness and length. 
Kurt:  ‪Oh, jessica lange. No, Evan looks good, and it's a very cool dress. i just think she's terrifying.‬
Nathaniel: In general? Evan?

Kurt:  ‪LOL. Pretty much, yeah. She'll eat your first born.‬

Nathaniel: And not put on a single pound!

Kurt:  ‪Truth.‬

Nathaniel: ‪I don't really want to discuss this lineup. Why did I spend the time photoshopping? Harvey may be the Punisher but I'm all about self-abuse. I really want to rearrange the dresses at least.

Kurt: Well someone's gotta put something else on dear Jessica Chastain. That poor woman.
Nathaniel: Or maybe put all of them in Evan's dress!‬

Nathaniel: Ahhhhh. Anyway... Janet McTeer is a very handsome woman with an amazing rack.
Kurt: Don't we know it.
Nathaniel: She's also the very best thing about Albert Nobbs and also: her man is hot. Just had to put that out there. 

Speaking of amazing racks, MADONNA!

SMG, Macdonald, Garai, Madonna & Muse

MORE INCLUDING THE MEN!

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Red Carpet Globes Pt 1: Lisbeth is Wednesday

Last week on Red Carpet Convos, Joanna and I were trying on gowns; I borrowed Penelope's (don't judge) and she wore Evan Rachel's.  This week Kurt and I gawk at the Golden Globes but alas, there's no word on which of these dresses Joanna would wear.

Nathaniel: Welcome back to Red Carpet Convos, Kurt. This was meant to be a three-way but Joanna had a fashion emergency off stage of some sort. She's here in spirit and promises to return!‬
Kurt:  A Wardrobe malfunction, naturally.‬ 
Nathaniel: ...which very few ladies were actually having on the Globes red carpet. Everyone (well almost everyone) was so put together. Let's start with Best Actresses of Yore.

Miss 2005, Ms 2008, Dame 2006, Double Dipper 1988 & 1991, and Mrs 2002

poll by twiigs.com

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Kurt:  ‪Reese gets my Lazy Trophy of the evening. ‬Between the dress and that wind-blown hair, she looks like she's shooting Bridesmaids 2...in Chicago.
Nathaniel:  ‪Lazy is an odd adjective for Reese since her signature roles are so go-getter ambitious but career-wise and fashion wise. Okay, maybe.‬ 
Kurt:  ‪Yes on go-getter, but doesn't this outfit feel grab-and-go?‬
Nathaniel:  ‪I feel the same way about Kate Winslet since she's been doing only black and white for, what, four years now? Her walk-in s like hitting the "desaturate" button on Photoshop. But she looks sensational anyway.‬
Kurt: I'm with you. It's "matronly" as all the fashion cops have no doubt screeched, but she just looks so beautiful. I even like the clutch, i mean "trophy placeholder"
 

Nathanile: Hee. Hey, trophies are the best red carpet accessories. Did you hear Helen Mirren doing the voice of Becky on last night's Glee?‬ 
Kurt:  ‪ha! no! the boyfriend and i missed Glee. we watched Stage Beauty, with Claire and Billy Crudup.
Nathaniel:  ‪My deepest apologies. You're still functional this morning?‬ 
Kurt:  ‪hahaha...aw. yes, it's a mess. but in terms of sexuality, i had fun.‬ 
Nathaniel:  ‪That sentence out of context! Watch...

in terms of sexuality, i had fun.‬ 
-Kurt 

Kurt:  ‪omg indeed‬. whoops. But back to this damn dame. Regal as always. Definitely red carpet MVP year in year out‬

Yes, she did!Nathaniel:  I think Jodie wore this color for her first Oscar win? Anyway, it's my favorite color on her. 
Kurt:  ‪I do like Jodie's outfit; however i keep getting, A Fish Called Jodie‬ 
Nathaniel:  ‪A Fish Called Jodie. Now I am imagining Jodie seducing Jamie Lee Curtis ...in French.
Kurt: It could happen.  I know everyone loves nicoles dress, but, bless her, she's such a perennial offender for me. and this number looks like her kids glued macaroni all over it
Nathaniel: Wrong. Jodie and Nicki Kidman Nicki Kidman both look like the movie stars they are. Or were...? The weirdest thing about winning an Oscar is sometimes how much it's like a cliff face rather than a peak.‬ Not for these two in particular. I'm just thinking aloud. Sorry, let's call it the ‬‪Susan Sarandon effect when Oscar is like The End. Mabe I'm only thinking of her because she used to favor the peekaboo cleavage that Kate is blessing us with.‬ It's for ladies that are proud of their racks.‬ 
Kurt:  ‪yes. more on Madonna later‬ 
Nathaniel: HA! So when I was assembling that "previous winners" lineup i kept wanting to including Laura Linney, Glenn Close and Julianne Moore but then had to remember. Statue Repellent!‬ 
 

Kurt:  ‪Poor Julianne...

Psychotic Agent, Silent Actress, Perpetual Loser, Perfection, YELLOWWWWWWWW

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