Olympic Weekend: Her Majesty, Mrs Urban, and Mr Bean

Please tell me you're watching the Olympics.

Like many non-sports people of the world, it's the only time I'm ever interested in sports but interested I am. All in! I love that famous film directors often get to direct the Opening Ceremonies and though I can't say that I think Danny Boyle did a memorable job or anything (Zhang Yimou's 2008 spectacle is a *really* tough act to follow), I did enjoy the comic touches. Always love seeing Daniel Craig suited up as James Bond and the evening's best moment had to be Queen Elizabeth's stunt double hilariously leaping out of a helicopter in that grandmatronly pink dress and the Queen's own sense of humor about herself to say yes to all this slapstick in the first place.

Who knew she had a sense of humor?

You'd never know it to look at her. Her Majesty never looks anything less than miserable (I died at her reaction to that ghastly children's choir) If she had said no, one must assume that Danny Boyle had Dame Helen Mirren backstage with costume on, ready to step in like an eager understudy.

My other favorite bit was Mr. Bean's total boredom while playing the Chariots of Fire theme song on the keyboard and his resultant jogging fantasy. It's probably not cool to admit that Mr. Bean cracks me up but he does.

Most of us watch the Olympics on the telly but look who was happy to be in the bleachers!

Love you, Nicki Kidman! You are a true Olympian in our hearts and an actual Gold Medalist to The Film Experience! xoxoxo

Call me maybe?

What are your favorite Olympic moments so far? I live for gymnastics and they keep cutting away from it. ALSO: any suggestions on how to get better gymnastics coverage are welcome -- I feel like I literally ONLY saw the US athletes tonight and I have no idea how their competition is doing or what they look like. I watch the Olympics because its global. I need other countries in the mix. Please and thanks.

Tues Top Ten: Tennis in the Movies

The world's number one ranked male tennis player turns a quarter century today so in honor of Novak Djokovic why not celebrate with a list of best tennis moments in the movies?

Because... uh...

Are there any? When I first thought of doing this list I was like YES -- little known fact: I played tennis daily one summer in high school and still love the game  -- only to hit a brick wall rather than a low net. You may have heard this complaint before from tennis fans but given the abundance of sports movies of every other stripe it's almost like Hollywood hates the game. Those private tennis courts on celebrity acreage are all going to waste.

I've come up with ten things anyway.

BEST TENNIS SOMETHING OR OTHER IN THE MOVIES

You should know upfront that I've never seen the Chad Lowe boy-in-drag masterpiece Nobody's Perfect (1989) -- no decade ever loved cross-dressing comedies like the 80s -- so I shan't include it. 

10 Wimbledon (2004)
Nobody likes this movie but given the abrupt sharp decline in romantic comedy quality over the past ten years, I bet it'd look pretty good if it came out now. At the very least both Paul Bettany and Kirsten Dunst looked fresh and healthy and sun-kissed as the professional athletes in love.

09 The Witches of Eastwick (1987)
We'll be sure to celebrate this movie's 25th anniversary next month but for now, remember that tennis match? Temperatures are flaring as the three best friends Jane (Susan Sarandon) Sukie (Michelle Pfeiffer) and Alex (Cher) all compete for Devil Jack Nicholson's attention. In a game of doubles things get vindicative and then supernatural.

 

Funny girls and dangerous men after the jump...

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Link Is My Signature Color

Wired an archery coach examines Hawkeye's form in The Avengers. Is Jeremy Renner the world's worst archer?
The Wrap Will Hunger Games make Lionsgate a major studio player finally?
Cinema Blend Bruce Willis plays the older version of Joseph Gordon Levitt in the time travel drama Looper. How to make JGL look more like Bruce since they look nothing alike?
Company Town Disney expects $200 million loss on John Carter. Ouch. 

Lawsuits R Us
Little White Lies a pub in Southhampton has apparently been going by the name of The Hobbit for two decades. Hollywood is suing for copyright infringement.
LA Times Finally have you been following this dramatic "wrongful termination" lawsuit from Desperate Housewives? I haven't because I keep wishing the show itself would be terminated. Apparently jurors were so deadlocked over Nicolette Sheridan's claims that a mistrial was called after four days of deliberations. Most of the juror's sided with Sheridan who claimed her suicide death on the show was retaliation from the creator. How long till they make a TV movie of the trial? The actresses should play themselves. At least it'll get Sheridan some work. I grew up watching her on Knot's Landing so I have a soft spot for her rather hard beauty.

Steel Magnolias Redux
And have you heard that Lifetime has announced casting for the Steel Magnolias remake for television? Remember when we tried casting that right here? The all black version will star Queen Latifah as M'Lynn, Phylicia Rashad as Clairee, Alfre Woodard as Ouiser, Jill Scott as Truvy, Condola Rashad as Shelby and Adepere Oduye (who we got so excited about in Pariah) as Annelle.

Which of those do-overs excites you most? Or is the very idea sacriligeous to you, replacing Sally, Olympia, Shirley, Dolly, Julia and Daryl? 

Madonna Bowl

I was trying to make Sunday the ultimate day of productivity but finally I succumbed to laziness/excitement and just tweeted through the Superbowl. Or, well, half of it at any rate en route to Madonna's much awaited Half Time show.

So let's relive the whole experience right here (in case you aren't following me on Twitter and if you aren't, why the hell not?) since I am too lazy to write up a whole article and there are movie ads and movie references to discuss. Though strangely Madonna's whole Cleopatra inspired entrance didn't occur to me till just now. I was too excited to process anything (still reeling from meeting her).

Below are tweets from me and others. 

• my entire adult life I've heard the Oscars referred to as "the gay superbowl"... so I'm trying to watch 'the straight Oscars for the 1st time
• so far it's really boring. they didn't open w' a comedy routine. no beautiful gowns. you can't even see the celebrity faces. (Helmets. Boo!)
• Tom Brady=the prettiest football star of all time! That's an assumption but a confident one.
• I don't like 'The Straight Oscars' ... too many ugly old men, not ANY pretty actresses #GaySuperbowlOnly21DaysAway
• @StevenMCuevas: If the Oscars at the Gay Superbowl and Rooney Mara's dad owns the Giants, does this mean Rooney wins an Oscar?

One of many incomprehensible Battleship images that could be Transformers cutouts

• @ZeitchikLAT: thank you Battleship, for bringing back large-scale, incoherent school of movie advertising.
• It went away?
  
  MORE AFTER THE JUMP

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I Met Madonna. And Other "W.E." Stories

As some of you may recall from a couple of breathless tweets, I met Madonna two months ago at a W.E. press event though we weren't allowed to publish the pieces until this week. I was invited by way of my columnist gig at Towleroad so I wrote that up now that W.E. in in theaters, well past its Oscar-qualifying run (which netted it a nomination for Most Costumes). Here's a snippet:

She repeats all of our names back to us. Madonna saying your name back to you is a strangely surreal experience, both utterly mundane and impossible. 

She has entered 'The (Mostly) Gay Room' as its been dubbed to discuss her new film W.E., since most of the journalists are with gay publications. "Cool." is her monosyllabic response. She's promised we'll put her in a good mood for the rest of the day. "Let's start with levity," she says though it sounds more hopeful than bossy.  We're all squished round a table with recorders on. 

[read the full article]

In regards to those recording devices. If you had yours on before Madonna entered the room, you could hypothetically listen to Madonna saying your name over and over again on loop once you got home. HYPOTHETICALLY. I mean, who would do that? [ahem]

More including W.E. thoughts and Madge's new video...

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